Getting Fired Was the Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me. Eventually.

Maturepopcorn

Description:

Shadow despises his job and everything about it. Though a hard alcoholic for many years, his drinking has significantly picked up recently. Once fired for drinking on the job, the heavy alcoholism continues, somehow even stronger, ultimately leading to trouble. Through his journey of recovery, he changes his outlook on life and incredible things begin to happen. Drama and angst, this is the most mature and serious fanfiction I've ever written and is about the struggles of alcoholism and recovery; it is meant for older viewers.

Warning:

Yes, there will be a sex scene at some point, but more importantly, this fanfiction covers some heavy topics including alcoholism, sexual assault, and self-harm. This story will be highly triggering, so read at your own risk and don't complain if something necessarily negative happens. You've been warned.

Author's Note:

Before y'all say anything, I'd like to quickly state that I really and actually did do a lot of research before and during the writing of this story. This includes but is not limited to: the price of alcohol, the process of getting arrested for a DUI, going to court, and what AA meetings are like.

I acquired this research by simply living the last five years of my life.

Yes. That is the truth.

Though I rarely get personal about my real life on this website, I feel the need to finally tell the truth to my dedicated followers and friends; the truth is, I'm an alcoholic myself and am in the process of getting sober. I am, no joke, writing this story in a rehabilitation center. This story is a coping skill for me and will help me get my story out on paper, through the eyes of a fictional character; almost all the details of the story are things that actually happened to me, though slightly out of order. View it as a window into my life.

If you or someone you know is going through addiction of any kind, please, feel free to PM me. I may not have much clean time yet, but I'm always available to listen and/or give advice. I may even give you my Snapchat or Kik. Thank you all for your continued support through my struggles and sincere love of my writing; it means a lot to know people actually enjoy these silly things (I say silly but this specific one is pretty serious, so...) 3 :)

~Hannah~

Chapter 001

Shadow blinked open his eyes slowly, letting the early morning sun hit him fully through the cracked blinds. He sighed as he looked at the alarm clock on his nightstand; he had overslept again.

"Looks like I'm late to work again…" he thought, characteristically apathetic.

Slowly getting out of bed, slowly getting dressed and slowly eating breakfast, where he drank a somewhat large glass of brandy, Shadow took his time and finally rolled into work a full 2½ hours late, a little drunk. He was employed by a bank in downtown Westopolis; though he held a comfy position with high paying wages, he had grown to hate his job and everything about it over the past six months. That being said, at just over nine months of employment, it was the longest job he had ever held. Shadow was 25. This, coupled with his overwhelming sense of loneliness and resentment at the world, had driven him to drink more heavily than usual over the last few months as a way to cope.

He had sat at his computer for all of about five minutes before his boss, Hannah, came around the corner of his cubicle and tapped him on the shoulder.

"I'd like to see you in my office, Shadow. Now," she added, quite sternly. Hannah was usually a carefree and happy woman who supported every employee under her as much as she could, helping them through tough times and giving them paid leave whenever they needed it. She hardly ever raised her voice or spoke harshly; Shadow knew he was in a lot of trouble, but he didn't really care.

He waited until she had gone back to her office before standing up and muttering under his breath, "Bitch…" Then he followed her inside, stumbling once. The office itself was quite large and spacious, overlooking all of Westopolis from the 18th and top floor of the building. He knew Hannah had worked hard to acquire her position as president as well as her office, and she was very proud of it; sometimes, however, she could be somewhat stuck-up in Shadows' opinion, and could do with some humility. Needless to say, he disliked his boss as much as he disliked working at the bank itself.

He sat down in a padded chair across from a large oak desk and waited as Hannah stared out the window. He knew exactly why he was here; he had been late almost every day for a month and had been lacking in performance. Shadow was on the chopping block, or so he believed.

"Shadow…"

"Can we just skip the formalities and get right to it?" Shadow boldly asked.

