Disclaimer: These characters aren't mine. But you already knew that.
Summary: Blair Waldorf is more than a tiara and an expensive ring, and she's more than Clair Carlyle, and she's more than a stolen moment. — D/B. Pre-5x13.
Notes: I was bored, inspired and I saw a post on tumblr saying that Dan loved Clair and not Blair... I got mad, and this is the result.
They don't love you like I love you.
They say that he's in love with Clair Carlyle, the beautiful broken girl from his book. He doesn't know what to say. It's true, but it's a lie. It's a lie because they say it like he doesn't love Blair, like is Clair the one he wants.
But they don't know that Clair is Blair in more ways than they could imagine. Dan wonders if they actually know who Blair really is. She's not a saint, and he doesn't thinks she's an angel, but she's not the devil either. They can't see the rest, only the darkness, and it makes Dan sick. They don't love her like he loves her, because they don't really see her.
Clair Carlyle is Blair in so many ways. Like the way she likes her coffee, her smell and her favorite movie, or just the way she laughs at Dylan (shaking her head, because really, Hunter?).
She's Blair because she bites her bottom lip when she meets Dylan, because her eyes are sad and her dress is green and she looks genuine and unique, because sometimes she's afraid of the future and because she dreams about being a powerful woman.
She is Blair because she cries without tears, in the darkness, and she doesn't let Dylan hold her hand, because the shape of her lips drives Dylan insane, because he feels her soft fingers in his neck the first time they kiss, because her head rests in Dylan's shoulder when she falls sleep while watching The Philadelphia Story and because she sobs a little when they watch Nights of Cabiria, and she says Don't look at me, Hunter, it's freaking me out and then she tries to dry her tears but she can't and he does it for her.
But they weren't there, they wouldn't know. They couldn't know, because they didn't see her bright smile when she was eating pizza in the loft, even with her sad eyes, and they didn't see her barefoot sitting in his couch, telling him Don't talk, Humphrey, I want to see the movie and then smacking his arm just because she could.
Of course he loves Clair Carlyle, in a way. How could he not love her when he's Dylan Hunter? How could he not love her when she's Blair Waldorf? How could they fail to notice that Blair is not only darkness and deceit, that she's spark and laughter too?
He remembers Blair in her wedding dress, heartbroken, with all her darkness and full of sadness, and he recalls that all he wanted to do was make her happy. (She's getting married in two days and he's going to be there, watching her smile but noticing her empty eyes, so sad and so weak, and so far away from the Blair he fell for, but beautiful all the same. She's Blair and he loves her and he doesn't want to see her making this horrible mistake, but he can't stop her).
Clair Carlyle is Blair Waldorf, she wants to be happy but she can't, she's afraid of freedom because she doesn't want to be alone. But Blair Waldorf is so much more than simple literature, she's more than a beautiful broken girl, more than an expensive ring and an empty smile, she's more than that wedding dress and tears when no one can see, she's more than holding hands and she's more than Chanel, she's more than a tiara and champagne. She's more than a kiss (or three), more than a thousand movies or a character in a book.
She's real. She's a reason to live, a reason to smile and reason to try. She changes lives and holds hearts without even knowing. There aren't enough words to describe her eyes before a kiss or the way she speaks, even less words to describe her.
She's more than a stolen moment.
(In the hallway was Clair Carlyle, sitting on the floor in her green dress, her hair is brown and in curls, her eyes dead without dreams, her lips trembling and her hands shaking, with her broken voice and all the weakness, trying to be strong, with all those tears she was crying inside. She was broken girl with a broken heart, shattered hopes and without a smile gracing her pretty face.
.
And then he saw Clair's eyes and he knew she was scared of love, but she was already feeling it running beneath her skin. And all that pain just for Charlie Trout. Oh, such a shame.
She was a scared little girl, loving recklessly, wanting a happy ending and being consumed in all that darkness.
.
She was all sparks and light, and he wanted to kiss her. She was in front of him with her bright eyes, her pink lips and her soft skin, and he really wanted to kiss her and take all her pain away. He only needed one kiss. But he couldn't figure out how to kiss Clair Carlyle.
"Oh! For crying out loud, Hunter!"
His mind went blank).
She's more than a stolen moment. She's the love of his life.
Dan doesn't really love Clair. Dylan loves Clair because Dan is stupidly in love with Blair Waldorf.