First, all the characters in this story are the property of JK Rowling and Rick Riordan. Except Tim the waiter, I totally made him up. His depth of character will be awe inspiring. I may do a whole series about Tim the waiter. No shit. This story is not for profit and all that other legal stuff. Don't try to sell it, as it is free on the internet. Unless the FCC changes that for us.

Second, a word about Canon. I don't care about Canon. I only follow it when it fits my story. I use it as a skeleton to hang meat on. If you want Canon to be followed perfectly, Ms Rowling has about eight books you can read, and Mr Riordan has, I don't know, a bunch. I've read them all, but don't have every detail memorized and no inclination to look minutia up. I'm just lazy that way. So minor deviations should probably be ignored. Its not like I had Hermione sacrificed to Odin at the Hoover dam or anything. Although I might in the next set of chapters. That might be fun to write.

Third, I write for feedback. Please let me know what you think, good and bad. And if you have any ideas for my next set of chapters, which will possibly be titled "Harry Potter, Lucky Bastard" or "What? I read!" Let me know. They might also be titled "Shut up Ronald" or "Hermione Gets Sacrificed to Odin at the Hoover Dam."

Finally enjoy. That's why I wrote it. To best understand what is going on you should probably read the first story in this series, "The Orphan" which can be found here: s/12647907/1/The-Orphan . Its a joyful lark about Harry being shipped off to Camp Half Blood so as to protect him from his miserable family. Its short and has a few nice bits about killing Medusa, and explains what Percy and Annabeth are doing at Hogwarts, and why Annabeth looks like a 19 year old swim wear model. If you don't feel like reading that, then they are there as punishment for the robbery of a pizza shop in Texarkana for which they are wrongfully convicted by the agents of NCIS Texas.

No, not really. Just read the Orphan, I'm too lazy to explain it here.

This story begins at Harry's first year at Hogwarts. Beyond that, you're on your own. Good luck.

WTF Annabeth?!
Chapter 1

Percy

We were all excited to be going to Hogwarts and it didn't take long for either Annabeth or I to decide on our plans for the school year. We both used her cell phone to call the parents, and both were disappointed but understood. The good news was mom had taken my advice and had a new sculpture to sell, and hoped to use the money to return to school. Sadly Gabe, my step father, had disappeared without a trace. Annabeth had a more difficult time but promised to come home at Christmas if she could and discuss her future education then.

Neither Rue nor I had much to pack and it was all already to go since we got back from the quest. A load of laundry and we were ready. We were bringing everything as there wasn't much of it and we were not sure if we would be coming back. Chiron agreed that he would send our beads via the headmaster of Hogwarts if that were the case and we thanked him. It would be my first, and perhaps only, bead so I really wanted it. Annabeth already had five, and Rue, well he had the record. Eleven. The first bearing only three letters, RUE.

At about 3:45 we left in the morning darkness to meet at the hearth where we expected to meet our escort, Rubeus Hagrid. We found Chiron waiting there when we arrived and saw Annabeth coming over from Athena with her backpack. She was tired and had been up all night packing, but everything she had was in her backpack which had the same spell as Rue... Harry's satchel, only cast on it by Athena. She said she had been up half the night doing laundry and throwing books into her bag.

While we waited Chiron told us what he knew about Hogwarts, which wasn't very much. It had been founded centuries ago by the greatest wizards of their time, and had been in continuous operation ever since. It was overseen by a board of governors, selected by something called the Ministry of Magic, which itself was ran by a congress like body called the Wizengarten. It was ran by its headmaster, Albus Dumbledore who was so widely respected as the greatest wizard of his time that none dared challenge him or how he ran the place. Like Camp Half Blood, it existed in a place that was unplottable and if mortals stumbled upon it, they would only see rubble from an old castle.

I asked how we would be traveling and he tried to explain something about a flue network, but it made no sense to me, and I suspect it didn't to Chiron either. He also did not know if we would be returning before next summer as his messages to and from Dumbledore were both brief and vague. Of course Annabeth hugged him, just in case she wouldn't seem him for nearly a year, and Harry and I were both nervous about the unknown world we faced. I think Annabeth was too, but she had a lot more on her mind, mainly how to drive me crazy with her romantic infatuation. In case we were not coming back for a while he gave us all gifts, Harry's was a bow as he had done pretty well in archery and he urged him to practice it, especially shooting on the move as he was still weak there. Annabeth received a dagger, only this one made of mortal "bone" steel, and I a sword of the same material, "in case you run into mortal monsters that can't be hit with celestial bronze." Mine was called "The Lady of the Sea" and Chiron told me that Rue could explain the name to me.

