AN Happy (early, holy crap!) Birthday StarWars-Freak 8D
Trace
Love
He doesn't know how she convinced him to work on repairs for The Millennium Falcon with her father, and just her father, but he is brave enough to spend some alone time with Han Solo. The older man was surprisingly polite without the presence of his wife elbowing him into the cordiality. Even attempting small talk as they discussed the mechanics behind Chiss clawcrafts.
He made sure to consistently answer politely, handing the seasoned Captain a hydrospanner when he asked.
They were just about done fine-tuning the coolant line when Han set down the tool, looked over his shoulder and said, "If you hurt her, I'll kill you. If you step out of line, for even a second-" the threat hung in the air as brandy eyes stared him down.
Jagged gave a controlled nod.
A long stretch of silence occurred, before Han systematically picked up the hydrospanner and went back to work. With a smirk on his face he asked, "…So how's your old man?"
Jagged could only return the expression, "Very well, perhaps you should visit him. My father enjoys the company of old friends."
Han's smirk grew, "I see Jaina's sarcasm is spreading."
He takes that as a compliment, and he's sure that's how Han meant it.
Beauty
Jaina's beauty belongs to Leia, and for any other daughter it would be the other way around. But not for Jaina, who never seemed to have time for things like that. Who always wore a flight suit instead of a ball gown, who took apart hyper drives instead of styling her hair. Jagged can tell when Leia is around her daughter, because despite her bullheaded attitude Jaina's smirk fades from her face into a polished smile, her shoulders draw back and her spine becomes a little straighter. Her chin tilts up, just a little.
It's ruined when the Princess says something Jaina disagrees with, which is usually sooner rather than later with the Solo women, and automatically her face is twisted into a scowl, her arms crossed over her chest and a hip popping out in defiance.
This, he thinks, is less fitting for a Princess and more suited towards a Goddess.
Smile
He doesn't get to see her smile often. His analytical mind can notice the difference between the trademark Solo smirk, the diplomatic grin of the Organa house, and a lilt that is all her own, the barest tugging of the corners of her mouth.
Despite everything that's happened, Jagged Fel only sees her smile around her twin. Perhaps the rumors are true about the pair of siblings, of a force bond that he doesn't quite understand that allows them to get under each other's skin in a way that his guarded manner could never fathom allowing.
But Jaina smiles with Jacen.
Perhaps that is too liberal of a term for it, as it's more of a slight strain between her usually chapped lips, a tug of the eyebrow or the roll of the eyes. But Jagged has spent enough time not being personally aware of his emotions to be spectacularly aware of it in other people.
Jagged remembers the pointless jokes, remembers unintentionally hearing them over a commlink between the Solo twins when Jaina received messages from her brother.
"Which side of the Ewok has the most fur?"
"Jacen, you have to know I know the punch line-"
"-the outside."
And there it is, and Jagged is not looking at it because there is something in it that makes him feel like he is intruding. He forces his eyes to slide away from her face and his feet to take measured, polished steps down the hall.
When he finds her beaten on the ground, years later, with a familiar tousled brown head of hair in her lap, Jagged's first thought is that Jaina's real smile is gone forever now, and he takes the loss quite personally.
Heart
One person, and one person only, has ever touched Jaina's heart completely and irrevocably.
He is no stranger to losing family, but there is something foreign about the way her eyes darken and her fingers curl into a fist when she hears that one person's name.
Anakin Solo has left a hole in her, and Jagged is certain that no one will ever be able to fill it.
He finds himself wanting to try.
Passion
From Jagged's experience, no one has ever managed to get under Jaina Solo's skin like Kyp Durron. The two were partners, or at least something similar to that level, but the fact that their personalities were so similar occasionally caused a remarkable loss of composure.
All it would take was one word from the Jedi Master and Jaina was riled up, livid and ready to argue. Sometimes, if it was a particularly rough day in the flight simulators, or Kyp Durron pushed the boundaries of Master and Apprentice too far, Jaina would yell, her face not even centimeters away from his, mouths almost touching.
Kyp was never afraid to yell back.
And no matter how much he grew to respect and even like the Jedi Master, there will always be a small part of Jagged that remembers the heated exchanges and resents him for it.
Life
She places her life in danger every time she accepts a mission from the High Council. Yet she does so with no reservations, committing herself to a cause that will never give her rest, a blade chipping away at the universe.
He understands of course, no one could understand the weight of duty or orders better than the son of Soontir Fel.
But still he fears that one day, The Sword will take a mission that she knows she will not come back from.
Trust
Zekk is a good man.
Things have been uneasy between the three of them since the Dark Nest incident, but the former "vent crawler" as Han usually called him, has several admirable qualities. He is staunchly loyal to his ideals, something Jag can respect. He is even more loyal to Jaina, which is something Jag does respect. She trusts the Jedi Knight almost implicitly, something that can only be expected after sharing a mind.
They can still finish each others' sentences.
But perhaps what Jaina wants isn't a good man, and he allows himself to hope.
Respect
One sharp look from Mara Jade Skywalker is enough to make Jaina bite her tongue and bow her head. Her former Master is the only one who has this sort of control over the Sword of the Jedi, and both women know and acknowledge it.
Jag thinks that it's better this way, as he wouldn't know what to do if he gave orders and there wasn't someone there to argue them for twenty minutes.
Friendship
Jaina is his best friend, although he is certain she wouldn't say the same. He knows that she values his friendship. He also knows that if she were ever asked for the identity of her closest friend, her first response would immediately be the Wookie who has been by her side since her childhood training at the Jedi Academy.
He has a million and one reasons to hate her best friend, and most of them would be justified. It was, no matter how inadvertent, the Wookie's fault for Jagged being expelled from not only his family, but the Chiss military. The consequences of the actions at Lowbacca's expense put the Fels on the verge of financial ruin and dishonored Jagged's reputation.
But Jagged Fel would not have gone to Luke Skywalker at the Jedi Academy, would not have had time to take a personal interest in hunting down Alema Rar. Jagged Fel would not have had the availability to form a trio alongside Zekk and Lowbacca's best friend. Jagged Fel never would have been able to retain a friendship with Jaina Solo.
Lowbacca is the reason he is Jag, and not Jagged Fel, and because of that he has a million and two reasons to be thankful for him.
Head
Despite the war, despite the loss, despite even joining a hive of insects, her mind is still her own. And even though this has caused him a lot of trouble over the years, he wouldn't want it any other way.
Choice
She's bleeding, her cheek is flayed open and her eyes are unfocused. He breathes. She moves her chapped lips numbly, and the end stays with him.
"-for getting here first. Glad it was…you."
He grips her hand tighter.
There isn't much of her that belongs to him, but what he gets, he's going to keep.