Hannah turned to face the hedgehog and widened her eyes in surprise, tilting her head. "Excuse me?"

Shadow sighed deeply before continuing, "We both know why I'm here and I'd like to get it over with."

Hannah's left eye twitched. "I don't think you know why you're here."

The hedgehog glared. "I know exactly why I'm here. I've been doing a shitty job at my shitty job. I hate it here, you hate me here, and more specifically, I highly dislike you." Shadow hadn't had meant for the words to come out as harshly as they did, but he found himself spilling months' worth of resentment. The alcohol in his system was definitely aiding him in his desire to finally share his true feelings, and he found himself unable to stop. He continued, "Jesus Christ Hannah, I don't know how you've put up with me for this long; I don't know how you put up with this job at all. Either you have the patience of a saint or, more likely, you have connections with the devil." He paused to take a deep breath, then finished by adding, "To reiterate, I fucking hate it here."

Hannah stared for a few seconds. Turning her head and glancing at the hedgehog sideways, she responded, "Are you drunk?"

It was Shadow's turn to widen his eyes in surprise. He quickly recovered, responding, "So what if I am?"

Hannah sighed, saying, "I can smell it from here. This has to stop… If you are to continue working here-"

Shadow cut her off by simply saying, "Fuck off."

"You're fired."

"God, finally."

Hannah gave the hedgehog a look of discomfort. "I didn't want to see you go, especially not like this. I tried everything, I looked the other way so many times; I wanted you to succeed." She shook her head sadly. "Pack your things and be gone within an hour." She hesitated before adding, "By the way, Shadow… I'd like to take you to an AA meeting tonight. You may not work for me anymore, but I'd like to think of you as a friend. If you'd like, I can stop by your apartment and-"

Shadow scoffed, cutting her off again. "I don't want to hear any more from you. An AA meeting? Please, Hannah, I'd rather die."

At this, Hannah's patience finally ran out. Snapping, she practically yelled, "Leave. Now." Pointing at the elevators, she added, "Security will pack your cubicle for you. Get the fuck out of my bank."

Shadow laughed cruelly. Hannah cussed but once in a blue moon; he knew he had struck a nerve. Hannah's only child Robert was currently in jail for a second DUI, and Hannah had been distressed for weeks. The hedgehog didn't say another word, but simply walked to the elevator and went down to the first floor, stopping twice for people to board the elevator. Upon reaching the lobby, he grinned and strolled along to the front door, humming to himself.

The receptionist glanced up from her desk. "Leaving already? It's not even noon."

"Just got fired," Shadow said, chuckling.
The woman, whose name Shadow had never bothered learning, widened her eyes in shock. "O-oh… I see…" Shadow continued humming and exited the building, vowing to himself to never return. He walked the two short blocks to where he had parked his motorcycle and was about to get on it before noticing a paper under his windshield wiper.

"Seriously? A fucking ticket? Whatever…" He walked over and retrieved the paper, turning it over to reveal that it was, in fact, not a ticket.

The paper instead read, "Are you struggling with addiction? Is someone close to you an alcoholic? Help is out there! Come to one of our many AA meetings or call our hotline, as listed below." Shadow stopped reading at this point. He growled softly. How dare they assume anything about his life? He crumbled the paper and threw it into the street, then got on his cycle.

He first drove in the opposite direction of his apartment, heading instead to the closest liquor store he knew, a small family owned shop called We Know. The store was in a bad part of town and, with less police presence, the owners didn't ID minors; Shadow had frequented the store since the age of 15. He pulled up, got off of his motorcycle, tried to ignore the homeless schizophrenic man on the sidewalk, and walked inside.

The store was empty, save for one person behind the counter. Shadow waved and said, "Hey, Noah. How's it going?"

A thin Saudi man in his 30's, with a goatee and mustache, looked up from his newspaper and smiled. "Hello, Shadow, it is going alright," he responded in a distinct, though not harsh, accent. "How are things with you?"

