The Reason for Everything...
Oh boy.
This was it.
I was gonna fly!
"Stephanie Michelle Plum! What do you think you're doing?"
Rats. She caught me. I climbed down the ladder. "I was gonna fly, mommy," I said, twirling around in my cape.
Mom looked down at me and shook her head. "Fly? You can't fly! You're a little girl! Reba Shluck's daughter never tries to fly! Martha Beeter's daughter doesn't try to fly! Why do I have a daughter who tries to fly?"
"I don't TRY to fly," I said, exasperated. My mommy didn't know much. "I DO fly."
She made a frustrated noise and made her way back to the house, leaving me with my cape and my pixie dust. "Come inside and clean up your room!"
I sighed and tromped back into the house, stomping the entire way. And I didn't even wipe my feet off on the mat in the doorway. That'll show her!
"Stephanie, where are you going?" Mommy asked as I was sneaking out the front door.
"I promise I'm not gonna go fly again mommy, I'm just going to Mary Lou's house."
"Okay, but be back at six. Your grandparents are coming over tonight."
"kay!" I yelled, and skipped outside. I wasn't really going to Mary Lou's house. I was actually going to see if Joseph Morelli was outside. I wanted to show him that I wasn't scared of him anymore!
I wandered around the neighborhood for a while, peeking around trees and climbing fences, but I couldn't find Joseph. Finally I saw him by the oak tree a block away from my house. He was sitting with his cousin Mooch, and they had cigarettes.
"Hey Joey," I said, striding up to him. Bah! I wasn't scared of YOU!
"Hi Stephanie," said Joe, "Wanna try a smoke?"
"Sure!"
Mooch snickered. I glared at him. "What's so funny?"
He shrugged and didn't say anything. I snatched the cigarette out of Joe's hand and sucked on it.
"Jeez, Stephy, are you okay?" Joe asked me after my huge coughing attack.
"I'm FINE!" I croaked at him. Rats! I wanted to be tough! I stood up and brushed myself off. "Huhn. That wasn't bad. I was just pretending."
Joe laughed. "Yeah right. I bet you've never ever had a cigarette before."
"Sure I have."
"Nu uhn."
"Yeah huhn."
"Nu uhn."
"Yeah huhn."
"Nu uhn."
"I bet you can't fly!" I yelled. I was so angry. This stupid boy made me SO MAD.
"I can fly," Joe said.
"No one can fly," said Mooch. Well I guess he would know, 'cause he was a lot older.
"I can," I said, "I even have a cool outfit, like Wonder Woman."
Mooch looked at me, eyebrows raised. "You don't have big boobs like Wonder Woman."
I narrowed my eyes at him. "I'm gonna GET big boobs. I don't need them to fly!"
"Prove it!" Joe said.
"Fine!" I yelled at him, and turned on my heel and stomped away.
Five minutes later we were back at my house. I crept inside, up the stairs, and into my room. I tied my cape around my neck and crawled out onto the roof from the bathroom window.
"Are you watching?" I called to Joe and Mooch, "I'm gonna fly!"
"Yeah right!" Joe said.
I sprinkled some pixie dust on my head and leaped.
"OW! OW! OW! OW!" I yelled, flailing around in the roses. Okay, so I hadn't flown, but I was brave enough to jump from that high. I bet Joe OR Mooch wasn't THAT brave.
"Stephanie Plum! What are you doing!" My mother yelled, running around the house towards me.
"I was flying!" I said grumpily.
Mommy wrenched my out of the rose bushes and dragged me inside, groaning the whole way about her friend's daughters and how THEY never destroy rose plants.
After all my cuts were washed and Barbie band aids were put on, my mom took away my cape and told me I was never allowed to fly again.
"But MOOOOM," I wailed.
"No flying! You'll kill yourself!"
"Wonder Woman can't die!"
"What?"
"What?"
"You just said, 'Wonder Woman can't die'." Joe mumbled from beside me.
I'd been dreaming of the day I jumped off the roof! I rolled over and smacked Morelli.
"What was THAT for?"
"It's YOUR fault I jumped off the roof, you OAF!" I yelled at him.
"Cupcake, what are you talking about?" Morelli half sat up and rubbed his eyes.
"The day I tried to fly, it's your fault! You told me I couldn't!"
"So?"
"So I did it! Everything you tell me I can't do I do!"
"Well that's a good omen, isn't it?"
"Huhn. Maybe I wouldn't be like this NOW if you had just AGREED that I could fly."
"Jeezus, Cupcake, that was years ago."
"Still your fault that now I do the opposite everyone says," I grumbled.
"Okay, how about, don't have sex with me?" Morelli said, grinning down at me.
"Okay, maybe it isn't so bad…"
THE END