Title: Paradise False
Part: 1/1
Author: Raven
Disclaimer: Yu-gi-oh is copyright of Kazuki Takahashi.
Notes: Told in the First Person.

It's strange to think that someone like me would be this blessed. I slowly wake to find Ryou sleeping beside me, looking so beautiful… Its paradise, somehow I ended up in paradise. After the pharaoh found his name again and the Items were destroyed I was expecting to live a horrid existence; that Ryou would never allow me near him. Sometime during using him as my host I grew fond of him, and oddly enough it made me hurt him more. Now with the Items I had so long sought to obtain were gone I found myself worried for the first time in a long while about what would become of me. Ryou would never want me after the abuse I put him through, so I got ready to leave… to disappear. But he stopped me, after I called him weak and useless Ryou still wanted me. Had it not been for the fact that the pharaoh was there I may have cried.

But I don't cry, or rather didn't cry. I was stone, a jagged piece of ice that no one could touch…expect Ryou. It used to anger me, that he managed to get pass some of my mental and emotionally walls that I had built for me. I needed no one and nothing but power and my hate. Looking back I see the truth, that I was nothing more than a bitter hurt child afraid of losing someone again. But could you blame me? Everyone I ever knew was brutally murdered in front of me; I have rights to have issues. I think that's what made me hurt all those around Ryou, because I wanted someone else to feel like I did. Alone, lost, bitter and angry. But Ryou never became bitter or angry, that's just not how he is. I despised and yet loved him for it; despised because he still found some reason to smile and not give into despair, loved him for having strength that I didn't have.

Ryou stirred a bit in his sleep and I gently get out of his bed. He doesn't know that once he's asleep I crawl in bed with him, many of my walls have fallen because of him but I hold onto that last wall simply out of habit. I'm not ready to let this last wall crumble, not yet. I'm back on the sofa where I "sleep" before I hear his soft footsteps. I hear him yawn as he walks in and I close my eyes to fake being asleep.

"'Kura?" By his voice I know he's standing over me. "Are you asleep?"

I growl and pull the pillow over my head; acting as I he just woke me. "No landlord, I just like lying around with my eyes closed."

Although my face is coved by the pillow I know that Ryou is smiling at me. That soft smile of his that managed to break through walls of solid ice. Soft, that word fits him too well; soft, delicate and so many other words…

He chuckles. "I'll make us some breakfast." I hear him walk away and I pull the pillow back, watching him from the corner of my eye. Before he would never laugh at me or around me. Before he would have whispered a quiet apology for waking me, but not anymore and I like it this way. By no means are we lovers, but for now this is good enough for me; more than good enough.

I'm broken out of my thoughts when he calls out to say that breakfast is done and the morning continues as it always has for these past few months. Ryou talks lightly and playfully scolds me for my messy eating habits and I grumble back at him more out of routine than real annoyance. Like always he made me help with the dishes and I complained the whole time, although I really didn't mind. As I put the last dish away the phone rang and Ryou ran off quickly to answer it, only to return quickly afterwards with a happy smile on his face.

"It was Yugi. He wanted to know if I can hang out with him, can I 'Kura?"

I roll my eyes slightly at his question. "Of course you can. Do I have to make all the decisions for you?"

Ryou blushes softly and shakes his head. "No, I just wanted to ask. If you wanted to, you could come too Bakura."

"I rather nail my hand to drywall first." I reply dully as I slump into the sofa. "Being around the pharaoh and his former container makes me sick."

From the corner of my eye I can see him roll his eyes at my comment and I fight a smile; he's gotten much bolder over time. He replies with a soft "okay" before he leaves me alone once more. I sigh softly to myself as I gaze up at the ceiling, part of me wanting to follow him and ask him to stay with me while the other part wants me to just let him be.

"Bakura?" I hear him call me and I turn my gaze to him, he now has his jacket with him and was watching me with a smile. "Are you sure it's okay I leave? I can stay if you really want me too."

I pushed the want to say yes away. "I don't need you to baby-sit me landlord. Just go have fun; the house will be here when you get back."

He smiles brighter at me and nods. "I'll be back before five o'clock, I promise."

I nod, acting like it's nothing and mumble a good bye to him as he leaves. Silences takes over the house as I lay on the sofa alone. I feel cold now that he's gone, like when I was in the Ring. I groan loudly as I turn on my side as the boredom began to eat at me. As I lay there thinking to myself, sleep found me…

My eyes slide open as that awful ringing noise continued. I swore out loud as I got up and swiftly grabbed the telephone. "What is it!" I yell as I rub the sleep from my eyes.

"Bakura…" A sadden voice answered.

"What Pharaoh!" I growl, not even caring enough to mock his depressed tone. "I have better things to do than…"

"Something happened." He cut me off and I felt my heart drop. Oh gods, Ryou…

"Where is he! What did you do!" I don't care if I am letting my emotions show, all I care about now is Ryou.

"We're at the hospital. The doctors said…" I didn't listen to another word; I dropped the phone and ran to find my shoes.

The way to the hospital was a blur, my mind racing too fast to pay attention. It was like my body went into autopilot and I only reigned control once I went through the hospital's door. Atemu was easy to find, he was in a waiting room, his arm gently around Yugi who was sobbing into his shoulder.

"You!" I yell, causing Yugi to jump slightly. "Where is Ryou! What the fuck happened!" My body shook with rage and fear.

