Once Upon A Something
Summary: I don't know it's a fairy tale about a princess in a tower and a prince that comes to her rescue. Does he save her? Most likely, I mean it is a fairy tale. Do they get married? Isn't that usually what happens? Is there a purpose to this story? Probably not. Enjoy!
Disclaimer- I do not own Inuyasha.
(A/N: Please understand that this story was made to be stupid. Like the dumbest fairy tale in the history of fairy tales.)
Once upon a time...
In a land called something...
Lived a princess named Kagome...
Yeah we're starting this story with the ever so classic 'once upon a time' because duh, it's a fairy tale. And as for the 'lived in a land called something' part I'm not sure what you call this place so 'something' is gonna have to be good enough for now. Let's talk about Kagome now since I know all about her. Well not everything I just know the basic shit like her name, age, residence, hobbies, blah blah. Yeah I said blaaaah. Don't like it? Fight me.
So anyway her name is Kagome and if you don't know that by now I'm worried cause I said it about a trillion times already. She was eighteen the last time I check and she was still living in that tower in the middle of nowhere. Look I know that you guys are thinking, "Why don't you know anything?" "Who are you?" And the answers to those questions are it's not my job to fill in the plot holes, and none of your damn business. Where was I? Oh yeah, Kagome, so like I was saying she lives in this tower right, and it's pretty lame. It's in the middle of nowhere and I to think of it as the Donald Trump starter pack for bad ideas.
Although the bathroom in that place was sick! Dude I'm telling you, for a stone-made bore it had a pretty nice bathroom. Marble floors, cream colored walls, Jacuzzi tub, a shower with a shower head that had light settings. Hold on I'm not even finished. There were full length mirrors across the walls, built in speakers for music of course and a lifetime supply of Bath & Body Works items! Oh man I could go on and on about that wonderland other people call a bathroom... I won't though! I'll continue the story.
Let's see what else am I forgetting? I guess I should go over the minor details like how long she's lived there, what she looks like, what she eats, and stuff like that right? So she's been in the tower since she was six, and she was put there because her parents are assholes that thought it'd be a good idea to keep their only daughter locked away in a miserable tower for year and years until a fucking prince somehow finds his way there to get her out! … Sorry I lost it for a second this just gets me so worked up. What? Am I Kagome? No and I told you that it was none of your business who I am! Correction: I actually said that it was none of your damn business. Continuing on, Kagome is a pretty hot chick. She's got long black hair, a pretty nice ass figure and pale skin which should be expected considering how long she'd been in the tower (-cough- twelve years -cough-). If a prince did ever manage to find her he'd be considered the luckiest man alive, or at least he would be in my books and since those are the only books that matter and the only ones we've got it's true. Moooving on, what does Kagome eat? She eats like fruits and vegetables and crap like that. I don't know from where, the plot holes aren't my J-O-B remember? That should be all for now, if I need to explain something else I'll just do it later. For now I'll tell you all the story of Princess Kagome...
..x..
"What should I do today?" Kagome stood up from her bed and went over to the window like she did everyday. With a sigh she sat on the ledge and looked out at the never changing view of tree after tree and cloud after cloud and grass... so much grass. There wasn't too much to do in the tower except sleep, look outside, daydream, bathe, listen to music, read, draw, sing, dance, sleep, listen to music, read, sleep and whatever else Kagome could think of. She decided to go and take a shower in her– amazing ass–bathroom instead of looking out at the world that was definitely having a better time than she was at the moment. And don't get her wrong, some days could be fun, she just wished that they could be better.
After her bath she walked out of the bathroom smelling like Amber Blush, her preferred body wash set and in a black spaghetti strap dress with no shoes since it wasn't like she was going anywhere. (You want to know where she gets her clothes from since she's been in a tower for twelve years? Well I don't know the answer to that either. Oh wait yes I do, she's got a closet full of dresses and whatnot for her fashion pleasures. I mean just because her (-cough- asshole -cough-) parents put her in a tower doesn't mean that they didn't care and wanted her to be uncomfortable).
