Summary: What made Tuffnut decide to change his hairstyle? (Pre-sequel)
Few things actually pissed Tuffnut Thorston off into a red-hot rage. One surefire way was to threaten or mess with Chicken. Another was to try and harm his dragon, Barf and Belch.
(Messing with or harming his sister got him into a cold calculated rage in which everything appeared fine, but you would not see the end coming until it was miles too late.)
A third and previously unknown method of firing thge boy up was apparently to just be Snotlout Jorgenson.
That was all Astrid could figure anyway, as she watched the Jorgenson boy run screaming and stumbling across the muddy field, Tuffnut swinging an oversized axe at his heels.
"I'M SORRY, OKAY?! I'M SORRY! SOMEBODY HEEEELLLLP!" Snotlout screamed as Tuff narrowly missed severing his spinal cord.
Astrid cracked her knuckles and then her neck, sighing.
Five seconds later, Tuff was on his back in the mud, getting it all over his face as he tried to staunch a bleeding nose. "Ow," he complained morosely. Astrid hefted the axe, testing its balance.
"Sorry, Tuff. Couldn't let you deflower such a beautiful weapon on Snotlout."
"Ah, it's okay. It wasn't paid for. Kinda yanked it away from Gobber as he was handing it to a customer."
"Bet he was thrilled. So, what exactly did Snotlout do?"
"Ugh, do I have to tell you?"
Astrid smirked. "Does it involve Ruffnut?" she guessed, knowing both of the twins were fed up to here with Snotlout's excessive flirting and serenading and Gods-knew-what-else.
"It involves a boner for Ruffnut. Pressed up against MY back."
She couldn't help it. Astrid burst out laughing, leaning against a fence post for balance. "Are you - are you serious?!" she gasped.
Tuffnut sat up angrily, trying to scrape mud off himself. "Not only did he mistake me for HER, since she didn't wear her braids today, but he comes up right behind me, with a raging, STIFF AS MJOLNIR'S HANDLE -"
"Okay, okay, shhh," Astrid managed, trying to calm her friend down. "I get the idea!"
"Not that I would care if a boner was MEANT for me, but -"
"Tuffnut, for the love of Thor, keep it down!" she snickered.
"But he goes, 'Hey, Ruff, wanna go on a midnight ride', and I fuckin' - AAAGH, I am just feeling so violated right now!" He punched the ground, sending mud spattering in his face.
Tuff actually really did sound upset. Almost on the verge of tears upset. Astrid bit her lip in sympathy and offered him a hand. "Well, you can't kill him since I'm sure he's half-way to Dragon Island by now, but I can at least make sure that doesn't happen to you again."
"Awww. You'll cut off his dick for me?" Tuff sniffled. "I don't care what Chicken says, you're a great friend."
"I … well, as tempting as that sounds, I actually had something else in mind. Come on, let's get you cleaned up."
Hiccup's eyes were full of questions as he kissed Astrid's cheek in greeting.
"Hey babe," she grinned, fingers still working deftly.
"Hey, Astrid. Tuff. Sooo, what's going on?"
"You wouldn't want to know," Astrid sang. "Grab a strand and do what I do, it's kind of relaxing."
Hiccup glanced again at Tuff, who was leaning his back against Astrid's legs, eyes half-closed in contentment and gently stroking Chicken's feathers as the bird snoozed in his lap. He shrugged and picked up a thick strand of blond hair, plaiting it like Astrid was doing. She wove a large bead in her current section.
"Think of the bright side," she remarked to Tuffnut. "At least Fishlegs hasn't done it."
"Like I would have felt his," Tuff snorted, eyes still closed. "He tends to sneak up on me with surprise poetry instead. Not half as bad as Snotlout's 'poetry'."
"More like a sonnet, I bet."
"Actually, about the size of a pun."
"Ouch!" Astrid laughed, tying another knot.
Wisely, Hiccup just didn't ask.