A/N: Hello, fellow readers!
Argh, this turns out to be more difficult to write than I thought.
So, first of all, this is NOT a Doctor Who fanfiction, so sorry in advance if you thought that you found something new to read. Well, it is actually something new to read, but not in the way you might think.
Let me explain: I'm an aspiring writer and I'm working on my first book. Now, the thing is, I'm not quite ready yet to show the first chapters to my friends and family because most of the time, I feel very insecure about my writing. I'm quite insecure about this project (I'm also not quite ready yet to call it a book even though I did so a few lines ago..., nevermind, what I mean is that I don't know yet where I'm going with it) and that's why I decided to post the second chapter online. Now, the project is called The (not so) fantastic life of Jonathan Parker and it's about a 17-year-old boy who is not really self-confident and who thinks too much and who likes to ramble about things that other people aren't interested in and who sometimes likes fictional people more than real people (so basically we're talking about a boy version of myself). The reason I started this project is because sometimes, I need to get it out. Everything I think about, everything I dream about, just everything (very exaggerated sometimes though, as the melodramatic side of me tends to punch the rational side in the face every so often). So, it's basically a diary which makes the whole thing quite personal which is why I'm not ready yet to show it to anyone in real life. It's easier for me to post it on here because I can hide behind my username which gives no clue about my name or my whereabouts whatsoever. I would really, truly, appreciate if you could read this chapter and tell me what you think because I really need the feedback; as I said before, I'm really insecure about it, because I like it, but I'm not sure if other people will like it, too.
I will delete this at one time or another, because it doesn't fit in with the category. I chose the Doctor Who category because I really, really, love Doctor Who and because doesn't really provide a category for stories that are not fanfiction. Also, this way, lots of people can see and read it.
I know how annoying it can be when someone asks for reviews and stuff, so I'm just saying it once: please review, it would really, really help me out!
As I said before, I've decided to upload the second chapter/entry because I'm not happy with the first chapter/entry as it is now.
Another thing before you (hopefully) read the chapter, I'm not a native speaker and I don't have a beta so there may be some errors. If there are, please let me know as it helps to improve my writing.
So, if you read this, lots and lots and lots of thanks!
Entry #2: Reality
Reality sucks.
Really, it does. You know when you're watching a movie or an advert or a Youtube video or an episode of your favourite TV show or whatever, and there's someone who's running along a street and it looks so easy and not exhausting at all and the person is drop dead gorgeous and you think 'Look, if I wanted I could do that, too' and suddenly you're lit with the desire to do it, to run and run and run and never stop and you picture headliners in your head along the lines of 'The new Forrest Gump: Teenagers runs without stopping' and you see yourself holding a Guinness World Record diploma and you're famous and all your problems disappear because you're so healthy and gorgeous and everything's just perfect and you are the happiest person alive just because you ran and ran and ran without stopping. I get that once in a while, too. I'd watch a movie and suddenly I'd have that flaming desire to just do something and then I'd put on my sneakers and some sports clothes and I'd go to my mum and say 'Mum, I'm going to run now and I'll never ever stop and I'll become famous and healthy and rich' and she'd just look at me with an amused smile playing on her lips and she'd nod. But then, when I'd be out on the streets and running, I'd realise that life just isn't that easy and after mere 5 minutes I'd be panting like an 80-year-old chain smoker who lost one lung due to lung cancer but keeps on smoking anyway because he simply doesn't give a shit and I'd crawl home defeated and drag myself to my hammock where I'd grab my worn copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows and think about how magical my life would be if it all were true.
So yeah, reality sucks. Or do all the movies and adverts and Youtube videos and TV show episodes suck? No; they don't. For instance, the Batman trilogy by Christopher Nolan. Yes, I might've cried and winced during The Dark Knight Rises and yes, my best friend might've been slightly embarrassed but who cares? Anyway, if you've never seen any of those films, then shame on you. Go watch them now! I mean it, put the book down and watch it. Right, for the people who are still reading and have seen the Batman trilogy… you are awesome. Wow, I digressed quite a bit again, didn't I? I warned you, ha ha. I was blabbering on about reality and then the next second, I'm plugging the Batman trilogy. Whoops. I swear though, I don't get paid for this. But seriously, watch it. You'll thank me.
Anyway, the thing about reality is that society decides what's real and what's not. If you're obsessed with fictional characters and think of them as friends, people will point and laugh at you. Suddenly, you're mad but most of all you're a sad excuse for a human being, because someone who has more fictional than real friends must be a miserable nutter. It's the same when people refer to their beloved cat as their best friend: 'Oh, you refer to your cat as your best friend, you must have no real friends then, you poor, sad squirt'. And then they pity you. That's the worst: the pity.
But what people don't realise is that fictional characters are indeed real. They make an impact on us, they change us, they challenge us to think, they make us fall in love with their flaws.
Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore once made a remark to Harry Potter which I'll never forget. Attention, spoilers: I'm referring to the scene in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (you may have noticed that this is the second time I mention this book; that series may or may not be my whole life basically), where Harry Potter, after dying by Voldemort's hand, reunites with the in-imagination-not-so-quite-dead Dumbledore in a mind palace of sorts which , according to Harry, looks like Kings Cross Station. Here, Dumbledore finally reveals everything to Harry (I'm not writing a summary here, read the book and you'll understand) and as they part, Harry asks one final question: "'Tell me one last thing,' said Harry. 'Is this real? Or has this been happening inside my head?'". And the ever so wise Dumbledore replies: "'Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?'".
Do you get my point now? Our mind is so very powerful and the fact that we can control it and imagine things makes them real in some sense. So if I'm lying in bed after an embarrassing and hurtful day at school and imagining having a conversation with Sherlock (because seriously, he's awesome), then that conversation is in some way real, even though he's fictional and he'd probably think I'm dead boring and stupid. It is real because I feel better afterwards and for some minutes I could bask in the glory of living at 221b Baker Street and solving crimes.
It's real because I feel confident. It's real because I finally, finally feel at home.