Suddenly there was a flash of green light, a cloud of smoke and a eight or nine foot tall man with a course beard and hair stepped out of the hearth. He appeared to be wearing clothes that were home made like a pioneer would, and had several furs draped about his person. He looked around for a second, then thought to look down and saw us.

"Mr Hagrid! A pleasure to see you again after so many years!" Chiron exclaimed. "Harry, this is one of your namesakes, Rubeus Hagrid. It was he who brought you to us nearly eleven years ago."

"Harry my boy, let me look at ya, see how yev' grown" he grinned as he knelt down to being more near our height. "Crimaney Lord Chiron, what ya been feeding 'em?" He asked as he wrapped his arms around Harry and pulled him close. Harry wasn't a bit nervous or thrown off by this, Mr Hagrid just had a comforting presence.

"So I'm named after you? But my name isn't Hagrid" Harry smiled.

"Noooo no! You're Harry Potter, Harry James Potter. No, Professor Dumbledore decided you needed a new name in case you know who came looking for you. See, names have power and can be traced if ye know how. So, he had you called Rubeus McGonnagal. Rubeus Hagrid is my full name, I'm the game keeper and Keeper of the Keys at Hogwarts. Professor McGonagall teaches transfiguration and the Headmaster gave you her last name. She's the reason you're here instead of... well, never mind that. Dumbledore will tell you all about that. Today, we need to get your school supplies. Now then, you must be Perseus Jackson."

"Just call me Percy" I smiled. I really liked this Hagrid. You ever meet someone that you just liked from the first time you saw them and talked to them? Well, that's Hagrid.

"I can do that. Perseus is a bit of a mouthful frankly, and you must be"

"Annabeth Chase! So very nice to meet you Mr Hagrid" she smiled as she extended her hand.

"Oh just call me Hagrid, everybody else does." He grinned with a twinkle in his eye. He let her shake a couple of his fingers as that was all she could grip.

"Hagrid, we were not sure if the children would be coming back to camp today or not. The Headmaster's communique was vague."

"Well there is no where to for them to stay until they leave for Hogwarts in a week, so I imagine so. We should be back in four or five hours, tops."

"Then would it be possible to connect the fireplace in the Poseidon cabin to the flue network instead of the main hearth? I fear I would have difficulty explaining to the other campers why these three are appearing in a flash of light in the middle of the day."

"That shouldn't be a problem" Hagrid replied. "So who has traveled by flue network before?"

"We uh,,, what was it they called it? Apparating? A few days ago." Harry said.

"Hmmmm, well the flue network only works between fireplaces, and, uh, you don't tend to throw up as much. 'Course some people do at first anyway. All you do is step into the fireplace, throw down your flue powder, and say where you want to go. But, you have to do it one at a time, and as soon as you get there, step out so the next person doesn't land on ye'. Got it? Lets give it a try shall we? Who is first?" He asked as he held open a small grey bag.

We looked at each other, then all stepped forward, then laughed.

"Well. They're all brave aren't they Lord Chiron?"

"Indeed. They make me proud."

I stuck my hand in the bag and pulled out some power that seemed like ashes. I started to step into the hearth, but Hagrid stopped me and said "Just throw the powder down and say real clear 'Diagon Alley', Two words, 'Diagon Alley. Got it?"

"Got it!" I said as I stepped in. "Diagon Alley" I said as I threw the powder to my feet. The world exploded and I felt like I had turned completely to smoke for a minute, then I was staring out of the fireplace at some really strange and dark bar. I stepped out as I had been told, and then one after another Rue, Annabeth and Hagrid arrived.

"Well now, that wasn't so bad was it? Hagrid asked as Annabeth had a coughing fit and threw up.

"I'm so sorry, I... I guess I have a weak stomach for that sort of thing."

"Thats okay Miss Annabeth, it happens a lot to first time travelers. May I ask, aren't you a bit old to be starting training?"

