"Leaving."
South Park Oneshot by ToniTheTerror / dark--romance.
Title: Leaving – StanxKyle
Beta: Emi.
Warnings: Stan and Kyle angst. Yaoi, whatever.
AN: Reviews aren't necessary, but greatly appreciated, and I would love you lots. –Toni.
DISCLAIMER; I do not, no matter how frequently I wish it to be so, own South Park and I do not make any money from writing this story.
Stan Marsh had been through plenty of bad times in his life. The whole of South Park knew about his terrible break-up with Wendy Testaburger back in 4th grade. Their relationship had never been too fantastic. There was also when Sparky, Stan's dog, died. Then Stan's many terrifying encounters with police, kidnappers and other strange and dangerous people. Everyone also knew about his 'Goth-phase' just around the time when he and Wendy had broken up. Stan had tumbled into the first signs of childhood depression, and was probably one of the first in his ring of friends to experience it. The Goth kids took him in with open arms, but soon enough the image of sunshine himself, Butters Stotch, pulled him out and brought him back to the land of the happy and free. Congratulations to Butters, of course, but soon enough he began to dip into blackness once more. Then there could be no-one to help him.
Except for his best friend, of course. Kyle Broflovski had never failed to be there, watching over Stan, making sure that he stayed here, with him. Kyle tugged him out of the enticing circle of depression so many times that it was almost becoming a chargeable service. Though Kyle would never take money from Stan.
Since Stan had been through so many hard times, he would have thought he'd be used to it by now. But he was only used to it when Kyle was there to fix it, and help him through it. What about when Kyle was the cause of the hurt and the pain? Then who would fix it?
--
"Kyle! You've got to talk to me about this!"
Stan stood in the doorway to Kyle's room, as the red-head himself scurried about inside. Kyle's room had once looked so full; packed to the brim with certificates and medals pinned to the walls for intelligence awards, or little craft pieces displayed out on the shelves. Everything had once been neat, tidy and organised. It had been a cosy place to spend an evening studying science with your best friend for a test the following day, and Stan had many happy memories with Kyle in this room.
Even now, at their ripe ages of 18 and 19, Stan being the older, the pair had still many memories. For instance, beating each other at countless PS3 games like they were kids again, and when a real kid, Ike, walked into the room, they would act as if they were kids, too. Kyle would shout that Stan had cheated, and Stan would respond with the proposition of a fight. The two would then play fight until Ike rolled his eyes and left them well enough alone.
Now, however, things were much different.
The tables, shelves and walls were bare. Even the calm green wallpaper had been stripped and showed only ripped fragments on an ugly white plaster back. The only signs that Kyle had once lived in this room were the green and orange bedcovers, Kyle's favourite colours. All the other objects, like his craft hobbies, trinkets, books, posters and awards were all packed into a suitcase, along with Kyle's clothes.
"There's nothing I need to talk about. It's simple, Stan. I'm leaving and there's nothing I can do about it!" Kyle said, shaking his head as he sat on his suitcase to jam it shut as he zipped it closed.
"It's only your fucking work, Kyle! They can't boss you around!" Stan implored, using his hands as he spoke, a habit which had followed him since 4th grade. Kyle merely sighed, not bothering to argue further. Stan, however, bwanted/b to argue.
"And what's all this?" Stan asked, gesturing to the walls that were now ugly, and completely struck of every essence of Kyle that they held.
"It's a wall, Stan. We stripped the wallpaper for when Ike moves in here..." Kyle said quietly.
"Ike? What, so your fifteen year old brother is just going to move into your room and completely replace you when you go off to some 6-hour distanced away science lab to work with a bunch of nerds that don't need wives because they might as well just be married to their fucking computers?! You're fucking 18! You're hardly even legal! Just because you seem to be channelling Albert Einstein's brain, doesn't mean you can drop your entire life when something big pops up!" Stan yelled, outraged by how calm Kyle was being.
"Stop it, Stan. I've dreamed of this job for a long time." was all Kyle answered, in the same tone once more.
"What the fuck, Kyle?! I know how long you've wanted this, but you've known me longer! I've been your best friend longer. Don't our promises mean something too?"
Kyle didn't answer, he just continued to attempt to zip the suitcase closed, but it wouldn't budge.
"Kyle! Fucking look at me!" Stan barked to Kyle's back. He could see strings of red hair budging out from beneath Kyle's permanent green hat. But the Jew didn't turn round.
Stan growled, entering the room and gripping Kyle's shoulders, forcing him to show Stan his face. Stan was expecting a bland expression, one of guilt perhaps.
But not tears.
Never tears.
Kyle's almond shaped eyes were tearing up, his eyelashes clutching onto each tear before they were released to splash onto Kyle's red raw cheeks. His pale face had suddenly been tinted a warm and irritated red colour as he had become so worked up. His vibrant jade green orbs for eyes shimmered as the Jew looked into the shocked face of his best friend, and more tears promptly fell. Kyle's whole body was shaking, and he couldn't for the life of him stop it. All he did was shake, and cry, and whimper.
"Kyle... I-I never meant to-" Stan began to say, but stopped abruptly as Kyle began to shake his head.
"I...I don't know why I'm crying. I'm too old to cry. I just... I'm just scared..."
And with that, Kyle broke down in Stan's arms, clinging to his shirt and sniffing loudly. Stan was momentarily frozen, his arms in an airy hold about Kyle's back, but they dropped and held the slim Jew close.
"It's okay, Kyle..." Stan said, trying to remember what Kyle would say to him when he was upset. "Everything will be okay. Just watch..."
