Much Ado About WTF?
By: eXnay
Disclaimer: I do not own any IGPX characters for if I did Fantine would have ran her robot off the track and been blown up to bits, Liz, Amy, and Yuri would all be huge yaoi fans like they're gonna' be in this fic, River would be lusting after Takeshi non-stop, and Alex and Takeshi would have forgotten completely about Fantine's funeral because they were making sweet, sweet love on Alex's kitchen table all night long. I don't think anyone would want that so it's good that I don't own it then.
Warnings: Amy's OOC, but then again so am I when I read yaoi manga. Also, underage girls looking at stuff they shouldn't. Don't take this story too seriously, it's just meant to be funny.
Author's Note: I hope to get some feedback unlike my other story. I'm a new author so I need to know what I'm doing right and wrong. Anyways enjoy and please drop a review!
Chapter 1: Yaoi Can Be A Dangerous Thing
Amy scratched Luca as she stared at a graphic novel. She stopped scratching the cat much to Luca's despair to quickly turn the page. Her eyes darted across the page and she closed the manga finished with it. "Wow," she said. "That is so romantic. Even though that cold-hearted bastard Yuki pushed him away, Shuichi would never let go and he stayed with him even though Yuki did such mean things to him."
Amy sighed, lost in thought. "And there was a few scenes with boy on boy action that made me feel so warm inside." She giggled as she went through the piles of Gravitation manga, on her bed, looking for volume two and four and staring at the non-descriptive sex scenes. "I have to get more yaoi manga!" she announced.
She jumped from her bed, disturbing Luca who just meowed in protest, and made her way out of her room. She put on her shoes and left. Amy begin to walk to the mall which had a bookstore where she could get more yaoi manga. When she made it to the mall, she was walking straight to the bookstore, when she accidentally bumped into someone and they dropped their bag. "Oh sorry!" Amy's voice and another female's voice rang out. They both stopped to look at one another. "Oh!" they both said at once as realization hit them.
"You're Takeshi's little sister, Yuri," Amy stated.
"Yeah, and you're Amy," Yuri said.
"I'm really sorry about that," said Amy as she bent down to pick up the bag for Yuri. The bag had lost some of its contents and she glimpsed the graphic novels. Loveless, it read on them. Amy stared shocked. "Those are yaoi manga." she thought and then looked up at Yuri, who had a blush on her face. "You read shounen ai?" Amy asked even though it was an obvious question.
Yuri blushed even harder. "Yes," she answered. "But there's nothing wrong with that!"she snapped.
"Oh no, not at all. I think its wonderful," Amy said with sparkling eyes. "I came down here to get yaoi manga myself, actually."
"Really?" Yuri asked. "It's the greatest, huh?"
"It sure is," Amy said dreamily. They both sat there in their own little dazes for a while, thinking about what most shounen ai fans do, which is guys on top of guys 24/7. Did I forget to mention those guys are really hot guys? Well, if you're reading this story, you know what I'm talking about.
"So, anyway," Yuri broke the silence after clearing her head of the unhealthy thoughts. "What yaoi have you read?"
Amy thought about it as she put her arm around Yuri. "Let me read all of your Loveless volumes and I'll let you see," Amy answered. They began to walk out of the mall together.
Yuri shifted through some of the manga Amy was showing her at her house. They had to take a detour to Amy's to retrieve her shounen ai manga but now they were here and looking through all the wonderful pretty graphic volumes full of guys making out.
"Wow!"Yuri said. "You have quite a few yaoi mangas, although my friend has way more than you." Amy was taken aback by this but let Yuri look nonetheless. Amy had pretty much every volume there was to each story she owned such as Gravitation's complete set, (excluding doujinshi, for she isn't old enough.) Our Kingdom, Let Dai, volumes 1-6 of Fake, and Yellow. She had more but for this story I can't go through them all. Let's just say our innocent Amy has been turned into a slash-obsessed perv.
Yuri stopped shifting and suggested, "You can read the Loveless, if I can read all of these."
