A KAOS agent wanted to defect to CONTROL. Little was known about him, except that his name was Andre.
A meeting was arranged at a swimming pool at a Hilton hotel in Washington DC. The agent chosen was 86-AKA Maxwell Smart.
The meeting was arranged for 8:00pm. Max arrived at 7:45. Despite it being summer, the pool was fairly empty.
At 8:00, a beautiful woman arrived. She was blond, and wore a red dress and high open-heeled dress sandals. She walked over to him and pulled a cigarette out of her purse.
"Excuse me, do you have a match? I have run out of them." She spoke with an East European accent.
"Er, no. But I have a lighter."
"That will do."
He took it out and lit her cigarette. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm waiting for a man."
"It is me you are waiting for-Maxwell Smart!"
"YOU?!"
"That's right. I am Andrea, but I prefer to be called Andre."
"I see. Well, it's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Andre. I am very happy that you have decided to join the forces of niceness and goodness."
"Thank you, darling."
"And what's a nice girl like you doing working for KAOS, anyway?"
"I grew up on the wrong side of the tracks, I guess."
She reached into her purse and drew out a silver canteen. She opened it and took a long swallow.
"Would you like a drink?"
"No thanks. Not on duty."
"But this is a special occasion, darling!" She smiled.
"Well. . . This IS a special occasion."
She gave it to him and he drank. Then he coughed. "That's strong stuff!"
"Russian vodka-only the best!"
"Our vodka is pretty good."
"Perhaps."
He gave her the canteen back. She closed it and put it away. Then she looked closely at him. "You are a very handsome man, Maxwell."
"Why, thank you, Andre."
She slowly walked closer to him. "I could really go for you!"
He nervously backed away from her. "Well, I'm a very go-able man, I guess!"
She continued walking toward him, and he walked away from her-right into the pool!
"Ah, am I embarrassing you, darling?"
"No. I just felt like taking a swim."
"With all your clothes on?"
"Er, it's still hot!"
"Well then, I think I will join you."
She kicked her shoes off and put her purse beside them. Then she jumped into the water-with her dress on!
"This is nice!," she said. She swam over to Max and put her wet arms around him. He tried to get away, but he succumbed to her charms; they kissed.
Getting out of their kiss, Max noticed a woman standing on the edge of the pool.
"Hi, 99-99!"
"I came by just to see if you needed help. But I guess that you don't!"
"This is Andre. I thought she was a man, but she's a girl."
"I can see that!"
Andre swam to the side of the pool. "Help me out, would you, darling?"
"Sure-sweetie!"
99 brought her hand out, and Andre grabbed it. But instead of climbing out, she pulled 99's arm, causing her to fall into the pool!
The two of them started wrestling in the water. After a few seconds of this, Max pulled a gun out.
"All right, you two-stop fighting!"
Andre quickly searched herself. "That's my gun you've got!"
"That's right, Andre. I took it off you while we were kissing!"
99 smiled. "Max!"
"And what's more, I know for a fact that you're not the real Andre."
"And how do you know that?," she asked.
"Because the Chief showed me a photo of HIM!"
"Damn!"
"Great work!, Max!," said 99.
She pulled her gun out, and the two of them led the fake Andre out of the pool. They paused to let her put her shoes back on and get her purse, then they led her to the parking lot, where the Chief and a couple agents were waiting.
"Surry about that, 99?," said Max.
"About what, Max?"
"About kissing the false Andre."
"It's OK, Max. I forgive you."
She kissed him.
The real Andre's dead body was later found in one of the hotel rooms.
Rather than face execution, the false Andre agreed to join CONTROL.