A/N: I own nothing that's copyrighted to JK Rowling or to The Feeling.
"Sewn"
Give me the song and I'll sing it like I mean it
You're humming absentmindedly. That hardly ever happens.
Give me the words and I'll say them like I mean it
"Hello, Harry!" you say brightly. "I missed you." Harry looks up from the table.
"Hello," he replies politely, lacking enthusiasm.
'Cause you got my heart in a headlock
He looked so forlorn and alone, that for a moment you wouldn't mind forgetting everything and taking him into your arms and whispering that everything would be all right. But, of course, you have something to do, an ulterior motive. Wishing you didn't have one, wishing that you actually were just there to be a good person and help a friend doesn't make it go away.
You stopped the blood and made my head soft
But he's so -
And God knows
What would your father say?
He stands up, refusing to look you in the eye. You walk over, and tilt his face to yours. Something in those bright eyes tells you his story, of perpetual hope and disappointment, his heart being recycled over and over, and that even so; he's hoping you'll be the one. Wishing forever. Such expectations!
You got me sewn
Your father had expectations. Something in you has to bring up your father even when you're here, holding him. So you decide.
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah
Not listening.
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah
You go to open the window. "Are you sure it's safe?" he asks, hands loosely clasped in front of him.
Danny boy, don't be afraid, to shake that ass, and misbehave
You step back. "What do you mean?"
Danny boy, I know you got time, but what are you waiting for,
"Well," he says, starting to blush. "I don't know."
Anyway the dust may just blow away, if you wait for a windy day
Patience. "I won't open it if you don't want me to."
But you may find the chance has past you by.
He sits, and motions for you to sit next to him on the sofa.
I can't do the walk
He snuggles closer. "Did you really miss me?"
I can't do the talk
"Of course," you say, and kiss his forehead.
I can't be your friend
"Thank you so much for being here," he says into your collarbone, driving you crazy. The warm breath, and the ghost of his lips moving over your skin…unfortunately, you can't do anything but pull him closer.
"No problem," you say.
Unless I pretend
So give me the song and I'll sing it like I mean it
He's humming this time.
So give me the words and I'll say them like I mean it
"I'm tired," you say, standing up and stretching.
'Cause you got my heart in a headlock
"Of me?" he asks, only half-joking.
You stopped the blood and made my head soft
"Of course not. How could I ever be?" You can't seem to make yourself sit back down on the couch.
And God knows
You catch a glimpse of yourself in the rain-streaked window, and have to close your eyes. They say you look like your father, all the time, all the time.
You got me sewn
You can't sit, you can't stand, you can't watch, so you pace.
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah
There's just the sound of the wind lightly blowing, of the rain hushing the world to grey. And it's not a sound, but Harry's eyes are following you as you take restless steps in front of him.
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah
Danny boy, don't be a fool
"Do you want something?" Harry asks, standing up.
"Depends," you say slowly, directing a smouldering gaze at him.
Take upon to break a rule
He blushes again and ducks his head. "A drink. What do you want?"
Danny boy you're looking so low
"What do you have?" you join him in his small kitchen.
You looking like the dead grown old
He's leaning into the fridge as though he were a fifty-year old mother with a pained back. You sit, finally, on a chair, and tilt your head back.
"I know," you say, and stand up abruptly. "Let's go for a walk!" The rain is louder now, a metronome keeping time of your conversation.
Anyway the blues just may wash away, if you wait for a rainy day
He doesn't even look up. "It's raining, Draco."
So? You want to say. But you know he's right without meaning to be. You know the only reason you want to go out of the flat is because, then, walking together -
But you may find, the chance has past you by
You can look like what you forever wished to be but never would be.
I can't do the walk
"I'm sorry," he says when he sees and thoroughly misinterprets your face.
I can't do the talk
"It's fine," you sigh, and look away. You can't. You just can't watch his eyes imploring at you to accept this, this way of life.
Of course, that's not his intention. But you can choose to misconstrue this action.
"Draco…" he puts a hand on yours.
I can't be your friend
You let his warmth seep into you for a moment; no more. Then you shake him off.
Unless I pretend
"It's fine," you repeat. "I just don't know what's gotten into me today."
Liar. You know perfectly well – but it's not just today. It's everyday, a feeling lovingly abused and recycled.
He is silent.
So give me the song and I'll sing it like I mean it
"Harry?" you say tentatively. Somehow you've imagined this moment. He's looking at you like he doesn't know what he wants, twisting his hands into each other.
"Thank you for coming," he says, and the genuine appreciation sounds like music in your ears.
So give me the words and I'll say them like I mean it
"I love you," you say. Blandly. With no emotion, none of the heartbreak you know that's coming. You shouldn't have said anything, you should have left it for a less awkward day…but what day wasn't awkward? This was the ultimate betrayal.
'Cause you got my heart in a headlock
He doesn't exactly gasp, but his lips part in surprise, and his hands freeze in mid-fidget. You take his fragile shoulders into your hands, and he stares straight into your core. It almost hurts to stand there, but you draw closer, slowly, slowly, until your lips are a hair's breadth apart. His eyes are fluttering closed, the romanticist.
You stopped the blood and made my head soft
But suddenly, you are terrified. What if you don't do it right? What if he just wants a taste then rejects you? Your heart is his, but what will he do with it? Your inadequacy and insignificance compared to him engulf you, and you don't know what to do. Should you throw the world away and yourself headlong into hell and kiss him? Or…
He moves forward. Such a vast hair's breadth! Your eyes are wide -
'Cause you got my heart in a headlock
You love him for moments like these…no one else…
You stopped the blood and made my head soft
You hesitate, then, smiling against his lips, close your eyes too.
Made my head soft
You're blind.
Made my head soft
Blindly in love.
Made my head soft
Blindly committing.
Made my head soft
Yeah, yeah, yeah