Yugi hid his face in the pharaoh's shoulder and Atemu looked up at me, his eyes dark. "It was a car…it came out of nowhere. I tried to pull him out of the way…"

I could barely breathe; my heart was beating so hard it was hard to hear Atemu's voice. "Where is Ryou?"

Atemu looked away from me and Yugi let out another pitiful sob. "He's dead…"

The glass bit into my skin as the mirror shattered into a thousands bits, the blood dipped onto the floor as I let out another scream. A lamp flew across the living room into a wall as I continued to destroy everything I can get my hands on. I was drowning in my rage and emptiness, lost in the endless madness that overcame me the moment I walked into this house. I can feel him still; he's here in this house, his smile, his laughter, his soft words…

More wordless screams, more items thrown, more glass breaking; but it doesn't help. This feeling, I had felt it once before so long ago…in Kuru Eruna. I let out a one last scream as I fell to my knees, sobbing. I was alone again, just as I had been in the beginning. "Why gods? Why?" I asked as I pulled at my hair, my tears mixing with my blood.

"Oh how the mighty thief king has fallen!" A cruel voice mocked me and I looked up quickly, forcing my tears back. There was nothing, just the dark now destroyed living room, not another soul in sight. I rose to my feet, looking around wanting to let my rage loose on the one who dared to ridicule me.

"Where are you?" I growled, ready to give someone the beating of a lifetime. "Come out here and say that to my face you fucking coward!"

"The mere thief should learn to hold his tongue!" The voice seemed to come everywhere at once, echoing to the point it cause my head to throb. "So the thief wishes to get cocky, does he?" The voice laughed heartlessly and I could hear the sound of foot steps now. "Come out he says…if that is what he wants…"

Every sound went dead; the only sound was of me breathing. Each second took hours before I felt someone's breath against my ear. "It's what he will get!"

I was caught by surprise and I jumped away from the voice, quickly spinning around to find myself faced with…Ryou.

No…not Ryou. It was some kind of sick monster that was trying to look like Ryou, the skin was tight on the skull, the hair dirty and bloody hang limply and it's smile was anything but Ryou's smile; it's teeth looked like rusty nails. It continued to smile sickly and reached out toward me, the nails of it's hands long, jagged and the colour of old blood. "What's wrong 'Kura?" It asked, trying to sound as soft as Ryou had. "Aren't you happy to see me 'Kura?" It began to laugh again and I could feel my shock giving way to rage once again.

"Don't you dare call me that! Only he could call me that, you twisted bastard!" I roared as my whole body shook. "I don't know what you are, but get the hell out of here!"

It pouted at me and shook it's head. "That isn't nice. So, you want to be mean 'Kura? Okay…" It laughed again and I was about to run over and choke the laughter right out of it when I felt my body being thrown up against the wall. I gasped as the wind was knocked out of me and found I was unable to move at all. The thing walked over and smiled, reaching up to pet my face; leaving painful cuts from it's nails. "Silly silly 'Kura, you should know better by now."

I hissed as I felt it's nails cutting in deeper and found myself looking into it's eyes; not the warm brown colour Ryou's eyes were, instead they were lifeless gray. "What the fuck are you?" I snarled, trying not to wince in pain.

"Oh 'Kura, you should know what I am." It answered and made a tsk tsk noise as it shook it's head. "You always forget…so let me refresh your memory…" It said as it reached out and placed one of it's hands on my forehead.

The pain felt as if someone had taken a hot poker and stabbed me through the head. All sane thought left me and I screamed in torment. Images flashed through my mind all at once: my last dark game with the pharaoh, dueling against Yugi, becoming one with Zork and be destroyed with him, my soul being ripped from both Ryou and the Ring, my soul finally facing judgment…and absolute damnation.

"O-oh g-gods…" I feel the tears falling again, now that I know the truth. "T-this…none of this is real…it's hell…"

"A hell you made for yourself 'Kura." It never stopped smiling, taking joy from my suffering. "Your soul has been damned beyond any other. So damned that Ammit would not take it! So it was up to the gods to make a new punishment for you. And can you remember what it was now 'Kura?" It asked, laughing deeply.

I nodded as I cried, my soul and will broken beyond any repair. "T-to make me l-live out my p-perfect day…" I bit down on my lip as I sobbed harder. "only to h-have it t-turn back into t-this hell!"

"Good job 'Kura! Such a good boy, you remember." It tone was scornful as it forced me to look up, it's eyes burning into my own. "He doesn't miss you one bit 'Kura. He'll never miss you! No matter how much you miss him, isn't that sad?"

I wailed at it's cruel comment, knowing it was true. I had done nothing but brought Ryou pain and loneness, now I'm damned to see him smile and laugh only to have him taken away. "P-please gods…t-torture me f-forever…d-do whatever you want t-to me! J-just p-please don't m-make me l-live t-through that d-day again." I sobbed, begging for mercy I knew I would never receive. "D-don't make me l-lose him a-again…"

It shook it's head, that twisted smile never fading. "Sorry 'Kura…" It leaned forward and I tried to fight it off, screaming and begging only for it to push it's horrid lips against mine. The fog filled my head as I felt my memories being ripped from me…

It's strange to think that someone like me would be this blessed. I slowly wake to find Ryou sleeping beside me, looking so beautiful… Its paradise, somehow I ended up in paradise…

Fin