"Oh that, I'm only twelve. I've been, uh, for lack of a better word, cursed by Aphrodite to be in love, and part of that is having a body grown enough for it."

"Well, lucky boy somewhere I surpose"

"Yeah not so much" I mumbled.

"What's that Percy?" Annabeth said.

"He said 'yes he certainly is." Harry answered for me, saving me from a morning of abject misery. "Where are we Hagrid?"

"Oh, this is the Leaky Cauldron, in London. Its how we get to Diagon Alley."

"The usual Hagrid?" the bartender asked

"Can't today Tom, I'm on Hogwarts business."

Then Tom saw Harry and made a huge deal about him being back as we tried to leave, but we did not know where we were going. Other patrons, of which there were fortunately few, came over to welcome Harry back. Finally Harry asked Hagrid what that was about as Tom returned to work and the patrons returned to drinking. But everyone stared at Harry smiling anyway.

"You're famous Harry, you're the boy who lived." He said as he tapped on the back wall of the bar with a small pink umbrella.

As the day went on two things became apparent; that Harry was famous to these people, and that male magicians have no immunity to the effects of Aphrodite. People kept saying "Good morning Mr Potter" and "Welcome back Mr Potter" to Harry, and the guys all stared at Annabeth. I'm not going to lie, it was kind of cool having the super hot girlfriend at times, even if I didn't want a girlfriend, and didn't really like the one I had been given. She had sold me out to an ass kicking in the creek a couple weeks ago after all. Still, kind of cool.

Every thing went pretty well though, we started at a bank for wizards called Gringotts where we found out that Rue was rich, and we were able to get withdraws with our Lotus cards. Here the limit was a thousand galleons, so we all maxed it out. That was way more than we needed, and we came back later to open accounts for Annabeth and myself. She wanted to open a joint account. No!

Harry had a gigantic pile of treasure in a vault he inherited from his father, but in the end threw four or five hundred of the galleons he withdrew on top of it. The monetary system made no sense at all, and we all tended to over spend, but at the end of the day most of what we had withdrawn we still had. While there, Hagrid excused himself to pick up something in a vault for Dumbledore and we waited in this cart like device with the goblin banker that was driving us around. Annabeth had originally wanted to kill all the goblins but was talked out of it by Hagrid. That was the first time I suspected that Hagrid wondered about Annabeth fitting into the world of magic.

Most of our shopping went fairly easily. We started at the robe shop where Annabeth was a bit demanding as to her hemline; she wanted it shorter and higher than the rules intended. In fairness the rules didn't really say anything about hem lines on the assumption that no one would want them shorter and higher, only that girls stockings had to be knee socks. Annabeth hated that too. She asked Hagrid if she could dispense with the sweater and just tie the white button down in front like Britney Spears did in that old video, but no one knew what she was talking about and Hagrid, out of an abundance of caution, said no. Finally we ordered our robes, and thanks to magic we would have them before we left Diagon Alley. Annabeth did make us buy a few extra as we had the money and we wouldn't have to do laundry as often, and that made sense to all of us. She also mumbled something about spending the week sewing hem lines and getting to Victoria's for proper stockings but we didn't pay attention to any of that. None of us liked the hats but Hagrid said we would rarely wear them and if we didn't bring one at all no one was likely to notice. Annabeth got one anyway, but it was more modern looking and she figured to wear it with her hair pulled back, what ever that meant.

Next was the wand shop where we were all fitted for wands by Ollivander. I explained I had my parent's wands, but like a good salesman he suggested that I have my own as "the wand chooses the wizard!" Ollivander showed us how to shoot sparks, and after several tries on several wands, we all were able to. My new one had a phoenix feather core as well, like my dad's, so I felt comfortable getting it. Ollivander told me that it was curiously from the same Phoenix that gave up a feather to the wand that gave me my scar, and that was rather creepy. Annabeth wanted to try stupifying something once she got one that shot a tingle up her arm and threw sparks everywhere, but Ollivander pointed out there was no one to stupify, and that was a spell we wouldn't learn until later in our first year.

Tell Ares that big guy.

