AN - so this is an idea I've been thinking about for a while now and I've finally decided to follow its lead. I really hope you guys love it and that you'll give it a review. Enjoy!
The whole thing with Johnny had crushed the life out of him. His lungs gave up that day. That god-awful day in the cold-hearted hospital. They must've known. Must've realized that the only person he had ever cared about - like, really cared about - was dead. So he didn't need to breathe anymore.
He lost it in front of Pony. That was his first mistake. He should've stayed cool... You just couldn't fall apart like that when somebody was watching, else they would try to help. And he really didn't want help - or even need it. He was fine. He was a little emptier, a little less...stable. But he was alright. So what if his body was shutting down? Lungs didn't need to pump in air. Hearts didn't need to beat.
Well, if he was being honest, he would admit that his mind probably wasn't doing so great either. But he knew he was just fine. Hell, he was pretty happy, too. He had every right to be cause he knew he was gonna see Johnny real soon. He just had to think of something good. If he was gonna die, it had to be dramatic enough. It had to be remembered.
Couldn't stand the thought of being forgotten. It was all so unfair. Not that he'd expected any different. But he'd hoped that maybe... Well, he'd hoped that maybe he could be a hero. Like Johnny. He knew it was stupid, that he would die without redemption. But it really wasn't fair. He'd helped those kids, too...
The world thought he was a dirty hood. If he couldn't change their minds, he might as well prove them right. He had lived with a gun in his hand and a curse on his lips. And that was how he meant to die.
His second mistake was calling Darry before he had carried out the first stage of his plan.
"Meet me in the lot. Ten minutes, okay?"
"Dally?" Darry's voice was heavy with concern. "What's goin' on? Is this about Johnny?"
"No, course not," he replied, glancing around hurriedly as if he expected Darry to show up out of nowhere and physically restrain him. He really wanted to be on his way already. He could be dead before dawn if he stopped wasting time on the phone. "Just go to the lot."
But Darry was persistant. "Listen, I know you ain't comfortable talkin' 'bout your feelings and all... But we're real worried for ya. We just lost Johnny. We won't lose you, too."
Dally swallowed hard before answering. How did Darry know? "What're ya goin' on about? I'm fine," he said, laughing strangely. It was hollow rather than bitter. And he knew that had been a mistake as well.
"You don't sound fine," Darry said. There was some background noise. Must've been the others wanting to know what the whole conversation was about. But Darry ignored them and kept talking. "Dally, we want ya to come home. Please? Besides, I really need to tell ya somethin'. And it has to be in person, ya know?"
Reluctantly, Dally agreed. He hung up the payphone and started walking down to the Curtis' place. Maybe he should've gone on with his plan anyway. But he was curious, barely able to keep his mind from wondering what Darry wanted to tell him. Sure, the gun still weighed heavily in his mind as well as in his pocket. It seemed to call less urgently, though. Kinda like it was telling him that it could wait. And the heater was right - guns were always right... Tomorrow would be a new day, a new opportunity to kill himself. His suicide didn't have to be tonight. He just didn't want to keep Johnny waiting.
But he had this weird feeling as he arrived at the Curtis house. For some reason - a real stupid reason - he felt like Darry had just saved his life...
AN - I'm not sure if I want this to be only a one shot... I'll leave that up to you guys, I guess. Just tell me in your reviews if you want another chapter or if it's good how it is. Thank you!