"Sure," Amy agreed. They set on reading. Amy finished way before Yuri but Yuri stopped anyways to talk with her. "So, what do you think so far?" Amy asked.
"They're all so great!" Yuri cheered. "Too bad though, most of these manga give very few descriptive scenes." She sighed.
"I know," Amy said. "It sucks because we're not 18! If we were, we'd be able to get dirtier manga."
Yuri laughed. "You're just like my friend." She said. "Although, she did teach me something."
"She taught you what?" Amy asked not actually interested.
"This," said Yuri as she walked over to the computer in her room. Yuri turned on her computer and when it was at the main page, she clicked on the internet. She went to some download site and logged on. "I'm registered as an 18-year old!" Yuri announced gleefully. (A/N: Okay, don't act like any of you haven't done it when you were underage.)
Amy got up and began to stare at the screen. Yuri began to download some anime, such as "Ai no Kusabi," and even "Level C." Both of these you had to be 18 or over to watch but nothing usually stopped a girl from getting a hold of her boy on boy moments.
Once they were done with watching the anime they sat together, blushing. "Wow," Amy said. "Guys have a lot of fun without us."
"Yeah, I guess so," Yuri answered.
"We still need to get more descriptive yaoi manga, though," said Amy.
"Yes, but I wonder how," Yuri thought out loud.
"You think maybe we can trick an adult into getting us some?" Amy asked.
"But what adult could we do that to?" Yuri questioned. "I know Mom wouldn't fall for it."
"Ms. Satomi," answered Amy.
They left the house not long after that, heading off to find Ms. Satomi.
When they found her, they ended up dragging her off to the mall and sending her on her merry way into the bookstore. They gave her notes off the books she should get, which of course were pointless yaoi mangas such as Brother, Art of Loving, and Desire. Ms. Satomi just could not see why they did not go and buy these stupid books themselves, although if she did, this story would not be as much fun. Therefore, she got the graphic novels and headed out the bookstore.
"So, why the hell did you send me in there, Amy?" Michiru asked. "And why did that guy seem so concerned if I was 18 or not?"
Amy thought about this, "Maybe he wondered if you were too young to date because he didn't want to look like a pedophile asking you out," she answered.
"Yeah, I'm so sure," Michiru said. "What's in these books, anyways?"
She begin to flip through one of them. "Oh my God!" she said. "Amy!"
Amy snatched the bag from her and held out her hand for the book Michiru was holding. "Hand it over!" She said.
"Amy, I thought you were innocent," Michiru looked at the two young girls in surprise. "I didn't know you like dirty stories."
"Not just any dirty stories!" Yuri said.
"Yeah! Shounen ai stories," Amy corrected her.
Michiru still looked surprised. She looked down at the book she was holding and began to flip through it again. Yes, the characters were certainly guys. And she guessed it wasn't so bad. I mean the characters were kind of cute.
"Ladies! Today we hold the first yaoi fan meeting for those involved in the IGPX.
Our three members are Michiru Satomi, Yuri Jin, and me, Amy Stapleton. Our mission today, is to attempt to recruit Liz Ricarro." Amy announced.
"Did Liz say she wanted to join?" Yuri asked. "She doesn't seem to be big on shounen ai."
Amy waved it away. "Every girl is a shounen ai girl at heart." She answered. "If you don't believe me, look at Ms. Satomi."
Yuri glanced at Michiru who just stared at her hands ashamed that she was helping two underage girls get a hold of dirty yaoi manga. Yuri felt sorry for Michiru. Amy was proud of her.
They set off to find Liz, which she was in the training room, so it wasn't hard. "Hey, Liz," Amy said.
Liz looked up. "Hey Amy, Ms. Satomi, and Yuri?"
"Liz, do you like yaoi?" Amy asked getting straight to the point.
"What?" Liz looked at her shocked. "What kind of question is that?"