At the book shop Annabeth stopped a couple of teen age guys and asked what she should be studying for first year, and after some confusion reconciling her looks to her age, they told her that really she would just want to be prepared for potions, as the instructor in there was a jerk who liked to torture first years and through something called "legilimency" was able to look into their minds to see what they feared most. Then she tried to buy every book in the store, but Hagrid talked her into getting just a first and second year set, as well as "Hogwarts, A History" and one he called his personal favorite, Scamanders "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them." But while we were buying ours she came back with a text on legilimency and its defenses. Harry and I found books on quidditch, as well as a couple on wizards dueling spells and self defense with magic. We figured to augment what we had already learned at camp and really be ready when we went back, assuming we did.

It was almost lunch time in London, and well past breakfast time for us, so we took a break and had lunch in the alley at a small cafe that served the best food and something called "Butter Beer" which tasted like cream soda and butterscotch and wasn't bad. It wasn't blue though, but the waiter, a guy named Tim, tapped it with his wand and turned it blue for me. We took this time to ask Hagrid questions about the school year mostly, and learned that while we could stay over at Christmas if we wanted, we would have to go somewhere the following summer. This was good news obviously as we had all grown quite attached to Half Blood.

Hagrid asked if we had practiced any spells, well, really he asked Rue that, but we all answered. We each knew at least five now and could cast them with some certainty they would have an effect. Rue knew more as he had been practicing them longer. Annabeth and I had really only practiced on the train in the evenings. When Harry mentioned the cleaning spell Hagrid got excited and told us how it could be reversed. When he was at Hogwarts it was a regular thing just before room inspections to walk by the doors of the other houses and cast it so they would fail, but it got so out of hand that soon all the houses posted guards outside their dormitory areas to prevent such meddling. Of course we asked him to teach us how to reverse it, and though he wouldn't demonstrate it, his instructions were pretty clear. Okay Ares Cabin, get ready to shovel Pegasus poop the rest of the year!

We finished lunch and as we did Hagrid became a bit antsy. Once the last fork was down he announced, "Now, fer dessert."

Hagrid reached into his satchel and pulled forth a cake box, and within it a home made birthday cake with blue icing and red letters that said 'Happy Birthday Harry'." The lettering was near incomprehensible and that told all of us it was made with a great deal of love.

"Did ja think I's fergotten?"

"Uh, well, no, I thought Annabeth did! I figured she was the only one who knew it here." Harry smiled while Annabeth blushed. Yep, she'd forgotten.

We dove in and the cake was wonderful, if a bit smashed by being carried in a satchel.

Finally there was cauldrons, quills, parchment and the myriad of other things on our lists. We passed a broom shop but Hagrid said we were not allowed to have brooms as first years.

"But Hagrid," Rue said, "You sent me one with my other things, through Chiron."

"Well uh Harry, strictly speaking, Professor McGonagall did. She thinks you will be a great quidditch player like your father was. Best keep that hidden away."

"Oh, well we can hide ours too!" Annabeth said, and we went in and got brooms as well. I knew that night we would all be trying to fly, and I would have to get a satchel like Harry's.

"Hagrid" I asked, "the satchel you sent to Rue, how does that work?"

"Who's Rue?"

"Oh, that's me. Everyone at camp calls me 'Rue' because until a couple of weeks ago, well, that was my name. No one else at camp knows who Harry Potter is. They just know Rubeus McGonagall."

"Really? Well... I'm flattered." He grinned, and I swore his eyes twinkled a bit. "Ta answer yer question, its just a regular satchel but it has a spell on it called an 'indetectable extension charm' that lets ya put about an acre of stuff in it."

"Could you show me how to cast that so I don't have to carry all this?" I asked. I had all my purchases in bags that were really starting to weigh me down, and the broom was awkward to carry. And the galleons weighed a ton! How could these people not know about paper money?

"Oh! You can just put your stuff in mine Percy! We're going to room together at school anyway" Annabeth said with glee.

"Uh"

"Ermmm, no, Lets get you a bag. At Hogwarts, the girls sleep on one side of the house, and the boys sleep on the other. Its uh... best that way. Ah! Professor Flitwick! Just the man Percy needs!" Hagrid said as the tiniest full grown man I had ever seen came walking by.

"Ah Hagrid!" he replied, looking up, "How are you today?"

"Good good, just taking some new students around to get their supplies. Professor, may I introduce three of your first year students for the fall, Percy Jackson,"

"Pleased to meet you Master Jackson."