Shadow scoffed. "Remember that job at the bank I hated? Well, they finally fired me. About 30 minutes ago, actually."

Noah tilted his head at the hedgehog, responding, "Friend, I have just the thing for you." He proceeded to pull a large bottle of brandy out from behind the counter. "This is the finest liquor we carry; it is 90 proof and only $88. It will melt all your troubles," he finished, gesturing his arm in an exaggerated arc.

Shadow whistled. "That's a hefty price, even for a bottle that size."

The man behind the counter smiled again. "No, no, you misunderstand. It is only $88 for those I do not know. You, my friend, are a friend. For you, $50."

Shadow, still a little tipsy, thought about it for a moment before shrugging and smiling. "What the hell, I'll take that off your hands for 50 bucks."

"Excellent, excellent!"

The transaction was completed, the money and booze (as well as a pack of cigarettes and a lighter) traded hands, and the hedgehog thanked the man as he exited the store. He got back on his motorcycle and immediately popped the cap off, not caring who saw. He usually kept track of how much he drank by measuring ounces with a shot glass, but this time he drank straight from the bottle, chugging. Most days, Shadow was more "civilized", but today he had no such reservations and simply wanted to numb himself beyond recognition. He drank about a liter of the stuff, glazing his eyes in the process; he then looked over at the aforementioned homeless man. Under most circumstances he would never have even made eye contact with such a person, but in this state, looked directly at him and yelled, "Hey!"

The man wearily glanced at Shadow. He took a few steps forward and timidly responded, "Yeah?"

Shadow, feeling uncharacteristically generous for some reason, slurred, "Y'want this?" He waved the remainder of the brandy, two cigarettes, and a ten dollar bill in his hand and grinned as the mans' eyes lit up. He nodded his head without saying a word and received it from the hedgehog. Popping the lid back off, the homeless man chugged the rest of the liquid in one breath and waltzed inside with his $10.

Shadow took a deep breath. He felt good; a little too good. Before taking off, he decided to call his on-again, off-again "friend", Sonic the Hedgehog. The phone rang twice before a voice from the other end cheerfully said, "Hey buddy, how are you doing today?"

Shadow smiled in relief; he had caught him in a good mood. "Hey, it's goin' alright, I'm good… How're you?"

The line was silent for a long moment as Sonic hesitated. Finally he responded tentatively, "I've been doing alright. How's work been? Are you on lunch or something?"

Shadow laughed a little too hard. "That shitty bitch of a job? Nah, got fired today."

Sonic sighed. He originally wasn't going to say anything, but could no longer hold his tongue. "Shadow, how much did you drink today?"

Shadow let out a "Humph" before answering cryptically, "The details don't really matter, do they?"

Though Shadow couldn't see it through the phone, Sonic raised his eyebrows in concern. "Shadow, I'm concerned… Has everything been okay these last few months?"

Somewhat nonsensically, he responded, "I'll let you answer that," then hung up abruptly. He knew his answer didn't make any sense, but he was too drunk to care; nor was he sober enough to formulate a rational answer anyway. Sighing deeply and rocking his head back and forth a few times, he started his engine and blasted Paramore before tearing off from the store. A blue car honked as it came within mere inches from hitting his motorcycle, but Shadow either didn't notice or didn't care. Swerving between his lane and oncoming traffic, he raced back towards his apartment. Driving as much as 25mph over the speed limit at times, Shadow was honked at four more times, ran two red lights and a stop sign, and came within less than a foot of hitting a pedestrian twice. Somehow, he made it home in one piece.

Parking in his usual spot, he hopped off and walked towards his door. He was, however, stopped by one of his few friends.

Shadow growled, "Not now, Tails," before attempting to push the small orange fox out of his way. This didn't work though, as he stumbled into a fall and was caught by the fox. Shadow breathed deeply through his nose in anger; he hated the physical contact, but not for any obvious reasons.

