20 Things
By G Callen
In my two months of marriage I've learnt many things, things that will get you hugs and kisses, smiles, laughter and things that will get you punched, shouted at and worst of all thrown out on the couch. These are the rules I live by:
1. If an ex-partner that once posed as wife turns up, tell your real and current wife, straight up that nothing happened between you.
2. Only ever say nice things about her wardrobe, this also applies to Hetty.
3. Don't treat her as a damsel in distress, no matter how many people have guns pointed at her.
4. Don't accuse her of always wanting the last word, even if it's true.
5. Always remember to buy her a doughnut, and if you forget, give her yours.
6. Never comment on how long it takes for her to get ready in the mornings.
7. Always let her drive, unless she says otherwise.
8. Don't laugh when she punches her partner.
9. Don't laugh when she punches your partner.
10. Show no pain when she punches you.
11. Don't laugh at the amount of stuff she keeps.
12. When she tells you she's pregnant, don't ask if she is joking.
13. Smile when she laughs.
14. Tell jokes to make her feel better.
15. Always pay what you owe when you lose a bet.
16. When you get shot, don't say that it's nothing.
17. When she is upset, give her a hug.
18. Let her defend herself against Sam, Nate and Deeks, no matter how tempting, remember rule 3.
19. If you burn part of the kitchen making dinner, tell her, don't try and hide the evidence.
20. Remember to tell her you love her first thing in the morning and last thing at night.