Author's Notes: I don't know, I really don't know. I was just thinking, and it didn't turn out like I thought it would, but it came out anyway and I'd like to know what you think. So… just indulge me a wish and review please. Oh, it's not a POV for once, but it is Heero, taking this dive, out of the hospital, episode 2… remember?
Disclaimers: Gundam Wing does not belong to me. Period.
Life is but a Dream
He let the world seethe around him, chaos crashing into more chaos, building to the stars. Climbing, he was always climbing towards something – pushing himself, driving himself into greatness. His heart kept being thrown back in his face, he gave it to something, and his heart failed. His projects died, his missions failed, everything he ever strove for collapsed around him, shattered and the shrapnel sliced him to pieces. Every moment of every day he was pulling himself back together. The world had lost its meaning now, life flowed on around him unchecked, death seemed to stem from him, unplanned and unprecedented, as he pulled himself together, as he fell apart.
He was like stone now, his heart cold and hard as stone, he felt… nothing. He felt absolutely nothing, terrible wasn't a word in his vocabulary, but neither was good. He stood at the abyss, and the brink of oblivion. Things fell through him, he was a transparency, a shell, empty and desire-less. He didn't slip through life, life slipped through him. The world, it all seemed like a dream, and his dreams like reality. The dreams, he felt in the dreams, great, powerful emotions that couldn't be found in life, because life was the dream. It melded to his will, formed around him and compensated for him, only to make his life miserable. Turning, twisting, making unexpected jumps in plot consistency, his life was the dream.
It had to be the dream. That was the thought that kept him going, that was the singular hope that kept him alive for years on end, that kept him from suffocating in the dust. There had to be a time, some moment when he woke up. To wake up.
Here, this cliff, this hospital where he'd been so injured, this oblivion. And he wanted it, the emptiness, he wanted to feel his world fall away, he needed to slip through from it, be gone from it. He fell, he slid away from his life, his eyes fluttering shut and the wind passing through him. Falling like a rock, sliding through the air resistance with perfect aerodynamic speed, like it didn't exist, he shed it off like water. It was peaceful, the world was fading away like a nightmare, he was emerging from the depths of sleep, coming up from the bottom of the ocean, so naturally. Falling. He had stopped his eternal struggle, letting nature take him, slipping away from the dream.
"HEEEERROOOOOOOOO~!!!!"