"But it won't, Stan! I'm leaving for that job... I've got no choice, and I won't ever see anyone again. I'll end up like you said... married to a computer!" Kyle sobbed again. He was crying so hard that it would have been hard for anyone who was not the redhead's best friend to understand what he was saying. But Stan did and leant to hold Kyle in his arms more securely.
"Kyle, that won't be you. I was angry when I said that. Not all of-"
"But I'll be lonely!" Kyle almost screamed into Stan's shoulder. "I'll be lonely forever. Without anyone there. It'll be just like it is here! My family, my friends, they'll all forget me! You'll forget me! I won't eve-"
Stan cut Kyle off immediately with a sharp push of his shoulders upwards. Kyle stammered and looked into the angry eyes of Stan once more.
"When did you get the stupid impression that I'd bever/b forget you?! That insults me, Kyle." he said, keeping a grip on the Jews shoulders.
"I...I just-"
"No, you didn't think about what you were saying." Stan said, and then sighed. "Just like I don't... Come on, sit down..."
Stan led Kyle to sit on the bed, beside the over-packed suitcase that was only half zipped up. Kyle sat beside his friend, but was called to lean in by an arm hooking him over the shoulder. Kyle leaned and rested his head on Stan's chest, sighing and listening to Stan's steadying heartbeat.
"Look, Kyle... You'll never be lonely because you have friends that worry about you. We might not seem like we're paying attention, but we are. There's me, and Kenny, and I'm sure even Cartman cares a little bit."
Kyle gave a grunt of disagreement and squirmed, but Stan rested a loving hand on Kyle's neck to cool him down. Stan knew this boy inside out, as Kyle knew him also, and Stan knew that when Kyle was worked up, nothing calmed him better than a reassuring touch.
"Even with Cartman being like he is. It's their loss, not yours. You have a fantastic family, and sometimes you might not get along but... you remember that time you ran off?"
Kyle blinked, a little guilt showing in his eyes. One day the stress of his family's expectations got too much to handle, and Kyle just ran. He stayed in an overgrown hide out for 7 hours, before Stan and the rest of the Broflovski family had found him. Sheila Broflovski had been crying her eyes out over her Buppie since she noticed him missing. Kyle nodded, wincing a little at the memory.
"Well they worried. They might expect big things of you not listen to you or pay more attention to Ike, but a family can't be everywhere at once. Sometimes things just have to be taken slowly, and life doesn't deal fair shares. You have so many people that love you no matter what has happened and what will happen. You're going to fall out with people, but it's natural. In the end, you see who really cares about you, and who you need to value as a friend."
"I've stuck with you, haven't I?" he asked, lifting Kyle's chin with a finger so the jade pools met the dark blue ones of Stan. "I might get mad with you, or disagree, and I might be a bad friend sometimes. But more often than not, I'm here. I'd side with you before I knew the whole story, and..." he paused. Kyle blinked at him slowly, not saying anything but anticipating what was next.
"And... I love you. I love you to bits. You're my best friend, and you're my homework helper, and you're the one who can make me laugh like no-one else can. You make me do that stupid laugh, and you make my jaw hurt from smiling... You're fantastic, Kyle... And if you take this job, I-... I'm coming with you. I'll sleep in the basement of the lab if I have to. I'll be like the hunchba-"
"I wish you'd learn when you need to shut up, Stan." Kyle said quietly, smiling softly as he faced downward to hide his coloured cheeks.
"S-Sorry?" Stan stammered, wondering if he'd said a little too much.
"You're amazing..." Kyle mumbled, shifting a little closer to Stan, under his arm. "And... I love you too. Just so you know."
Stan blinked slowly, opening his mouth to speak, then closing it again when he realised he hadn't the faintest idea what was happening.
"I'm not going to that job..." Kyle said. "I'm staying right here. With the family that love me, with the friends that love me... With iCartman/i and with the one bI/b love."
Now Kyle looked up, and Stan was washed over with relief to see that the redhead was grinning hugely. Stan laughed, a stupid, relieved, beyond happy laugh that made him sound like a complete retard. Kyle giggled softly and snuggled into Stan's neck in an affectionate hug.
"I need to unpack..." Kyle mumbled a few minutes later after the pair had sat in the same hugging position.
"Unpack? You're barely falling into the category of packed..." Stan said, looking at the suitcase that was half closed and spilling over.
"Shut up, smart ass." Kyle teased, punching Stan's arm lightly and getting to his feet.
Stan stood also and went to unzip it.
"No wait!" Kyle said, meaning to stop Stan, but failing. Stan had opened the suitcase, and the lid fell open. On the very top sat Stan's poofball hat. The blue fabric with the red rimming was folded neatly atop Stan's brown jacket with the red trim and collar. Stan had though he'd lost these garments a few days ago, and had been using a spare jacket he found in his closet, and feeling considerably colder about the ears with no hat to cover them.
"My... My jacket? And my hat? What are they doing here?" he asked, picking them up and unfolding them.
"I... I'm sorry! Stan, I'm really sorry! You left them here, and... And I knew I'd be leaving, so... I didn't tell you I'd be leaving, and I knew you'd be mad, so I wanted to take something of yours with me... So... So I wouldn't forget what you smelt like.. Or what it felt like to hug you or how stupid I feel when you put that hat on my head or..."
Kyle trailed off when he saw Stan smiling. He wasn't just smiling. He was positively beaming.
"I love you so bad right now..." he mumbled. Kyle blushed a deep scarlet and cleared his throat nervously.
"W-Well... Good. I guess... I'm glad you're not angry..."
"Angry? How could I be angry? That's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me..." Stan said, taking Kyle's hat in his hands quickly, and swapping the green ushanka for his own poofball. Kyle grinned lopsidedly, and Stan winked cheekily.
"Come on, forget unpacking. I'm taking you for something to eat. Show you off in that hat."