Though he would never admit it to another living soul, and hardly admitted it to himself, the honest truth was that Shadow was deeply in the closet. He came from a religious family, went to a religious school in a more conservative part of town, and was raised to believe it was morally incorrect to be gay. Though he now lived in bustling downtown Westopolis with accepting friends, with his friend Silver even being gay himself, he was still frightened to come out to anyone, an emotion he pretended not to have all together. In pretending to be straight, he had doubled down on a perceived "manly" personality; he worked out six days a week, dated new women every other week, and, of all his friends, gave Silver the most shit. This was yet another factor in his continued alcoholism.

"Shadow…" Tails' eyes began to water, threatening to spill over; the timid fox was very emotional and cried freely, quite the opposite of his hedgehog friend. "I came as soon as Sonic called me. I was so scared waiting for you; I wasn't even sure if you would make it. If something had happened to you…" A tear rolled down Tails' cheek.

Shadow stood up, leaning his head back. "Tails, do me a favor and shut the fuck up. I'll always be just fine." He scoffed and turned his head to the side, spitting.

Tails frowned and silently cried more. Quietly, almost in a whisper, he continued, "That's not how you talk to friends." He wiped his face with his hands. Breathing deeply, he blinked long and hard, and when he opened his eyes he had a strong look of determination and confidence. Louder this time, Tails stated firmly, "Shadow, whether you like it or not, I'm taking you to a meeting."

Shadow lost his temper. Not caring about his friend's timid nature, he loudly yelled in perfect, non-slurred speech, "Fuck you! First my bitch of a boss, then that fucking paper on my windshield, now you? No. Absolutely not." He pulled his newly acquired box of cigarettes from his back pocket and, taking one, lit it. Blowing the smoke directly into Tails' face, he continued, "Furthermore, how dare you even assume I need that fucking 'program'? That shit's for pussies that can't control their lives. Don't be a preachy bitch."

Tails balked at several things. "When did you start smoking?" The fox shook his head. "That's not important. Ignoring the mean things you just said, my offer is still on the table. AA helps a lot of people, Shadow. Please, just come with me."

Shadow flashed a look of rage, and Tails, losing his confidence, quickly backed off. However, he quietly added one more sentence. "If AA's for pussies, what does that make me?" Softening his gaze, he walked back to his car, defeated. He glanced back once but said nothing before getting in the orange vehicle.

Shadow, shocked, lost his rage and took on a face of shame, something he rarely experienced. He tried to process the simple sentence Tails had left him with. He didn't know Tails drank at all, let alone went to AA; he had assumed the fox was only offering to take him out of kindness and concern. "Is Tails an alcoholic?" he thought. Stumbling, Shadow put out his cigarette by stepping on it and took two shaky steps towards Tails' car, but it sped off before he could get the foxes' attention. "Fuck…"

He knew he should apologize to Tails, but he couldn't bring himself to call him. He hadn't'd even had a plan of what he would say if he had caught up to his car, so what could he possibly say over the phone? Growling in anger at himself, he barely made it to his apartment door. He fumbled for his keys a few moments, then let himself in and made a beeline for the fridge, not even bothering to close the front door. He pulled out a bottle of white wine, an unopened Chardonnay from last month, and chugged the whole thing. He was already drunk, what was a little wine going to do? Or so he thought…

After this, he drank another bottle of wine, this one red, as well as four beers and, to top it all off, a single shot of tequila. Even he was surprised he hadn't'd thrown up yet. Despite all of this, he truly believed he wasn't an alcoholic. In his mind, he was just melting the day's troubles, that was all. He briefly thought about calling Tails, then, immediately forgetting, staggered wildly through the kitchen and into the living room before flopping himself onto his couch and nodding off, leaving the refrigerator door open.

