SM owns everything Twilight. I don't own the image either.
BPOV
My chest expands with the deep and delicious breath I take as I lay down on my couch. I can feel the wood of the cushion divider on my lower back, reminding me of how old said couch is. Yet, I can't help but love the feel of something supporting my weight instead of my tired and swollen feet.
I close my eyes and I know that if I keep them closed I will fall asleep. My exhaustion makes my body ache all over and I have to stretch like a cat, for I can feel my legs cramping. I open my eyes and stare at the ceiling. Some of it is peeling off and I keep imagine the roof falling on top of me. I probably won't move if it does. I'll either be too tired or simply wouldn't care.
Thoughts like those make me halt and question my sanity. How exactly did I get here? I remember being a child full of dreams. Successful dreams. Dreams of owning a beautiful home, and living a comfortable life. Not rich by any means, but enough to have a couch that doesn't make your body ache even more the next day, after offering the previous night a little bit of comfort after working all day.
"Long day, huh?" asks Emily, taking a seat on one of the plastic chairs across from its plastic table.
"Aren't they all." I respond with a sigh, her face shows some pity, but I don't want that. I think part of her knows that, making her not respond to my comment. "How was Ellie?" I ask as I sit up and stretch some more. I can't afford to fall asleep just yet. I have some chores before that happens.
"An angel like always. You know it's almost an insult to ask that," she says smiling and showing affection for my reason of living. "I wish every kid I took care of, was as behaved as she is. She is such a caring little girl. You've done a wonderful job with her."
And with that, my exhaustion takes a backseat. Every ache, every sacrifice, and every tear are worth it because of her. After all of this time, I never knew I could be this strong, yet I know that all of this strength is because of her.
I try my best to smile at my friend Emily. The lump forming in my throat, keeps me from responding but I know that she can see, how much those words mean to me. I've been so lucky to have found Emily. She's wonderful for Ellie, after having gone through so many babysitters none of them stock around long enough for us to become friends. They find my working schedule hard to keep up with so I couldn't blame them, but I can't say I am not grateful to finally find someone that works for everyone.
"Bella, I want to talk to you about something." says Emily in a hesitant voice. And just like that, I fear she's going to leave. What am I going to do? Where am I supposed to find someone I can trust? How much money will I be charged? Will I be able to afford it?
"Everything with Ellie is fine I assure you. You know how much I have learned to love her. I don't have children of my own just yet, but to me she's become quite the important person in my heart. Sam is getting transferred to another city and I've talked to him about it. We were hoping we could find a way so that I can keep living here or a way for me to still take care of Ellie, but it doesn't add up. We can't afford it, and I know that it will probably be way more expansive for you to take her to Port Angeles every day. I'm so sorry Bella, I know that you have put a lot of faith in me in regards with Ellie." I can see that she's affected by this, and as much as I know this will be stressful for me, all I can feel is sadness for I will be losing a good friend and Ellie will lose someone else. Again.
"You know that I will always be in debt to you. You have done so much for both of us. You have sacrificed your free time and have even included Ellie in your life in order to take care of her while I work. We both will miss you, and you know that, but I understand. I appreciate you telling me. How long?" I ask dreading the answer. Everyone else have giving me less than a week in advance. I really am praying that isn't the case with her.
"A month. I will help you look for someone. Again, I'm sorry. I know that this isn't what you need to hear after a long day." I can tell she feels guilty, but she shouldn't. I couldn't ask for someone better than Emily. I'm really going to miss her.
"Don't feel guilty Emily. You don't know how much I thank you, for letting me know in advance, and for everything that you've done for both Ellie and I." I say as I stand up as I see her gathering her things. It's late and she'll be leaving soon.
"No, thank you Bella. I appreciate how much trust you have put in me. And you know that I'm always here for you. Though I'll be living a little too far to take care of Ellie every day. Don't hesitate to call me if you need something."
After wishing one another a goodnight. Emily leaves for the night, leaving me with a lot to think about. I can feel my head starting to hurt so I decide a Tylenol is in order if I want to be in less pain. As I fill a glass with water, my mind starts racing. After two years with Emily, it's going to be hard to start from the beginning. I take a deep breath as I close the tap. I exhale slowly and pop the pill in my mouth. I drink the water and finish the glass, filling a bit better after the relieve that provides the lump in my throat. I close my eyes and take another deep breath. No, crying won't help. I need to be strong for Ellie. We've made it this far. We will be okay.
