Please note: I don't own anything, all belongs to the BBC.
Two Angels
She'd gone. He looked into her soft brown eyes and ran his fingers through her silky brown hair. Her pale skin was cold, her delicate lips were blue. He felt his heart had shattered into a million pieces. His world had come crashing down around him. She meant the world to him, he loved her but it was too late. He felt guilty, he wanted her to still be alive, still laughing and joking. He knew she had stepped in the way to save him, he knew how she felt but he didn't listen. Now it was too late.
Harry laid alone on his bed, unable to sleep. Every time he closed his eyes all he could see was her, the loving looks he never understood, the life draining from her face, like water from a pool. He hated the silence, the gun shot echoed around in his head until it drove him insane. She admitted her love for him, she took a bullet for him. She'd always loved him but he was to foolish to see it. He wanted to hit his head against the wardrobe for being so stupid but that wouldn't bring her back. Nothing could bring her back.
He sat on a creamy, leather chair, deep in thought. He was numb with pain and sorrow, and felt as if life wasn't worth living. He couldn't give in, he had to make Selena's memories live on. Her baby was in intensive care, she had to live, her mum had to be remembered somehow. She said it herself, the father of her baby was not who she wanted it to be. He knew what she meant, she wanted him to be the father. It was up to Harry to make sure everyone knew what a kind, gentle, loving woman Selena was. It was all up to Harry.
Harry walked up the small, cobbled street to the graveyard where Selena had been buried. He dragged his feet slightly, scuffing the tops of his shoes but he didn't care. Nothing mattered anymore. He found her gravestone and placed and beautiful, delicate bunch of satin red roses on the rich green grass above where Selena was buried. He kneeled on the cold, hard earth and cried, holding a picture of her close to his broken heart.
Work was a blur when he went back. Maggie's smiling face was sad and tear-stained, she had lost her best friend. The staff were mourning, Harry had lost a woman he truly cared for, Nathan had lost the mother of his baby. The usual spark of cheeriness in the air had gone. Harry breathed in deeply, he could still almost smell her perfume. A part of him was missing, the best thing in his life had gone.
As Harry ascended up the cold, white stairs to the special care baby unit to see Selena's premature baby. He walked into the warm, welcoming room and walked over to the incubator. She laid there, under a pink, woollen blanket. She was wired up to a number of bleeping machines, each one checking her progress. Harry held her tiny, pink hand as she opened her eyes and looked straight at him, making his heart melt. She had her mother's eyes, deep and soft, full of thought and mystery. Harry could see Selena in her baby's eyes.
Maggie was outside when Harry left the SCBU. she gave him a little smile, before looking in the clear, glass window at the baby. She sat down, Harry next to her, in the waiting area before breaking down with tears. Harry comforted her gently, tears rolling down his cheeks. He thought about Selena, about the good times they had, the special moments they shared. He felt like such an idiot to let her go. He looked at Maggie, telling her everything would be ok. He knew he was lying.
Sat on the floor in the bright living room, Harry was looking through a cardboard box he had for ages under his wooden computer desk. He moved a pile of paperwork out to find an upside down, golden-rimmed frame. He picked it up and turned it over. In the frame was a picture of him and Selena, an hour before the big staff party. He wiped away a tear from his eye as he thought of how beautiful she looked that night, how much he loved her then but he was to afraid to say anything. Why didn't he never tell her how he felt?
The day was bright, warm and sunny but inside Harry a storm was raging. He wanted to run and hide, never to face the world again, but he knew he couldn't. He felt sick with worry, and sadness. He sat up, his head pounding and got dressed slowly, every muscle aching from head to toe. He had not slept properly since the funeral, he kept seeing her. In the street, at work, her adorable brown eyes looking at him longingly, her golden hair swaying in the gentle breeze. Then she was gone again and Harry came back to reality. Memories never to be lost, she needed to be remembered. Somehow.
At work, Harry was deep in paperwork when he was distracted by a knock on his office door, the office he used to share with Selena. He was informed of an suicide attempt by one of the staff. Harry's mind was racing, who could it be, who was more affected than him. He didn't want to kill himself, who could it be? Harry was suddenly worried more than ever. There was someone just as affected as him if not more. Maggie.
He rushed into the staff room, afraid of what he was going to find. Maggie, Selena's best friend, one of his close mates and a trusted, loved colleague. She couldn't be gone too. How would he cope with both of them not there. He thrust open the staff room door to see someone hanging in front of him, the room too dark to make out who it was. It couldn't be. Not her, not Maggie.
Harry sat outside and cried. Selena was murdered, her daughter was in the SCBU fighting for her life and, now Maggie. He didn't know if he could cope without her. As security wheeled the cold body out of the staff room, Harry leapt to his feet and pulled back the bright, white sheet. He couldn't believe what he saw in front of him. It wasn't Maggie. That he was glad about, but it was someone else. That someone was, Nathan.
Laying on Nathan's desk was a letter. It was from Selena, before she died, telling him that he was the father of her baby, she didn't have an abortion, she wrote she couldn't end a baby's life just because their father was the wrong man. It also said Harry is to be their godfather, and Maggie their godmother. It was clear Nathan couldn't cope with it all, that's why he took his own life. Now the little baby girl was Harry's. It was Harry's little girl holding on.
The news spread like a wild fire. Soon the whole hospital knew about Nathan committing suicide and Harry being godfather to Selena's baby. Maggie was still upset and grieving but she was ecstatic to find out Selena wanted her to be a godmother to her baby. Harry had thoughts buzzing around in his head, what was he going to call her? Leah? Hannah? Amy? None of them sounded right.
After his shift, Harry went back upstairs to the special care baby unit. He sat beside the incubator, Maggie next to him, and still tried to think of a name. He soon snapped back into reality when he heard a scared Maggie.
"No! Harry she's fitting, get someone!"
Maggie and Harry were sent outside, both afraid of losing her and neither saying a word. Harry held his breath, unable to get his head around what was happening. Why her? Why his little girl?
Mumbling could be heard from the door to the SCBU. Harry blocked out the sound, he didn't want to hear it. Maggie's gentle touch on his arm caught his attention.
"She's stable Harry. She's going to be fine."
He beamed from ear to ear for the first time since Selena died. His baby, his little angel, was going to live! That was when it hit him. He had the perfect name. Angel.
Harry went back inside the SCBU to see Angel. He held her tiny hand once more and said to her.
"My darling little girl, Angel. I have two angels now, you and your beautiful, amazing, loving, caring, kind, special mum up above us, in heaven. My two angels."
He stayed next to his daughter, holding her warm hand until he fell asleep, exhausted.
He was awoken next morning by Maggie sneezing. Unaware of where he was for a moment, Harry soon realised he had fallen asleep with his daughter, the only time he had been asleep since the incident. He looked at his smiling daughter and could have cried with happiness, rather than sorrow. Things were looking up for him, Maggie and Angel.
A week later, and Angel had been discharged and Harry was driving home, singing along to the radio. Maggie was in the back of the car, fussing over Angel and rolling her eyes at Harry's singing. He was on top of the world and even though he had lost the most important person in his life, he had Angel and that's all he could ask for. Oh, and of course Maggie, who was trying to wrap Angel in cotton wool. She was the perfect person to be a godmother.
They sat in front of the roaring fire, reading Cinderella. Harry closed the hardback book and pulled Angel onto his lap and into a gentle cuddle. He kissed her softly on her head and whispered in her ear,
"You and your mum, my two angels."