Shadow woke up abruptly with IVs in his right arm, a cast on his left arm, in an unfamiliar bed. Harsh lights hurt his eyes, and a strange red bruise-like mark was on his right wrist. His whole body ached. Though it hurt to move his neck, he slowly swiveled his head from left to right. He quickly realized he was in a hospital, with a bathroom and the room door to his left, and to his right, a window overlooking the very bank he used to work at, as well as…

He attempted to open his mouth, but no sound came out. He took a few shaky breaths and tried again, but only a small whimper escaped him. His eyes began to water unexplainably. He blinked hard and wracked his brain, trying desperately to remember how he ended up here, but the last thing he remembered was laying on his couch for a quick nap.

He took a deep but shaky breath before attempting to speak again. This time he was more successful, letting out a faint, "Tails…"

The orange fox was asleep on the chair next to his bed; unmoving, the hedgehogs' soft, single word hadn't'd woken him. Shadow cleared his throat as best he could and said again, "Tails," this time slightly louder. Still, his friend didn't move a muscle, save for his rhythmic breathing, in and out, over and over.

Shadow began to breathe more heavily; despite the pain it caused his chest, he was practically hyperventilating. Now panicking, he desperately thought of ways to get the attention of someone, anyone. He looked further to his right and saw a red button. Forcing his eyes to focus, which was an effort in and of itself, he was finally able to read the word below it: "Press for nurse".

He attempted to move his right arm and, successfully moving it about three inches, felt pain shoot through his entire body. "What the fuck happened to me?" Shadow thought to himself. "What did I do? Oh God what did I do…?"

Now fully hyperventilating, a machine hooked up to Shadows' chest began beeping loudly, startling him into jolting his body slightly; this sent even more pain through his broken appendages. Tails started, waking up. As the two made eye contact, one scared and one disoriented with sleep but noticeably concerned, a nurse rushed in and scanned the multiple machine screens around the room.

Softly but firmly, glancing at Tails accusatorily as she spoke, the nurse said, "Nice to see you awake finally. Is there a particular reason your resting heart rate is 160?"

Shadow, upon hearing his pulse, widened his eyes in fear and subsequently shot it up to 180; highly dangerous and nearly deadly. He tried to respond with some success, saying, "Sorry… Panicked… Tails isn't… fault…"

The nurse glanced sideways at the floor. Trying to calm her patient, she said, "It's alright, it's alright. Just try to relax, alright? Would you like something to eat or drink?"

As Shadow began to calm down, he looked at Tails and answered shakily and quietly, but fully this time, "No, thank you." The truth was he was starving, but for some reason he didn't want to eat; he didn't really know why. All he wanted was answers. Glancing back at the nurse, he added, "Would it be possible… For you to leave…?"

She smiled softly, not appearing to be offended. "Of course. If you can't do it yourself, have your friend there press that red button if you need anything at all."

As the moment finally caught up with Shadow, he found himself speechless again as he realized how surreal the whole encounter was; the last time he had been in a hospital, he had been four years old. Only there to visit a cousin and barely remembering the experience at all, he had never been a patient himself, save the day he was born. Instead of answering verbally, he nodded in reply.

The nurse left and Shadow looked back at Tails again. The fox opened his mouth to speak but closed it before any sound left it. The two simply stared at each other in disbelief for several full minutes; Shadow had no idea how he had ended up in such a situation and didn't even know all the details while Tails, who understood everything fully, could not or did not want to believe what had happened.

Finally, after an eternity and a half, Shadow spoke. Uncharacteristically soft, careful as to not upset the fox, he whispered, "What… What happened…?"

Despite the hedgehogs' best effort, Tails immediately broke down. He skipped sniffling, waltzed past crying and went straight to eyes-shut, hands-on-face sobbing, letting wails escape his body horribly loudly. The nurse poked her head in warily, then saw who was crying and thought better of entering, leaving again. Shadow was, needless to say, a little freaked out; he knew the situation was dire, but he had never seen Tails like this. After all, wasn't Sonic Tails' best friend? Wasn't he just a secondary character, an afterthought?

