Zanarkand's Double Feature

by Lasinad

What happens when you get bored of sitting around and playing videogames in your head, listening to music from a famous movie/broadway? Or a cult classic? Probably something much more sane than this. Nothing about this fic is random, even if it seems slightly out there. Prepare yourself for humor in all it's twisted forms. And I'm not boasting either.

1. Chapter 1

Zanarkand's Double Feature

RHPS Char | FFX Char
Janet | Lulu
Brad | Wakka
Riff Raff | Jecht
Magenta | Yuna
Frank N Furter | Seymour
Rocky | Tidus
Columbia | Rikku
Eddie | Bickson
Dr. Scott | Braska
Criminologist Expert | xxxxxAuronxxxxx

It is Barthello and Donna's wedding day. Lulu seems happy, and Yuna is agitated. Donna throws the boquet to the crowd of awaiting women.
Lulu happens to be the tallest, and catches it midair (Not that she'd cheat and use Demi).
Wakka says, "Good catch, ya?"
Jecht is sweeping the church's steps, while Bickson is signing autographs.
Barthello looks at Wakka and winks. "Guess you're getting married next, no?" Not too gently, he slams a hand on Wakka's back, without reason.
"Huh? Wha-?"
Lulu comes up to Wakka and hands him the boquet. "That's what this means - We are getting married."
"Ah, man. I guess we gotta go tell Lord Braska then, huh?"
"I'm driving," Lulu says, smiling.
"No way. Last time we ended up in a hole under a tree."
"Oh, it was fun, and you know it!"
Wakka rubs the back of his head. "Ya, until that crazy queen tried to off us, ya know? I quite like my head where it is."

From left stage (huh, when did that get there), a flash bomb explodes, blinding everyone in sight. Out of the crowd who was present before, only Wakka, Lulu and Jecht remain to be seen.
Music begins to play at an increasing tempo, and Wakka finds himself unable to resist dancing.
"I wanna marry you, Janet!
If you're confused all of a sudden, then can it!
Even your record came clean when I ran it!
My point is, Dammit, Janet, I love you!"

Lulu, thoroughly confused, is looking at Wakka as if he's been possessed. Oh, I must be Janet. So why do I want to call him Brad?
Jecht, in the background, is sweepdancing (kinda like breakdancing, but with more mechanics involved).
After half a minute more, they board a shoopuff, and it begins to head north.

Five minutes later, the same shoopuff screams in agony, whining about a foot cramp. Annoyed, Lulu and Wakka step off the creature, who then limps off to the distance.
"Now what?" Wakka wonders aloud.

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First chapter. Expect more, since a lot of it is already written out. Please give some time, as I am uploading from a library computer. You'll find out in chapter 7 why Auron's part is crossed ;)