The Effects Of Ennui

By VHunter07

It had been some weeks since my friend, Mr Sherlock Holmes had been presented with a case. At least, with one 'worthy' of his mental capacity, as he would put it. The morning of the twelfth of April, found him sprawled over the sofa in a most dismal mood. For the better part of an hour he'd been intensely bemoaning the lack of ingenuity in the present criminal world. Unfortunately, having only that business with her ladyships' dog to refer to regarding the past month or so, I was forced to remain silent in the face of of his lamenting.

"I fear, Watson, that I'd even stoop so low as to accept a commission from Lady Geraldine to find that blasted poodle a second time!" Said he.

"Really Holmes, you can't expect the country to constantly be on the brink of disaster. And there area number of petty crimes and underworld goings on. Have you looked at the Times this morning? That Wescott gang has certainly been keeping Lestrade and Company busy."

Holmes gave a derisive snort. "A child with a bright, twirling object in hand could keep the Yard on active duty! The mystery of where Wescott and his band have hidden their booty from the Billingsgate Bank robbery is no mystery at all...it's childs play."

"Oh? Then why don't you give Lestrade a little assistance if it's all so simple to you? I'm certain he would be delighted." I countermanded with a definite hint of sarcasm. I had no doubt that Holmes was bluffing and truthfully hadn't the slightest notion of the answer to Lestrades' little conundrum. Yet within seconds of my challenge, Holmes had rung for Mrs Hudson and ordered her to have a note send to Scotland Yard.

"Let it read: 'Wescott loot bound to first anchor of the Mary Catherine set to sail for America first of next week. First mate the confederate. ' Yes, do have that send straight away to Inspector Lestrade, with my compliments." I received a wry smile.

"How on earth can you be so certain its' there?"

He waved me off and fell back against the sofa cushion. "Trifles! The entire world is overrun with trifles and nothing more!"

Willing my tongue to be silent, I rose to glance out over Baker Street, hoping to Providence that I should find something of interest. Anything to catch the quick eye of my despondent friend. "There's a small crowd gathered in the street, Holmes. Looks like some sort of-"

"A drunken cabby overturned his rig, did you not hear it earlier, Watson?"

"Well...we might at least see if we could do anything for the poor passenger...quite a lovely young lady, actually-"

"Oh, Watson!" He turned over to face the back of the sofa.

I sighed heavily. It was quite hopeless. Resolving myself to spend the afternoon with a completely cantankerous consulting detective, I took a seat at my writing desk. Perhaps I might draw up a few notes in between Holmes' tirades. Yet not a full minute subsequent, Holmes' muttering caught my attention.

"Hmm? Did you say something, Holmes?"

"I was just thinking, Watson."

"About how delightful it would be for some madman to rush in and perform an attempted murder?"

"Don't be ridiculous. No, about our street address."

This gave me pause. "Our street address?"

"Indeed, it is a most interesting one."

I turned back to my notes. "I never should've guessed."

"Very likely not, but it is, nevertheless. A great many fascinating connotations, indeed. For example, the exact number may be reached by the addition of five consecutive prime numbers."

"Holmes..."

"Those numbers being thirty-seven, forty-one, forty-three, forty-seven and fifty-three, naturally."

"Holmes, hadn't you better-"

"The Shu Han kingdom of China was established in 221 Anno Domini."

"Why don't you try reading a book?"

"Or, that under the Canadian Constitution, Act IV, Section 221 the official of a district loses his seat should he fail to file the proper election financing report required under that Act."

"Perhaps re-organising your tobacco ash?"

"And of course, it is a well known fact that Northern line of the underground through Hampstead is two hundred and twenty-one feet below ground level."

"Maybe you could pop down and help Mrs Hudson with her baking today..."

"Further more, Watson, were you aware that the Carthaginian chief Hasdrubal, brother-in-law of Hannibal himself died in the year 221 BC. Also, Lucius Caecilius Metellus Denter the Roman Republican Consul, defeated Hasdrubal at the celebrated Battle of Panormus which led to the first Punic War and eventually the Roman domination of Sicily. He expired in that same year. As did Berenice the Second, the Queen of Egypt, and Xenoetas the Achaean warrior who was killed in the service of....Watson, where on earth are you going?"

I had risen suddenly and grabbed my hat and stick from the rack. "Out to find a case to occupy your mind! If I hear one more fact about our address Scotland Yard will receive the commission of solving your murder!"

Holmes laughter echoed throughout the house as I reached the brilliantly sunlit street below, and I could not repress a smile of victory.

I just couldn't resist putting this up....I mean, today IS 221B Day! You were all aware of that, right?? It's a national holiday! And must be celebrated accordingly! :) Plus, I thought KaizokuShojo could use a little silliness to brighten her day after all this stupid movie mess. Don't cry please! I know just how you feel! It's awful, but you know, Holmes has withstood the test of time..I don't think any stubby-dwarfed ignoramus is going to mess him up now. Anyway, hope you're feeling better and I hope everyone enjoyed! Thanks!

P.S. Did y'all also know that there are 221 Microsoft shortcuts? But I doubt Holmes would know that one. :P

Cheers!

VHunter