Unsure of what to do, he opened his mouth to speak again. However, like the nurse, he thought better of it and shut it quickly. He decided to wait. Another few minutes passed. Tails slowly stopped, tapering down from a sob to a cry, then to a sniffle, before finally grabbing a box of tissues on the nightstand and wiping his face and blowing his nose.

Tails took a shaky breath before finally answering Shadow's question. "You, um… You were asleep for about three days." He sniffled again before wiping his nose and asking, "I'm sorry if this is too much to ask, but can I… um… hold your hand for a little bit? I've been scared out of my mind for days; the doctors thought you might not make it."

Still trying to process the information being told to him and, secretly wanting comfort as well, he simply nodded. He then grimaced and sighed shortly as the simple movement hurt him. Tails winced, quickly adding, "I'll come to you," and held the hedgehogs' hand gently. Shadow asked, "Have you been here… the whole time?" to which Tails simply blinked and nodded.

The orange fox then continued, trying his best to break the news carefully. "From the few witnesses that saw you, we were kind-of able to piece a story together… After I left your apartment around one, you drank quite a bit more and took a nap… That's when you probably blacked out. You most likely woke up around three in the afternoon, and we think you drank again. When Sonic went to your house after you were admitted to the hospital, he noticed you were completely out of alcohol, so my guess is you were on your way to the store when… Y-you…" Tails stopped. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, he closed his eyes and exhaled slowly. "You totaled your motorcycle." The fox opened his eyes, looking on at the hedgehog softly, gauging his reaction. The hedgehog simply blinked in response, and Tails continued, "The people around you estimate you were driving at 75mph when you hit the center divider." He paused here, allowing Shadow to process what he could.

The hedgehogs' eyes had glazed over at this point; he had heard and understood every word, but he felt himself dozing. Not wanting to leave Tails again, he glanced over at his friend and simply responded, "Can you hit the red button?"

Tails did so with his free hand, not letting go of Shadow. The nurse was back in the room within 30 seconds, a curious look on her face. "It's nice to see your pulse back down to 80, Shadow; what do you need?"

Shadow paused a moment, then responded, "What's your name?"

Despite the seriousness of the conversation they had just had, Tails couldn't help but chuckle softly, and the nurse smiled. "My name is Kelly," she answered. "Is that all?" she asked, amusement twinkling in her eye.

Shadow continued in a monotone voice, not one for emotion of any kind at the moment, "Can I get some coffee? Black?"

The amusement left Kelly's eyes, and she let out a soft, "Hmmm…" before answering, "I don't know if that's really a good idea with your heart condition."

Shadow furrowed his brow, confused. "I… I don't have a heart condition."

Tails answered this time, somberly and quietly saying, "Yeah, you do…" Silence fell across the room once more; the tension was as thick as cold butter. After a few moments hesitation, Kelly glanced at the door and gulped softly.

"Oh, honey… If you can keep it a secret, I'll get you a small cup. Just try to stay calm, and don't excite your pulse any, okay?"

"Okay," the hedgehog whispered back, adding, "Thank you."

She left the room once more at this, and Tails looked down. The fox asked gently, "Should I continue, or would you like to take a break?"

Shadow looked Tails directly in the eyes and said, completely off-topic, "I'm so sorry..." before allowing a single tear to roll down his cheek.

A little bewildered, Tails smiled, furrowing his own brow in concern; yet the orange fox said nothing. He looked on at his friend with nothing but concern and love in his eyes, which only made the hedgehog cry more. Shutting his eyes to stop the tears, he continued, "I never should have said what I said. I had no idea you were in AA; I should have apologized but I let pride get in the way like it always does."

Tails squeezed Shadows' hand, though not so hard as to hurt him, and replied as sweetly as he could, "Hey… Real friends don't leave each other over an argument." Grimacing a little, he looked on at Shadow warily. "Are you sure you should be having coffee? I know you've been through a lot but you're acting very different from the way you usually do."

