"Love and hate?", he spat arching a brow.
"Isn't that how the best of relationships are supposed to be?", the other asked with nonchalant shrug
"Should I add that to the Wilson's Book of Terrible Advice? I've been keeping score."
He mutters with a smug grin. The oncologist waves a hand dismissing his best friend's statement wearing an unamused expression.
"Third time wasn't a charm for you. How do you know this fling with the frisky cougar won't be a disaster?" He retorts, this time with a cheeky smile.
A frustrated sigh leaves the other's lips and he drags a hand across his face at the nickname. "Her name's Ka.."
He interrupts out of habit, not letting his oncologist buddy have the satisfaction of finishing his sentence. "You know I don't give a rat's ass about this chick's name. As long as she feels you up and you can start using your head again. I'm not complaining."
The other makes a vain attempt but ends up psychoanalysing his best friend as per his habit. "You're worried this might actually work out and I will be happy for once and I won't have enough time for you."
At this, House cocks his head to a side pretending to scribble in a notebook while lying on Wilson's sofa. "He is a delusional lovesick puppy.. always finding a reason to blame his only companion for his shortcomings."
Wilson heaves a sigh trying his best to ignore his best friend. "You know, even if it did work out. It won't change anything."
House continues with his ramblings. "I think he's helping himself to the drugs that are meant for his patients again."
"House I'm serious!" Wilson lets out an annoyed growl while fixing his bow tie.
"Was that an attempt to make me feel better?" House responds by pressing his palm over his chest.
"Cause my heart still hurts." He puts on his puppy eyes pouty face taking Wilson's silence as a sign that he MUST continue.
"I'm sure it's only your second date and she already has you dressed like a penguin. She's good; I'll give her that but doesn't know you well enough to know you hate opera."
Rolling his eyes, the oncologist looks away from the mirror to glance at his best friend. "You're confusing me with yourself again."
Taking a second to think it over before nodding to himself slowly, even when he agreed, House had to make sure he rubbed it in "Ah. You're right. You're not too cool for opera. I am."
And just like that House was on his feet making his way over to Wilson to fix his bow tie, who tried his best to duck when the other got too close but there was no place for him to escape. As if it was the most natural thing to do, once he was done with the tie, House slapped the other's cheek playfully.
"Go get her son!"
Rolling his eyes again, the oncologist responds trying his best to keep his voice steady so as to not provide any further amusement. He was so angry. "Go home House.
"Why? Are you afraid you'll bring her home and find my drunk ass passed out on your bed?"
"Come to think of it, that's actually not such a bad idea." House whispered to himself grinning all the while popping a few Vicodin in his mouth but he made sure he was loud enough for the other to hear him.
"I won't be surprised if that were to happen." Wilson snatched the bottle from his best friend's hands shoving it in his pocket.
"Mommy…Please don't." House whined not bothering to hide his grin.