I never thought it would end like this...

"Sakura, I'm home"

My heart jumped in my chest, was I dreaming, is this real? Then I saw him: tall intimidating and all dressed in black. There was something in the air, some kind of tension.

"Sasuke kun!" I said excitedly "you must be looking for a place to rest, please make yourself at home", all this time i diverted from his gaze, something felt strange, i didn't know what it was.

He came in, I made him something for dinner and he fell asleep on my couch. His gaze followed me around as if trying to memorize me. I wanted to feel flattered, but I couldn't... I didn't know why.

I took his cape off and covered him in a blanket. Seeing him so peacefully, it made me happy, I know I love him. I touched his cheeks lovingly and admired him... for some reason there was a weird feeling in my chest, an uneasiness. I turned off the lights and went to bed. Sleep did not come easy.

I opened my eyes and momentarily forgot I had a house guest, quickly fixing my hair and brushing my teeth i came out the bathroom ... " I'm gonna make Sasuke breakfast" I thought happily. So I headed outside my bedroom, and found him staring out the window, admiring the village.

"Sasuke kun, why are you up so early?" Something was not right, that feeling crept up again, more intense than ever.

"Sakura, I'm leaving" he stared right into my eyes , intensely, so intensely.

"B-but you just got here"

"I know" he looked down, as if ashamed, as if...terrified.

"Well at least let me make you breakf-..."

"Sakura" he interrupted

"Sasuke-Kun... what's happening?" I looked at him and searched for his gaze, he looked at the village then at me, it seemed to be a long time until he answered, but maybe it was just seconds

" I can't stay here Sakura"

"You've only been here for a day... what do you mean..?- " I was nervous, my hands were sweating.

" I needed to see you, I needed to talk to you" he paused.

.

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" to tell me what? " the sadness in my words couldn't be hidden.

"Sakura... " he stared straight into my eyes "don't wait for me anymore... I'm not returning, I'm not staying. I'm leaving today and I don't know whe-.." he corrected himself ," I don't know If I'll be back".

I did not know what to say, I don't remember if he said anything after that, I just remember my heart breaking.

After some time I uttered something

"If you don't want to stay then maybe I'll go with you?"... I started crying by now, a couple of tears, for some reason I didn't start sobbing desperately in front of him. I wanted him to know I was strong.

"No Sakura " he said firmly but softly, delicately

"Sasuke I ... I love you "

"I know"...he pinched his nose as if frustrated... " I know" he sighed...

"Then?.. why not give us a chance?.. I've been waiting for you since you left, I've not wavered." I stared at him firmly, I wanted to convince him, I wanted him to believe me, " I love you Sasuke Uchiha" I said firmly into his eyes.

He stared at the window again, and he stared, and he stared...

"Sakura I'm sorry...

...I'm sorry but I don't love you... not how you want me to love you"

So there it was... was that the confession hanging in the air all this time? Once he got it out of the way the air almost cleared, the silence was unbearable and I was just ... I was torn apart.

"I don't want you to wait" he said " I want you to live your life, get married, have kids " he paused " L-love someone, someone else"

Was he crying? Hmph, of course not, but he was sad. I guess he knew he was saying goodbye... i didn't want to acknowledge it back then.

"Sasuke kun I ..." I sobbed " there's nobody else for me but you, I've waited for you, I love you, i want to be with you ... i don't even think about anybody else. You are what I've always wanted! Nobody compares to you !" I said almost screaming, I've never believed more in any word that I've uttered like In that moment.

I was fighting for my life, for my love.

"That's a lie Sakura " he said softly

" its not a lie ... there is nobody for me but you"

"There is Sakura, you just don't see it, I know there is" ... " there is somebody out there who will love you like you want to be loved..." ..."like I would like to love you"

"Why can't you Sasuke? Why can't you love me ? Am I not good enough? What's wrong with me, why don't you wanna be that person? Why?" I sobbed desperately, tears were falling more frequently now. The conversation was ending, the goodbye was approaching. I knew it...

I felt it

" Sakura... I don't love you"... he stared at me so intensely " I can feel your love for me, every moment" ... " this is not because of you"

"Then why?"

" I don't want to stay here... not for anyone" he said

" I don't love you Sakura "

"Yeah you mentioned it " I said bitterly "but maybe with time you could learn to" I wasn't done fighting for him.

" no Sakura you don't get it...

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...I don't think I ever will"

It was all a blur then, he grabbed his cape. He closed the window. He opened the door...

"Sasuke!.. at least...at least let me make you some breakfast"

"You shouldn't..." he said

"Hey, I've waited for you for more than 7 years at least give me a breakfast" I wanted to sound playful. Maybe it just sounded sad.

"Hmph"

He sat down while I fixed him breakfast. We ate in silence. I was heart broken, he was too. He was losing a friend. I was losing a dream.

He left after we ate.

He didn't say goodbye.

He closed the door.

I cleaned the table, washed the dishes, headed to the hospital.

I never heard from him again.

I hope... I hope he's doing good.

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Thank you for reading this, its my first story. I adore sasusaku, but i thought that maybe after all Sasuke went through, he didnt want to cause anybody anymore sadness, and he considers Sakura one of his most precious friends. So it pains him to tell her this cause he knows that hes never getting his friend back, he cares for her unimaginably, and wants her to be happy. he just knows its not with him. I cried while writing this. I recently went through this so I guess its a bit cathartic for me ( I was the sakura and a very important person was my Sasuke hahahaha). Im sorry if its ooc, as i mentioned this is also kind of a retelling of my story through this characters i love so much and obviously DID NOT CREATE. Thanks for reading, be positive. The world keeps spinning.