Notes: These were originally written for a challenge on another site. The title is from the Byron poem of the same name. Naturally, the characters here belong to George Lucas; I'm just doing this for fun, and I'm not making any money off of it.
--beginnings--
She had never noticed how he always brushed aside questions about his past, or how his demeanor changed subtly when she talked about her family or training. She'd never thought to wonder how he had so much luck in finding things, or to ask herself if his life was really as carefree as it seemed. All she saw was a friend, a confident survivor with a freedom she envied.
Later she would piece everything together and see the beginnings of what followed. But she wouldn't understand until it was already too late, and for that, she would always blame herself.
--middles--
Not even her mother believed that Zekk was really in trouble. Jaina tried to convince anyone who would listen, but it didn't matter. None of the adults thought a transient street rat was important enough to be kidnapped.
Jaina moved closer to the balcony railing and let the fleeting wind dry her tears. Maybe she'd done something that drove him away. Maybe he wasn't coming back. She could still sense him, but only faintly, as if he were hiding, or shielded somehow.
"Zekk, where are you? What happened?" she whispered.
Every night she looked up at the stars and wondered.
--ends--
There was no trace of the boy she'd known in his eyes. The verdant fire that had once blazed in them was gone, leaving only a desperate vacancy that chilled her.
Ruby blade locked with amethyst as empty emerald eyes bored into hers. His lightsaber hissed malevolently, attacking her senses as well as her body. With a piercing clarity, she realized that there was only one way to tell if there was anything left of her friend. She threw down her lightsaber.
Crimson blade hovered and then made its decision. A pale hand reached for hers as their world exploded.
--first--
"What do you want to do when you grow up, Zekk?"
"Maybe I'll keep scavenging. I'm good at it."
"But is that what you want? You could do anything you want, you know."
"Not everyone has a future like you, Jaina."
She had gotten angry then, and given him a lecture he'd never forgotten. It was the first time he realized that she truly believed in him, and suddenly nothing was more important than being worthy of her trust. But in trying, he'd only proved just how unworthy he was.
Even in his despair, Zekk could still appreciate the irony.
--last--
Darkest nightmares dissolved at her approach. Fierce, cleansing innocence burned away his fever dreams and brought him back to consciousness. The unwavering acceptance, stubborn belief, and fiery, heedless joy flooded over him a few seconds later.
Jaina.
He didn't deserve this. Even her Force presence was more contact than he should ever be allowed.
He quickly feigned sleep as she entered the room, not able to face her. She used to look at him as if he were the only other person in the world, as if he mattered.
He wondered if she'd ever look at him that way again.