This OSW is a request from "whosmae" on Tumblr
It is also a soft sequel to the earlier OSW "Lazy Breakfast"
Previously, on OSWs…
"Wow, everyone's really energetic this morning, huh?!"
SHE woke up. And when she heard that Kensei had lost his breakfast to the birds, she remembered.
"Well, we can just have some cake from that new store that opened! You promised you'd buy me some if you lost, remember, Shinji?", Mashiro turned to him, smiling.
Well. So much for his lazy morning.
. . .
"UUUUUUGGGGgggghhhhhhhh…"
The new store Mashiro, and now the whole team, wanted cake from as his punishment wasn't even in Karakura town! It was practically HALFWAY ACROSS FREAKING JAPAN!
… Ok, maybe he was exaggerating, but it was FREAKING FAR AWAY!
He didn't even make it there, either, before getting interrupted by a hollow attack. Normally, he'd have just let the resident soul reaper take care of it, but of COURSE they were nowhere to be seen! And, well, he needed to let off some steam.
He had been playing with it, mocking and cutting, for a few minutes, when he was interrupted for the third time that day. By yet another female soul reaper, no less.
She came and sliced the thing in half, almost taking some of his hair with it!
"Hey! What's your deal, I had it!"
"Yeah, I'm sure you DID, SHINJI HIRAKO!"
"Huh…? How do you know my name?"
"..." If looks could kill, Shinji would have been deader than he already was in that instant… Until the look was replaced by heartbreak… And then cycled back to anger.
While the stranger was going through this cycle, Shinji was just struggling to figure out why this girl looked so familiar.
… Unfortunately, he didn't figure it out quickly enough.
She lunged, sword aimed straight at his throat. He dodged easily.
"Hey-" She spun and attacked again before he could finish. When her sword came near him, he grabbed it. "Hey, I asked you a question!"
She kicked at him, and he grabbed her ankle with his other hand.
"Will you just let me finish!? How do you know my name? I don't recognize you, so you must not have been in the Thirteen Court Guard Squads when I was there, so-"
"You IDIOT!" She spun again, her other foot crashing into his skull and sending him flying into the roof of the building under them. Before he could recover, she pinned him by the knees and neck, her sword a few feet away, forgotten.
It was only pinned like that, that he finally recognized her. "K...K-Koharu!?"
"Oh. So NOW you remember the woman you dated for FIFTEEN YEARS!?"
"You… You DIED!?"
"It's been a hundred years, Shinji! And apparently you were dead THIS WHOLE TIME and FORGOT TO MENTION IT!"
"..."
"..."
" . . . "
" . . . Well?"
"Uh…"
Her voice was sharp, her fury masked by civility like a candy-coated razor blade, "If you're trying to think up an excuse, might I recommend just going with the truth? I HAVE had one hundred years to get over it. If you're honest I MIGHT be able to forgive you. But if you lie, well…" Her grip loosened.
Shinji swallowed, remembering exactly why he had fallen for this human to begin with - now that he thought about it, he didn't think he'd ever seen her angry. Until now.
"It, uh… Might be better just to show you."
Koharu, now sitting on his stomach, watched as Shinji donned his hollow mask.
"… Wh… Uh… How…?"
"Mind if I explain on the way? I was in the middle of an errand."
Stunned, the rookie soul reaper agreed. He had managed to buy the cake (Koharu agreeing to help carry) by the time he got to the part that answered her real question.
"Our gigai age as we do, so we have to move around every few decades, or people get suspicio-"
"So you had to fake your death, and-"
"Y'know, I'm getting really tired of being interrupted! That's, like, the eighth time today!"
"Sorry, haha!" Koharu smiled at him, then sighed. "Jeez… I've missed you."
"-Huh?" Shinji stopped walking and stared at her.
"Talking like this. I've missed it. Especially seeing you get all flustered and annoyed! If I remember…" Her voice lowered. She stepped close to him, smirking and fluttering her lashes. "I was one of the only people who got to see you like that."
Shinji smirked back and leaned in, his view of her feet blocked by the boxes of cake. He felt a sharp pain in his shin.
"Gah! … I take it that's a 'no' to getting back together?"
"One. Hundred. Years."
"Yeah, I should've figur-"
"You should have."
He glared at her.
"So Hachi, Lisa, and the others are alive then, too?"
"Yeah. The rest of the world may have changed, but we haven't."
They exchanged stories the rest of the way: Shinji about the visored and Koharu her life, death, and soul reaper training.
"I need to get back. I'll come visit, though!" Koharu set the boxes down on the front step.
"Sooo… I'm 'friendzoned' then?"
She leaned in close, smirking and looking at him through her lashes again. Shinji tensed, ready for another kick (or worse).
She pecked him on the cheek and whispered in his ear, "Yep!" popping the 'p,' before flash-stepping away.
"Well…" Shinji sighed, "I think that's the best breakup I've ever had."
This is part of my "One-Shot Wednesday" project - I'm trying to write a one-shot every week that other people have requested!
So just leave an idea/request in the comments, message it to me, or send it to me through Tumblr ("CiestessDE").
Just about everything goes - I'll tell you if there's a problem. And you can look in my profile for more info on how the OSWs work, if you're interested!
So please send me ALL the ideas! I will make sure to recognize whoever's idea/request it was in the work – just ask if you want to remain anonymous.
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