Set fire to the rain
Set fire to the rain
I noticed this song in the background of impossible astronaut and thought it perfectly suited their relationship. Set fire to the rain – Adele.
'I let it fall, my heart
And as it fell, you rose to claim it
It was dark and I was over
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me'
River was young and happy enough with focusing on career she had just graduated University with honours highest in her class and was ready to travel the world doing what she loved. Though one thing had always been missing from her life she had never truly been in love there had been plenty of men, but none of them could ever compare to that mad man. She would never admit this even to herself that she longed to see him again. She had instead chosen to avoid this by distracting herself with work and adventures. But little did she know the greatest adventure of all was just around the corner waiting to sweep her off her feet.
They were excavating a lost tomb in Egypt they were deep underground in aceint catacomb when suddenly the roof began to collapse dirt and bricks cascaded around her. She desperately scrambled at the falling earth trying to get a grip on something even though she knew it was impossible to escape the impending doom, she was not about to give up 'doctor!' she cried out in final desperation. It was terrifyingly dark when cool hands grabbed her and pulled her into blinding light.
It was the doctor, she hadn't seen him in a long time, she was so revealed, so happy to be alive she flung her arms around his neck smiling like a madman. Then she collected herself 'You took your time!' she lightly slapped him on the shoulder partly out of annoyance but mostly out of relief that he had. He grinned moving closer to her 'how could I resist' he often teased her like this but she knew he was only winding her up. It annoyed her how he thought he knew her so well so decided to tease him back out of frustration. Today he was different. He looked at her almost as if he could see through her and bend down till their faces were only inches apart he gently kissed her lips. It took her off guard at first, she had always imagined what kissing the doctor would be like but never thought it could be so perfect, it sweet and filled with a thousand unsaid things 'wow' river jumped back in surprise. 'why, what's wrong?' he looked suddenly worried. 'nothing, it was amazing, just where did it come from?' Sudden realisation dawned on his face, he was sheepish now 'we've never done that before have we?' River beamed and shook her head.
'My hands, they were strong, but my knees were far too weak
To stand in your arms without falling to your feet'
They were too late there was nothing they could do thousands of people had died. River shook with grief it was all her all those lives that would never be lived, families, friends and children all dead their bodies washed away. Yes many people had died before in their adventures but there had always been people who survived and the doctor had taught her to focus on that. Today there was no one to focus on, no one had been saved and it was all her fault. Until now she had been so strong so brave even when she was braking down inside. How could the doctor do this? His crazy life it was becoming just too much for her. How could he just fly away and forget. This was grief beyond anything she had felt before. What was the point any more of this false bravado pretending to be alright what was the point in anything any more. How could she live with herself? Silent tears streamed down her face. The Doctor looked at River with such sorrow and understanding in his eyes. He held her in his arms tightly. She crumpled into him losing all feeling becoming cold inside. He supported her weight gently moving them on the seat in the control room she slumped against him and his grip tightened. 'River?' he asked cautiously. 'I know it's hard right now, believe me I know but I promise things will be better in time and I will always be here' She couldn't bring herself to respond so simply laid against him numbly listening to his beautiful voice washing over her like water slowly healing her and softening the memories of the day.
'But there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true
And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win'
It was the first time he had ever raised his voice to her, he was being pushed to his limits faced with an impossible choice. It was a frightening thing to see the usually ever so calm and collected man completely lose it, scared as she was she held her ground. 'It's impossible River!' she hated the way he shouted the words, they sounded wrong alien 'there's nothing I can do'. As hope began to drain away, River suddenly became determined she was not about to die here. The Doctor had said it was impossible well she was going to prove him wrong then.
He smiled and said ' I knew you would do it, I'm sorry I couldn't tell you' Oh how she wanted to slap him right now thinking he was so clever knowing exactly that she would do what he wanted all along. This was when River first discovered the doctor lied and she would never forget it. 'I hate you' she scowled, knowing she didn't really mean it , but saying it made her feel better. The doctor however wasn't fooled, he called her bluff with a slight smile as he replied 'No you don't'.