I rinse the glass quickly and place it next to the other clean dishes that from the looks weren't done too long from now. I shake my head, as I make a mental note to yell at Emily again for doing it, yet I'm a little relieved one of the chores is out of the list of tonight. I make my way across the little one bedroom apartment to check on my princess. I carefully grab the handle and try to lift the door so it lessens the crack it makes when it opens. The little lamp next to her bed is on and it makes it easier to see her angelic and peaceful face. I take a deep breath as I make my way towards her bed and sit next to her. I bring the cover a little higher on her, making sure to cover Charlie too. She loves that bear more than I ever did. I carefully take her chocolate curl from her face, admiring her beautiful face. Tears gather in my eyes as I take her in. She has been through so much, and she has been such a strong and brave little girl. I wipe the tears off my cheeks as I lean over and place a kiss on her soft forehead. I stand up carefully not to disturb her and make my way out the bedroom.
I make my way towards the bathroom and gather all of the dirty laundry from the basket so I can separate it and take it to the apartment's washers first thing in the morning. After putting them in different black bags, I leave them next to the door and head to kitchen again to prepare tomorrow's meal.
After making some pasta and sauce, I cover them; placing them in the fridge ready for Emily to reheat it for Ellie. Opening the fridge reminds me that a shopping trip is very necessary, and Friday's check is very much needed. I check the cabinets and decide that indeed a visit to the grocery store is due. I grab a notebook from one of the drawers and start off writing down the necessities. I make sure I add lucky charms to the list. I wish I could give Ellie everything that she could ever want, but all I can do at this point is get her, her favorite cereal. Her smile is so big when she sees the box in our shopping cart, the extra dollars paid versus the economic brand is worth it.
I finish the list, feeling my eyes dropping more often as my yawning increases in numbers. I turn all of the light off, and check the lock before heading to the bathroom and grabbing a quick shower.
Five minutes later, I am laying down in my twin bed next to Ellie's and lay on my back as I stare up at the ceiling. I see the same damage on it as in the living room, but the little florescent stars glued to it, reminds me that I have to be strong. My roof might be crumbling, but my precious little thing sleeping next to my bed, reminds me that the stars will always be up there for me to look at. Just like the hope and strength that I have. All for her. And with that I close my eyes and let sleep take me.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
I manage to reach my cellphone after the third ring. I cast a look over to Ellie, and find her on her side holding on to Charlie, and thankfully asleep. It feels as if I had just closed my eyes only to open them again, for a new day to start. It's six and I have many things to get done before my shift starts at eleven. Working at a hotel as a housekeeper gives me the chance to get some things done during the early morning. And although I only work there for about four hours a day during the week and eight during the weekends it seems that I'm always there. It also gives me a few hours with Ellie. When I come home from my second job, midnight tends to be quite late for her to be up.
I get up and make my bed. Funny how before I wouldn't even care what my bed looked like. Now, I have to make up the beds before I can go on with my day.
At least I've learned a good habit from housekeeping.
I make my way towards the closet, picking clothes for Ellie and placing them on my bed. Then I reach for one of my uniforms and make my way to the living room to set up the iron and table with a towel so I can iron my uniform. I make my way towards the tiny kitchen which really consists of a very old stove, a sink and the fridge with a cabinet with a few dividers. I set up the coffee maker and make my way towards the table again so I can do the ironing. Bringing a finger to my mouth, I wet the tip of my pointer and bringing it to the hot metal making sure it's hot enough. After hearing the little hiss from the evaporating saliva, I start to iron the dreaded thing. I've never liked skirts or dresses before but now that's all it seems I wear. Both jobs require me to wear either one, so I've had time to get used to them. I don't mind them as much now, but I do feel happier wearing my favorite old jeans.
Feeling satisfied with the wrinkle-free fabric. I unplug the iron and bring it to the sink where I splash some cold water on it. The last thing I need is for my forgetful self to leave it somewhere I burn something or more important Ellie reaching for it. After checking the iron is cold, I wrap the cord around it and make my way to the bedroom. I take the iron to the closet and place it all the way on top. Then make my way towards Ellie's bed and sit on the edge.