"It's just what it is," Amy answered. "Do you like boy on boy action? Do you sometimes wish that even though they're rivals, Daisuke and Satoshi would just get it on, already? Or do you prefer brotherly love and just wish Kaoru and Hikaru would give in to their emotions and give us a good show? Or do you like younger guys, usually under 18 screwing guys much older than them like the student and the teacher in Passion?" Liz just looked stunned. Amy was drawing blanks. "Okay," Amy said. "Have you ever wished that Zero and Kaname were together in Vampire Knight instead of Kaname always lusting after Yuki? Or that the girls from Fanfiction . Net would write a decent M-rated fic about Syaoran and Fai for once, instead of always doing Fai and Kurogane becausewho says Syaoran should always have to be coupled with Sakura and Fai with Kurogane. I think that Syaoran and Fai make a decent coupling and a God forsaken change for once from the usual!(A/N: Yeah!)
Liz just looked at Michiru. "What the hell is going on?" She asked. "Who the fuck turned her into a slash freak?"
Michiru just shook her head. "I don't know and she tricked me into getting her over-age graphic novels." She sniffed.
"Really?" Liz said shocked. She stared at Amy. "Our innocent Amy has over-age guy on guy manga?" There was a long pause and then Liz said, "Can I see?"
"Today, is our second yaoi meeting for those involved in the IGPX. Our members are Michiru Satomi, Yuri Jin, Liz Ricarro and me, Amy Stapleton." Amy announced. "Now, today, Ms. Satomi will go online and order us a copy of the game, "Enzai: Falsely Accused" while we go and download the OVAs. Then we'll regroup and come up with a plan on how to see more boy on boy action, because we're running out of shounen ai manga and anime to watch."
Liz raised her hand. "Yes, Liz." said Amy.
Liz asked, "What are we going to do once we run out of yaoi to look at?"
"I haven't thought about it," said Amy. "Although that will be a sad day." She sighed.
"Yeah," agreed Yuri. "I wish my big brother was gay. That way, I could just follow him around with all his gay dates and stuff, and I wouldn't need yaoi manga for I'd have the real thing at home."
Some might say it was a mistake on Yuri's part. Others might say it was the best idea ever. All that is known is that she mentioned it in front of Amy and well, after reading yaoi manga watching shounen ai anime all day, and eagerly waiting her future videogame, "Enzai," Amy's head was solely on guys getting it on. The lightbulb had just went on over her head and when Liz noticed it she panicked. "Amy," she said sternly. "No." But the wheels were already turning inside the young girl's head and they could not be stopped. Yes, yaoi could be a dangerous thing.
"Okay, it's time to begin Operation: Make Takeshi Jin Gay." Amy announced to the group of girls. "First, we need to decide what man Takeshi will become uke to."
"I have a question," Liz interrupted her. "Why does Takeshi have to be uke?"
"I don't know, but it's usually the main character of the story who is the uke," said Amy. And have you seen "Enzai," yet? In the game he doesn't, but when they change Guys' look in the animeversion, he kind of looks like Takeshi. Beautiful amber eyes and dark hair, oh and get this! Guys is only 14, one year younger than Takeshi. He's also uke to every guy, by the way," Liz seemed interested and then nodded, agreeing.
"Anyways, we can do the sometimes famous rivalry yaoi and make Takeshi fall in love with his rival, River or Cunningham. Since Takeshi does not have a brother, we can't do incest. Amy said. "Next in line, would be for Takeshi to go with someone over 18. Let's see, there's Cunningham again, and there's Mark, Andrei,-------"
"Cunningham will do fine!" Ms. Satomi snapped.
"Great!" squealed Amy. "Then we're set. It's time, ladies, for us to begin Operation: Make Takeshi Fall in Love With Alex Cunningham."
The group nodded but only Yuri and Amy had very much enthusiasm. Liz and Michiru just knew that they were in for a long ride. And Takeshi and Alex were not going to be happy.
A/N: Okay, that's the end of the first chapter. I hope you all enjoyed it. Please review if you want this story to continue into a Takeshi x Cunningham! And if you want me to update faster and you're a fan of Tsubasa, then write a long story, not a oneshot, of Syaoran and Fai as the coupling and e-mail me to tell me that you did and what the story is called. As a result, you will find this story updates a lot faster. Anyways, auf wiedersehen!