'But I set fire to the rain
Watched it pour as I touched your face
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name'
She stood and watched the doctor stumble backwards as the gun shot hit him. 'Doctor!' Amy cried out River grabbed her as she attempted to run to him. She knows that there must be a reason he told them to stay and tries desperately to convey this to her mother 'Amy! Stay back! The Doctor said stay back!'. The gun fired again and he fell to his knees and began to regenerate, her heart was pounding fast, she knew he was about to change. 'I'm sorry' he said. River began to panic now, knowing that something is wrong and something terrible is about to happen. In the seconds it took her brain to process this, the astronaut fired one last deadly shot. Time seemed to freeze as the doctors lifeless body hit the sand, River lost all her composer, she was sprinting towards him as if her life depended on it her heart in her throat. Her brain aromatically kicking into logical mode as she dropped down next to him at the same moment as pulling out her scanner, barely aware of her surroundings. 'River.. River!..' Amy asked desperately. The machine gave her nothing, but a pathetic beep, the last of her hope died. She looked at her mother wishing she could bring her comfort and hated knowing that she couldn't. As anger boiled up inside her she stood quickly pulling out her gun shooting at the astronaut with everything she had biting back the tears, until she ran out of ammunition. 'Of course not' she said almost to herself, the doctor knew this was going to happen, if he had wanted help he would have asked. That dam man. Amy's voice drew her back to reality 'River, he can't be dead. This is impossible.' She hated seeing her like this Amy was suppose to be strong and comfort her but she knew it was too early on. She must be the strong one 'Whatever that was, it killed him in the middle of his regeneration cycle. His body was already dead. He didn't make it to the next one.' Her voice shook a little as she tryed to make Amy understand but she managed to keep control. She notice movement behind her and turned to see an elderly man stood next to her. 'I believe I can save you some time. That most certainly is the Doctor, and he is most certainly dead. He said you'd need this.' He placed a tank at the doctors feet, She understood and braced herself for what had to be done. Gasoline? Rory asked confused. River explained quickly 'A Time Lord's body is a miracle. Even a dead one. There are whole empires out there who'd rip this world apart for just one cell. We can't leave him here. Or anywhere' Tears were cascading down Amy's cheeks it cut River deep to see her mother so beside herself with grief, as she stroked the doctors face begging him 'Wake up! Go on, wake up, you stupid bloody idiot! What do we do, Rory?' River replied steeling her expression hiding all the traces of her pain 'We're his friends. We do what the Doctor's friends always do'. She leant down and picked up the can 'As we're told.' Rory looked around 'There's a boat. If we're going to do this...let's do it properly.' So Roman she thought. The doctors body burning in the centre of the lake was a terribly moving site. Watching the man she loved floating away so elegantly as the flames hungrily consumed his body. She finally gave in and let the tears begin to fall gently down her cheeks. She knew this was far from over.
'When laying with you I could stay there
Close my eyes, feel you here forever
You and me together, nothing is better'
They laid in the meadow their bodies pressed against each other perfectly moulded together. It was a rare moment they could share simply laid together in the gleaming sun, detached from the rest of the world completely content with just being together. He turned to look at her and she gave him one of her most irresistible smiles 'yes sweetie?' He leaned closer to her and gently kissed her lips. Then moved up her neck kissing each inch of shimmering skin until he reached her ear, where he moved closer and whispered 'I love you'. She had never been happier she closed her eyes wishing the moment would never end.
'But I set fire to the rain
Watched it pour as I touched your face
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
When we fell, something died
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time'
She touched his cheek longing him to remember, to know who she was, she tried to breath but suddenly the room seemed to empty of oxygen as panic rose in her chest she realised his piercing eyes stared back at her empty. 'Doctor...please tell me you know who i am?' she begged him, though terrified of the answer. 'Who are you?' he asked politely. She felt something snap inside her, she had been through so much with this man but nothing had ever her caused her pain like this. She knew this day had been coming and knew it would break her heart but never expected it to be so sudden. She was glad to be distracted from this hollowing emptiness, by the suddenly flashing monitor.