Gokudera Hayato lived in the dark.
He thrived on the unknown, because all that he does know is rotten to the core.
OOO
"Hayato," his father smiles, placing a too-large hand (only mother's will ever fit perfectly) on top of Hayato's head, "Who knew you were such a prodigy in abstract art? Your piano playing today was wonderful! Why don't you play for everyone again next week?" Without waiting for an answer, his father saunters off to other more important duties, leaving Hayato alone.
Hayato feels the absense of warmth like a phantom limb; even if it was all wrong, the hand was approval and love- something he yearned for. He allows a small, shy grin to blossom on his face. For father, he would endure.
OOO
"It's Gokudera Hayato," The whispers surround him, suffocate him, "the bastard." Hayato slouches more as tribute for the shame of his father's heritage then straightens his back to defend his mother's blood. He lashes out so no one can see the wounds- deep, deep, and ever growing.
He wears his scowl like a mask so no one comes closer to his heart. Everyone who has already been there had left their mark, etched it painfully in to prevent him from making the same mistake twice. Father gave him lies for his love. Bianchi poison for his trust. And mother- he had adored her and loved her and he would have done anything for her, but she left him. She left him all alone in the big scary world of deceits and half-truths; he would never forgive her for that.
But these people, these vermin who aren't even worthy of touching the ground his mother stood on, they don't deserve to even talk about mother. Mother was his. For Mother, he will lash out and teach them their place.
OOO
"I will defuse all the bombs with my dying will!"
Hayato watched in amazement as the mousy runt from earlier tear off his clothes in a fit of passion and his own life to save him! Even when he had been so rude earlier and so coarse!
When he saw the single bomb fall to the floor when he (foolishly) attempted the triple bomb, he had been relieved in a certain way. This is the end of me, he thought, the end of all the pain and loneliness. Finally, I can rest.
Gokudera Hayato was many things, but he was not stupid. Persisted years of loneliness had left a hole in him; a hole that would swallow him up sooner or later. Better sooner. Somewhere along the line it had turned into him being rejected rather than rejecting. He had no reason to live for himself, and no one else to live for. He stopped caring about his own life a while past already. He'd thought that there would be no one left on this godforsaken earth that would ever care for him again.
But this man, he realized, his eyes widening and softening and tearing up at the same time, this man is...willing to accept me?
"I was mistaken!" He shouted, bowing his head in reverence, "You're the one who is fit to be the boss! I will follow you! Command me to do anything!"
His tenth's eyes widened comically as he stuttered out obviously halfhearted excuses. (So modest! Gokudera thought with adoration.)
For this person, his Jyuudaime, he will become the best right hand man that ever was.
OOO
"I wish that Gokudera-kun would just be my friend."
Hayato's eyes popped open. This man, his beloved tenth, never ceased to amaze him.
Friend. He mulled the word over and tried to catch the flavor of it. He hadn't had a friend in so long. In truth, he had been so afraid to call his tenth that because everyone else that he had flitted away from him as soon as he bequeathed that title to them.
Italy… Italy was tempting, so tempting. He would be able to return to the place of his birth different. Now, he would be above them - those whispers in the dark and cold glares from the shadows. He would be going back as a powerful member of Italy's most amazing and well-known mafia family, the Vongola.
But…Jyuudaime wanted him to be his friend. Friends stay. Friends watch each other's backs. Friends never left. So even as he longed to be stronger, he would be that friend to the first man who saved him.
Jyuudaime… Gokudera whistled happily as he pulled out his phone to call Yamamoto, his mind made up. He was going to give his trust one more time. Please, he prayed, be worth it.
OOO
80 years later
"Jyuudaime?"
"Yes, Hayato?"
"Thank you."
"Eh-h? Ah, so out of the blue? For what?"
"For being the first one to stay."
Tsuna couldn't control the overflowing tears anymore and allowed them to run freely down his face. He turned the chair that he sat on away from the hospital bed, though his hand stayed in his. Tsuna felt Kyoko's hands on his shoulder allowed them to distract him for a moment from the pain.
When Gokudera closed his eyes for the last time, he was content. His Jyuudaime had stayed even until the very end. Even when all of the others left. Yamamoto, Lambo, Ryohei. Every one of them left him through the years. Only Juudaime was left, but still, he stayed.
"Hayato? Hayato? No, no!"
OOO
"Baka-dera, what took you so long?"
"Yare, yare, well, we just have to wait for Tsuna now."
"Bossu will come soon."
"The herbivore had better be quick."
"Kufufu, then our family will be complete once more."
OOO
Gokudera liked to think that he died in the light.
He thrived on the people he knew, because somewhere along the line, they'd proved themselves to be trustworthy.
Finally, his family, his famiglia, would be complete.
OOO
"Mama, is that you?"
Fin.