"You too Professor"

"Annabeth Chase,"

"You're first year?"

"They grow fast in America." I said,

"And" Hagrid got out before Flitwick interrupted him,

"Harry Potter! So its true! You're back! And at Hogwarts! Its an honor to meet you Mister Potter, I.. I taught your parents not so many years ago, and fought with them in the Order against you know who. There has never been a braver pair of witches to come through Hogwarts... you, you have your mother's eyes."

"Thank you sir." Harry managed to choke out.

"So how may I help today?" the Professor asked. Hagrid explained I needed a bag with that charm on it that he was talking about, and as there was a leather shop beside us I purchased a leather satchel much like Rue's cloth one. While I was in the shop, with Annabeth, Hagrid and Flitwick talked to Harry. When I returned the professor was happy to cast the charm for me and as he did, Hagrid explained that as charms professor, Flitwick was the best person to cast it. Hagrid later explained that strictly speaking, he, Hagrid, wasn't allowed to do magic, which seemed odd for someone working at Hogwarts and living in a world of magicians.

The charm worked magnificently and everything I owned in the world fit in it. I thanked the professor and he told us all he looked forward to teaching us, although he particularly beamed at Harry, and just kind of shook his head at Annabeth. Then he asked if I wished to password it so others could not use it and I said "sure!"

"Well then, what word shall we use?"

"Annabeth!" Annabeth nearly shouted.

"Uhh, but then everyone would be able to open it Annabeth"

"Ohhh! That's good thinking Rue!" Annabeth replied.

He saved me again.

"How about 'Trident'?" I said.

"Ohhhh that is a good one!" Annabeth grinned.

And so that became it. Trident was perfect and I trusted all the people who knew it to not go poking around in my things.

Hagrid wanted to buy Harry a pet owl, and given it was the symbol for Athena, Annabeth wanted one too. She asked if I would be getting a fish or something, but I didn't want to have to take care of a pet. And I was more of a dog person anyway. So I waited outside, going down my list to make sure I had everything when they came back out and Annabeth was carrying two bird cages with grey owls in them.

"This one is mine, I named it 'Perseus' but I'm going to call it 'PJ', and 'AB' here is for you Percy! That way our owls are mated for life as well" She gleamed.

"What the fuck Annabeth? What do you feed an owl?'

"Oh you just let them out at night and they feed themselves in a nearby wood or field. They catch mice ya see." Hagrid smiled.

"In our woods?" I exclaimed, thinking of the monsters that were stocked there.

"Oh. Yeah, for the next week we might want to just sneak them some bits of meat from dinner." Harry said.

With that we were done, and purchased flue powder so we could return. As we were strolling back to the Leaky Caldron, we passed a store for Amazons and Rue remembered that was where his tent was from. We went in and were told they were quite expensive, but that when set up together they expanded their interior space exponentially. We didn't know what that meant, but it was explained that if you set up one, it slept four, but if you set up two, it slept sixteen. Three slept thirty two and so on. And for every one that was added, the interiors became more elegant and refined. When asked how much they cost, we were told ten galleons each, and they had five in stock. We bought them all.

Every one else liked Rue's tent too.

We then used the flue network to leap back to Poseidon's Cabin, with the understanding that a couple hours before the train left we would meet Hagrid in the Leaky Caldron again.

That night the camp celebrated Rue's birthday as well, and the cake was designed by Aphrodite cabin and baked by wood nymphs and was just as filled with love as our dessert at lunch time. Annabeth presented Rue with an "auto quill" that wrote class notes for you automatically, and I gave him something I had seen in the broom shop called a "quidditch bat." I still wasn't sure what a quidditch was, but it would definitely be in pain if someone hit it with this short club. Not to be left out, Hermes cabin, led by Luke, gave Rue a pair of flying shoes, which like the others looked just like regular flying shoes until you said the command word 'Dolios", These were really cool as they also changed into whatever was appropriate footwear for the occasion. Aphrodite cabin gave him hugs and kisses on the cheek from all of the daughters there, the last and best was on his lips and from Selina the Head Counselor there who Rue had always been quite close to. That may have been the best gift of all actually. It got the most "wooo's" from everyone anyway.

The Stoll brothers both gave Rue Camp Half Blood tees, which still had the camp store tags on them and were probably stolen.