Hi guys, I shouldn't be writing this since I have to finish my other story, but oh well. Hope you like it please R & R. Happy you're fish awaits:

Katnissxo does not own me Natsu Lucy or anyone else from Fairy tail, all she owns is this fanfic and many fish . Hiro Mashima is the true owner!

Thank you Happy here's a fish for you! Katnissxo

RATED M FOR SELF HARM AND EATING DISORDERS

Lucy PoV

103.2 pounds. It was disgusting. I could practically see the fat bunched up around my stomach, my ribs barely showed and my thighs were giant, the voice in my head taunted me.

Lucy, Lucy, you actually thought you could eat something? Go ahead ,don't say I didn't warn you though. You're so fat already , who could ever love you like this? You're worthless, nothing but a burden to the world. So eat all you want you pig, even Natsu says it himself. "God Luce, your such a pig, can't you ever stop eating?"

She was right. No one would ever love me, not like this fat, ugly, pig I was. I had to do something. Quickly I ran towards the toilet and leaned over, with two fingers down my throat I felt the revolting meal I had just eaten spill out my mouth. My fingers burned lightly, but it was painful.

And that was good.

Pain was good.

I deserved as much of it as possible

After rinsing my mouth and washing my hands, I turned back to the mirror. I was truly hideous, with greasy blonde hair and the red streaks across my upper thighs.

It was my secret. No one could ever know.

Normal POV

Lucy made her way to the guild after applying make up to hide the dark circles under her eyes, not that anyone would notice though, they would fall for the fake smile and cheerful personality without hesitation. The face she wore in front of everyone.

Except for one person. Except for him. She could trust him, but he didn't know her any more.

Lucy stride into the guild and was ambushed by Natsu.

"LUCE!WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? NEVERMIND, I WANT TO INTRODUCE YOU TO SOMEONE!" Seeing her visibly flinch at the shouting he said,"sorry, but you have to meet her! Luce, this is Lisanna Strauss, Lisanna this is Lucy Heartfilia. The girl I told you about."

Something hit Natsu and he turned around finding the culprit to be his best frenemy Gray Fullbuster.

"You wanna fight ice princess?" He smirked and hurled a stream of fire at Gray. Thus began their daily fight.

Lucy ignored them and took in the image in front of her, a white haired girl, wearing a sky blue dress and white stilletos. She glared at Lucy and sneered, "so, you're Natsu's new "best friend"? I wouldn't get too used to it, after all you were only a distraction for him, whilst he waited for me to get here." The celestial mage looked shocked and was on the verge of tears, how dare this girl just waltz in and act as if she owned her best friend?

Well, have you seen how skinny she is? Of course Natsu would choose her over you, besides her hair doesn't look like a bird's nest.

Luce had an internal struggle, whether or not she should fight back to Lisanna. But she couldn't think of anything to say, so she just dumbly nodded her head and walked off, to talk to Mira.

Lucy Pov

"Hey Lucy, your usual?" She questioned. Why couldn't I be more like Mira she had the perfect body and it doesn't change no matter how much she eats.

Maybe I could eat something and work off all the-

DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT. SAY NO TO HER RIGHT NOW YOU FAT, SORRY, EXCUSE OF A GIRL.

"No thanks Mira I had a large breakfast." I saw her give me a strange look. I remember telling her one day "no matter how much I eat I will always had space for a milkshake." Oh Mira, how the tables have turned. Feeling a growl in my stomach I decided that water would be okay. Well it would be great because it is healthy.

You may drink as much water as you want. Eat nothing else, pig. Don't you dare eat anything...

There went the thought of dinner.

I love water, it has a comforting feel to it. Which is ironic, because Aquarius is the opposite of comforting. After ordering a water and downing it in two gulps, I decided to go find Natsu to see if he wanted to go on a mission.

"LUCHEEEEEE! You have to help! It's Natsu h-he kissed Lisanna's cheek!" I tried to keep a straight face, but after seeing how serious Happy was I burst into a fit of giggles. Deep down it hurt, to know that Natsu has replaced me;had found someone else. He wasn't mine to start with, but now my heart ached for someone different. I wished that I could see him, he'd know what to do.

"Happy,it's okay that's what couples do." But by now Happy had angrily flown off after muttering "Stupid, fat Luce."

Even a flying cat thinks you're fat, great going. You know what you're going to do? You're gonna go to the gym and excersize.

But Natsu-

God how dumb can a blonde get, he replaced you, HE IS NOW GONG OUT WITH LISANNA! GET THE HELL OVER IT.

I blinked trying to clear the tears blocking my vision. And headed home. At home I forced myself to do a quick calorie burn workout and dunk 5 cups of water.

I waited for Natsu to crash in with Happy but they never turned up. Only then did it hit me. Natsu has replaced me.

It was true, and the truth hurt. Grabbing the blade from its secret hiding spot, I placed it to my oversized thighs and cut.

One for everything that was wrong.

He replaced me.

He doesn't love me.

I'm a fat pig.

I'm not pretty.

I'm weak.

I'm burden to everyone.

I still wanted him back.

Scars old and new marred my thighs. None of my spirits new. If they did would they care, I wonder?

Of course not you're just a fat,burden they have to deal with. You control them.

Sobbing, I went to bed and fell asleep, whilst letting the pain subside.

The next morning I woke and weighed my self. 101.6 pounds. This became my routine for the next few weeks. I rarely went to the guild and instead worked on my novel. It would be another week until Levy and the others would get back. I took. Solo mission every 4 days and payed my rent, often ending up with extra. After 2 weeks and a day I was finally 90 pounds.

Don't you dare think you can relax or eat you're still really fat, you will be beautiful one day. Unfortunately fat pig no one cares, just go kill yourself...

Hmmm not a bad idea. But how to do it. I decided to go and visit mama's grave before... Dying.

On the way leaving the flower shop I saw Lisanna and Natsu talking. Just talking. Had I rushed and assumed Natsu was going out with lisanna?! After all Lisanna had only gloated about being best friends.

He'll never want you, pig.

But I've changed- I'm skinny.

Whoever told you that ,because they were lying?

I was so torn that I didn't see the car the swerved around the curb. I suddenly slipped and felt a pair of strong hands pull me out the way.

I opened my eyes and found deep blue ones staring back. I recognised my saviour immediately.

It was him.

—-

Who is him? And how does Lucy know him? Please review and sorry for any bad grammar or spelling mistakes. Any criticism is welcome too.