Shadow took a couple breaths and was about to respond when his nurse came back with a cup of coffee. Though he had requested black, and though she had specifically said it would be a small cup, it was a decently sized, nearly full cup with both cream and sugar in containers on the side. Shadow sighed in relief and flickered his eyes, earning a short laugh from both Kelly and Tails. He said thank you, uncoupled his hand from Tails' to hold the coffee, and Kelly left yet again.

Putting a single cube of sugar into his cup and allowing it to dissolve, he glanced first at the brown liquid, then at his friend. "I have a heart condition?" he asked deadpan, his eyes glazing over in defeat. The severity of the situation finally overwhelmed him and he gritted his teeth as Tails responded, lowering his eyes sadly.

"Nobody knew, you um... You were on anti-depressants..." Sensing the fear and shame wash over Shadow, the orange fox swallowed and quickly added, "I am too. There's nothing wrong with it, not at all. Um..." He paused. "Though..."

"Though?"

Tails swallowed again. "You overdosed." He averted his gaze, not wanting to see his hedgehog friends' reaction to this. "When Sonic was at your house, he briefly went through your room for safety reasons and found some bottles. One of them, Wellbutrin I think, said it was filled four days before the... Situation happened... Yet, it was empty. Sonic called back and told me, so I told the paramedics and they said that a side effect of taking it in normal doses is an increased heart rate. So they checked your heart rate. It was, um... Well, I mean, you were going through a lot, y'know? You were hurt pretty bad and you were really drunk, but even so..." His paused, voice quivering as he continued, "Your heart rate was 220. That's about the time you fell asleep." His voice broke as he said, "Shadow, I was so fucking scared."

Shadow glazed his eyes even further; as mentioned a few days before, Tails never cussed. He sniffed and slowly brought the cup of coffee to his lips, then he drank the whole think in one take, breathing between sips through his nose, before finally setting the empty cup on his bed's tray. Then, he held Tails' hand again, and softly inquired, "Well... What does everyone think happened after that?"

The small orange fox glanced at the door, then glanced at their interlocked hands. "You're being awfully affectionate today…"

Shadow rolled his eyes, then closed them. "You already said that in not so many words. Please, continue."

Tails sighed. "Well," he began, "after that you, surprisingly, stood up. You had broken your left arm, four ribs, as well as your right femur and ankle. You mentioned feeling no pain at the time despite standing on your broken leg and using your broken arm. Traffic came to a dead stop, and police and medics both showed up within ten minutes. They arrested you for a DUI."

He would have continued save for the fact that Shadow had interrupted him with, in this order, a sharp intake of breath, a single cough, and a mixed look of panic and pain. Tails panicked as well at seeing Shadow in distress. Tails quickly added, "I think that's enough of that. We can talk more another day."

Shadow, recovering from his outburst of intense pain, breathed out in agreement, "Okay." The hedgehog paused, however, before tentatively adding, "Wait… I'd like to know what I blew on the breathalyzer." One of his guilty pleasures in life was watching the show Cops and he knew fairly well how the scale worked. He held his breath and looked on at Tails, waiting for a response; he expected an approximate 0.300.

Tails sighed out, "You blew a 0.565."

Shadow literally gasped, sending even more pain through his body. Tails frowned, a little angrily, and shouted, "Stop doing that!" Shadow closed his eyes and decided right then he wouldn't open them again until he fell asleep and woke up in the morning.

As Shadow tried and failed to sleep, Tails sat with his emotions for a few minutes. Silence stretched by, and the thoughtful fox decided he would say what had been bothering him for the last three days. "Hey, Shadow…"

The hedgehog, forgetting his self-made promise, blinked open his eyes. "Yeah, Tails…?"

"Um, I don't really know how to say this, but… Um…" He pursed his lips and fell silent, collecting his thoughts. After a few long moments, he went on, "Well, I actually arrived on the scene. The police called me from your phone; apparently, you requested specifically me. You wouldn't get in the ambulance until I showed up and got in with you."

