Sakura lay awake. It was two in the morning and his snoring was still grating her ears. This was the last thing she needed - a late shift at the hospital had sucked her dry and all she wanted was sleep. He rolled over toward her, wrapping his arm around her small body. She felt his erection uncoil against her thigh and tried to inch away. His body was hot and sticky, unpleasant to touch in the humidity of their shared bedroom. Sakura played with the idea of getting up, moving her bedding to the couch and sleeping there. She'd entertained this idea for the past three months, when it all started to turn sour. But she could never bring herself to do it. She knew it would hurt her husband.

Here I am, she thought, twenty five years old. One of the best neurosurgeons in Konoha. Intelligent, young and damn beautiful to boot. How the hell did she ever end up so unhappily married to Naruto Uzumaki?

Sure, he was a lovely guy. When they met in college, him in on a sports scholarship and her studying med, it had been love at first sight. Two dates, then sex. Less than a month later they were living together. They married once they left college, once they'd landed stable jobs - Naruto did construction work part-time and Sakura worked under the guidance of legendary neurosurgeon Tsunade at the hospital. And they were happy. Before the money started rolling in.

Naruto was scouted while playing for his local football club. A hobby soon escalated into a full-time job. A job full of travelling around the world, playing in different tournaments, surrounded by fans. Three months and he'd already raked in millions. Any of the female fans that fawned over his abilities and chiseled features would give anything to be in her position.
But she wasn't happy. Sakura wanted her life back. The life where, after a hard day at work wrestling with disease and desolation, she could come home and forget. Naruto made her forget. He would be dirty and sweaty from the construction site, but always smiling and exhuberant. They'd curl up on the couch and watch a movie, or skip that step and go straight to bed. Best friends and passionate lovers.

But things had changed. Now he was always overseas. And if he was home, things weren't the same. They'd go out to functions dressed up to the nines, have their pictures taken for fancy magazines. They'd have dinner in expensive restaurants. They even moved out of their apartment by the river and bought a fancy house and two fancy cars, in a neighbourhood surrounded by snooty rich people Sakura detested. And their once-active sex life had dwindled into almost nothing too. She didn't know whether he'd lost his sexual prowess, or if she'd just lost interest. Either way, the spark was gone. And she didn't know if she could bring it back again.

She stood up. Wrestled with her silk nightie, trying to straighten out the deep creases that annoyed her so much. Naruto had bought it for her from Spain, gifting it to her after assuring her it was very expensive. She missed the old oversized Led Zeppelin shirt he gave to her a year ago, after telling her how irresistibly sexy she looked in it. Yet another thing to disappear with the introduction of money - the word sexy. He called her beautiful, perfect, stunning - but never sexy.

Smoking was also banned. Naruto had to quit when he began his illustrious lifestyle, and he forced Sakura to quit too. But sometimes she needed a bit of relief. And she found it in a packet of Malboro's.

She stood on the balcony as she lit one up. It was a hot summers night, but a cool breeze which washed over her like a wave made it tolerable. Sakura looked out over the perfectly clean, manicured, boring suburban streets that now made up her neighbourhood. Thinking of all the things she had lost. Her life by the river in the centre city. Smoking whenever she wanted to smoke. Her old jeep, traded in for a god-knows-what-but-cost-an-absolute-fortune. The couch, TV, movies. Communication. A husband who was there for her. Passion. And the love they had shared since college, that she thought would last forever.

She couldn't keep the tears back any longer. They flowed, unrestrained, down her face. She missed the past and she hated the present - but she didn't hate Naruto. So she was stuck. Maybe the romantic side of their relationship had officially left the building, but he still knew her better than everyone else. She loved him like a brother. And he was still in love with her. And what kind of sister, Sakura thought, breaks her brother's heart? She felt resigned to a life of being second-bested to football. Rotting away alone in her glorious mansion was the only future on the horizon.

"Sakura?"

Naruto was calling out from the bed. Perhaps the smell of smoke had awoken him. She frantically stubbed out her cigarette, wiping her wet face as she did.

"What are you doing over there?" He sounded half-asleep - his words were slurred into something almost incoherent

"Nothing, honey."

"Come back to bed. I'm cold."

She shut the porch door and padded back over, crawling in next to him. She tried to keep him at arms length, not wanting him to catch on. But he always did.

"Have you been smoking? Sakura!" Naruto appeared to have woken up a little. "You know how bad that is for you! You're a doctor! You see the effects every day!"

She bit back a snide retort about how neurosurgeons dealt with brains, not lungs, and how perhaps she should deal to his. But it was late. And she was so, so tired. So she nestled in beside him, tried so hard to fall asleep. But her mind wandered, as it always did. Strayed, though she tried so hard to stop it. Every night se played this game in her head. Thinking about anything else, everything else, to stay faithful. But it never worked, and every night, in her imagination, she found herself somewhere else.

With someone else, who she knew she could never have.