Screwing Up Things: Akatsuki?

Okay, first i'd like to say I AM NOT finished the original "Screwing Up Things". I just thought of this while eating fish sticks.

Disclaimer: I, do not, and will never will own Naruto.

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Prolog: An Angry Cosplayer Makes A Deadly Cosplayer

I'm currently on my way to a anime convention. I arrived all high and mighty with my Itachi cosplay. I had a evil idea. An idea so evil...that...that...evil isn't evil enough! I was going to find a Sasuke cosplayer and poke him in the forehead. Then, I'm going to laugh my ass off.

Seeing my prey, I slowly walk up to the cosplayer. "What's up?" I asked causally. "Hn." Did this dude really have to be that in character? "Oh? Wanna be all in character and stuff?!Then I guess...you won't mind me doing this," I poked his fore head and laughed at his face.

His face turned into a full-out glare. To be honest, it was creeping the fuck outta me. "Uh..." I slowly went to go find my friend who was cosplayed as Kisame. "Dude, guess what I just did?" I said excitedly. "Yes...Itachi, what did you do that was so amusing?" I noticed the humor in when he said "Itachi."

"I poked a Sasuke cosplayer in the forehead..." I laughed. He just simply shook his head, "That kind of shit gets you jumped." I frowned, "My fish-buddy will save me..." I looked at his face. It was blank. "Right...?" He smirked down at me. "I'll be there to take a video of you getting your ass whooped and post it on youtube."

"Whatever. Let's go find a Pein cosplayer and kick him in the balls!" Wait... "On second thought, that might not be a good idea." I laughed.

"Whew, that was fun." I laughed again. "Kisame" laughed with me. To get to our car, we had to walk through an ally. Bad. Fucking. Idea. The Sasuke I poked in the head earlier had a bat in his hand, a mean, big, scary, Madara stood over us. Damn that dude was tall.

"You said I wasn't Tobi? Madara is Tobi!" Madara hissed. Is he really that mad just because I said Obito was under that mask? I mean, I understand the whole Sasuke thing...but dude...

My thoughts were interrupted when Sasuke swung that METAL bat at my head. I let out the loudest-girliest scream I could sum up. He then stuffed what I think was a sock into my mouth. I looked over to my friend, who was glaring at me in the same state.

It only took one more swing to my skull until i slipped into sweet, sweet, death.

Before i slipped into darkness, I saw my friend smirking slightly, as he too, got one last swing to the head before dying limply.

"We should kill the bitches."

I'm dead?! Holly fuck! Maybe...

I suddenly felt warmth going threw my body. And slight control of my limbs.

Am...I...really...dead?

I felt a huge pump in my chest.

A heart beat.

I slowly open my eye lids, waiting to see a blind light. Instead, I was greeted by a dark, dim lighted room.

I tried to move my limbs, only to discover I'm chained up to a wall.

I kept trying to wiggle my way out, it only made sounds, why'd I have to be in hell?!

The door, creaked open to show me two figures...

I squinted my eyes to get a better look at them.

Oh fuck...

Kisame and Itachi stood in front of me.

"How did you get into base, girl?" Kisame asked, raising an eyebrow. Girl? He must be mistaken...I lowered my head to see I had about D-cupped breast. "Answer." Kisame said.

"..." I still had to think out things...why is two really good cosplayers in front of me? Why the hell I'm I a girl with huge breast?

Itachi let out a irritated sigh as he walked up to me. He lifted up my head by placing a finger on my chin. I couldn't help but to look into his eyes...so...

I lost my train of though-

"She knows nothing. We should ask leader what should we do with her." Itachi said turning to Kisame.

"I already know a good reason for her to stay..." Kisame smirked as he eyed me up and down.

What the fuck just happened?

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