Shadow's heart sank. He knew exactly where this was going already, and he didn't want to have this conversation now. He didn't want to have this conversation ever. He wanted to take this secret to his grave, drinking himself to death over it; that was his life's plan. Now everything was crumbling around him. "Why did I have to crash my motorcycle? Why did I have to black out? Why did I have to get fired?" He shut his eyes again, allowing hot tears to stream down freely. "Why… Why was I born at all?"

Tails dropped his gaze and paused. "I think… Even if you don't remember it, you might know what I'm going to say next, huh?" the orange fox guessed. He squeezed the hedgehogs' hand softly and smiled. "It's okay. Would you like me to say it? Or do you want to?"

Shadow inhaled silently and exhaled loudly. He opened his eyes, even hotter tears streaming down now, and looked his friend, his closest friend, directly in the eyes. Though he had never admitted it to anyone, including himself, the honest truth was that he trusted Tails more than anyone in this world. He trusted Tails with his fucking life. This amazing, sweet, wonderful fox was Shadows' closest friend and had been willing to stick by his side through three comatose days and potentially longer; all Shadow had done through their last interaction was take him for granted, blow him off, and cuss him out. His voice quivering, he finally, finally, finally released one of his deepest, and in his opinion, his absolute darkest and most shameful secret; his secret he had hidden from everyone; friends, family, strangers, everyone. His answer to Tails was a short three words: "Tails, I'm gay."

Tails nodded. He knew. He had already known. Maybe he had always known. Regardless, his secret was out, and he hadn't'd expected to feel such relief. Shadow's voice broke again as he continued, in barely a whisper, "Is that… All I told you?"

A look of wary confusion crossed the two-tailed foxes' face as he answered, "Um… Yes? Was there supposed to be more?"

Shadow continued his gaze into Tails' eyes. He had broken character so much over the last few days, showing so much emotion he always kept bottled up and sharing so much of his deep, intimate life details, he was a little surprised he had kept that "more" to himself. That being said, now in the hospital nearly dead, what was a little more truth? He softened his eyes a little more until all that remained was a sense of pure compassion and… Sadness? The fox, deeply concerned for whatever was to come, held the hedgehogs' right hand with both of his own. Bracing himself for the worst, Tails closed his eyes. He would never have been prepared for the next three words that came out of Shadows' mouth.

"I love you."

Author's Note II: Jesus Christ y'all I'm so goddamn tired I literally, I'm not joking here, had to Google the word "couch" twice to make sure I spelled it right. The staff at this rehab I'm at are not pleased I stayed awake until 3am. That being said, I'm very sorry if there are any plot holes or if something doesn't make sense… I did, after all, write this in one go at 1am-3am. If there are any grammar mistakes, spelling errors, if something just sounds hokey or cheesy or plain stupid, etc. If you spot anything glaring at all, please leave a comment in the review section and I will fix it tomorrow when I (eventually) wake up. I'll proofread it tomorrow and update it anyway whether people comment or not but I appreciate the help. Anyways, I love y'all and appreciate your continued support as I not only write stories but also bear my soul for the first time ever. As previously mentioned, a lot of what is mentioned in this chapter and future chapters are things that actually happened to me; it feels nice to get these things off my chest. Please, be kind in your criticisms and rate this story fairly and honestly. If you didn't like it for whatever reason, tell me specifically why, and I'll try to fix the issue(s) in future updates. Thanks all! Keep reading, keep writing, and keep asking for help; you'll always receive what you need.

P.S. Sorry if the parts mentioning AA feel preachy; AA has really helped me in my recovery, but I know it's not for everyone.

P.P.S. As it turns out, writing and drinking coffee are not helpful when one is trying to sleep. I've already proofread and edited the story, it is now SIX in the morning, and I've slept a grand total of zero hours. Again, if you notice anything, tell me. No writing is perfect. LOVE Y'ALL! *muah*

Love, ~Hannah~