"Ellie, wake up honey." I say softly not to startle her, as I softly reach for her curly hair and scratch her scalp. I caress her cheek as I see her starting to move. Beautiful hazel eyes blink up at me. A little disoriented but as soon as she recognizes what's going on, I am rewarded with one of her sweet smiles. Those dimples make her look like an angel.
"Hello." she greets. She's of few words when it's early. Actually we both are. Both of us, not morning people.
"Hi, there." I smile at her, and lower myself to kiss her forehead. As I sit up, she moves to get up and moves towards the bathroom to wash her teeth. I stand up and make up her bed, making sure to leave Charlie on top of her pillow in case she wants to take him with her. I hear the door of the bathroom open, followed by tiny footsteps towards the bedroom. I make my way towards my bed, taking a seat on the edge so I can help her get dress and reach for her clothes with easiness. After dressing her up in a cute shirt and some jeans, she walks to her closet and gets her shoes. She takes a seat on her bed and I kneel down in order to tie her shoes. I smile up at her, as she hops and makes her way towards the bathroom to get a hairbrush. I reach for my clothes and change from my baggy and old t-shirt to a more fitted shirt and my favorite old jeans. I'm bottoming my pants as Ellie comes in the room, turning around holding out the hairbrush for me to reach.
"Thank you, Ellie." I respond taking a seat on her bed. Our routine hasn't changed much after she learned how to brush her own teeth. I carefully try not to pull on any tangles, making her beautiful hair wave behind her to the middle of her little back. She hands me a ribbon which I place on the end of the french braid I managed to put her precious hair in.
"There. Let's eat some breakfast before we do some laundry, okay?" I say as I reach for Charlie, passing it to her. Which she hugs and replies a sweet thank you to.
We make our way towards the table, she take a seat on one of the chairs as I make my way to the kitchen. I reach for the nearly empty box of lucky charms and fill her favorite cookie monster bowl. I serve myself a cup of coffee and make my way towards the table. She has Charlie in front of her. She's talking to him and fixing his overalls.
"Well, he looks rather handsome." I say with a smile as I place the bowl in front of her.
"Yes, he does. He's happy to clean some clothes." she says in her pretty voice.
I reach for one of the apples in front on me and proceed to finish my coffee and apple. We don't really speak much during our breakfast. I think we're both too tired yet to say much. After we both finish our food, I gather the stuff and bring them to the sink and make haste on cleaning them. I wouldn't want Emily to beat me again. Which reminds me again that we'll have to look for someone for Ellie.
I go back to the join Ellie and take a seat next to her. I reach for one of her small hands and bring it to my cheek and giving it a small kiss on her palm as I turn her tiny hand.
"I need to talk to you about something important." I know that she will be sad with Emily leaving but I have to tell her, and prepare her until that happens.
"I promise, I didn't call Mrs. Stanley mean." She says in a panic voice.
I give her an amused look, as I arc my eyebrow.
"Well, I sure do hope that's the case, but no, I wasn't talking about meany Stanley." I say in a teasing voice, causing her to giggle.
"Emily and I had a talk, and she told me, somethings are going to change." I can see the little confused look on her pretty face, so I just finish, "She's moving to another town."
"So I'm never going to see her again?" says in a very sad voice. I can see her eyes a getting a little red and I know she might cry.
"Not everyday, but we will visit her and I'm sure she'll come visit you too, sweetie." I say trying to reassure her, but I can see how much this hurts her, so I bring her to me and she places her little head on my shoulder. "I know that we're going to miss her, because she's going to miss you too very much Ellie. But, Sam's job needs them there. You understand, right?"
Her nodding response, followed by little sniffles break my heart, so I embrace her even tighter, hoping she calms down.
"We're going to be alone again." She says after a few minutes. Ellie is a very smart little girl, and she understands that it's just her and I, but although she understands this, I can still feel how much this hurts her. It hurts me too.
"Well, I didn't know you were so sick of me?" I say trying to lighten the mood. She giggles a little as I rock her back and forth. "We'll be okay baby girl. You and I are the best team. Or what do you think?" I look down at her with a smile.
She reaches my face with her tiny hand and wipes some tears that I didn't know I had. Her lovely eyes, show nothing but love, and that's all I need. I know that we're going to make it no matter what.
"Yes, we are the bestest" says my princess, showing her lovely dimples.
AN: Thanks for reading this. Leave me your thoughts :)
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