"I think that I'll draw a little today." And just as Kagome started pulling out her supplies to draw she heard what sounded like someone yelling.
"Oh princess, oh princess, let down your hair!"
Was Kagome imagining it or was someone actually calling to her from outside? It wasn't the first time she thought she heard something other than the the wind... or her imagination. She decided to just ignore it and continue on with her plans to draw.
"Didn't you hear me? I said to give me your freaking hair!"
Okay that time it couldn't have been her imagination. Kagome moved over to the window slowly and sure enough someone was down there. It was a guy with what looked like white or silver hair and... he had nothing else with him. What kind of prince didn't bring anything other than himself on a mission to rescue a princess from a tower? Kagome was honestly expecting a horse or something. Wait... was he even a prince?
"Come on lady I don't have all day. Let your hair down so that we can get a move on already." He said.
What the hell did he just ask her to do? "Sure thing, let me just magically make my hair grow a few thousand inches for you." Kagome called back. Who was this guy?
"Well how else am I going to get you down?"
"I don't know? Try the stairs maybe?"
"What stairs?"
"The one's that lead up to this room." She said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"What the hell? Come down here then."
"No way, do you know how many stairs there are? Not to mention how unsafe they are. "
The "prince" walked away from the front of her tower and around to the back. He found the door that she was talking about and groaned. There really were a shit ton of stairs and not only that, they looked about as safe as using a plastic bag for a parachute. Going back to the window, he thought of other ways to get her down.
"Hey," He called. "Jump down here."
"Excuse me, do what?" Kagome laughed. This guy was a riot! First the hair and now he wanted her to jump out of a freaking window.
"Come on it isn't that far of a jump, I'll catch you."
"If I'm not crazy enough to walk down the unsafest stairs in history, then what makes you think I'll jump out of a damn window?"
"Do you want to get out of there or not?"
"If my only options to get out are jumping out of this window and walking down those stairs, I think I'll stay."
This girl was starting to annoy him. He didn't want to do it but he had no choice so crouched down a bit and jumped up onto her window. She had already moved back so he didn't have to tell her move out of his way so he could pull himself up. Her room was pretty simple, a queen sized bed, books and paper everywhere, some clothes scattered here and there and two doors. One was opened so he knew that it was the door to her bathroom and the other he assumed was for the stairs.
"So you can jump super high?"
He stopped looking at her room and looked at her. If looks could kill... he'd be six feet under cause this woman was gorgeous.
"Yeah I can jump super high, is that a problem?" He didn't mean for it to come out so rude, but he was trying to hide how stunned he was by her.
"No that isn't a problem, but your attitude is." Kagome crossed her arms and glared at him.
This wasn't the way he wanted to do this. He was supposed to be acting like a prince.
"You're right forgive me. Let's start over, I'm Prince Inuyasha and I'm here to rescue you Princess Kagome."
Kagome took a moment to really look him over. He was tall, definitely had silver hair that looked longer than hers, and dog ears? Well no wonder he could jump like that.
"I take it your a dog demon." She said after a little time.
"Yes I am, but I'm only a half demon."
"That explains how you were able to jump up here like that. Why didn't you just do that from the start?"
He wanted to do it, believe him. "I wanted to do things the traditional way."
"Take it from someone who knows, the traditional way isn't always the best way."
Inuyasha was beginning to understand this girl... kind of. At first her mocking attitude and constant sarcasm were a bit irritating but now it was starting to make sense. From what he could see most of the books she had in here were fairy tales and she must have read them a dozen times by now. Those stories were silly for the most part and he could see why she didn't act like your average princess.
"You've been in here for ten years right?" He asked.
"I've been in here since I was six and I'm eighteen now, so it's actually been twelve years."
"What do you do in here? Hell, what do you eat?"
Kagome took a seat on her bed and he followed. "Don't you know that it's impolite to sit on a person's bed without permission?" She asked when he sat next to her.
"That sounds like a traditional way of thinking and coming from someone that hates tradition it's surprising."
"What's traditional about manners?"
"Everything."
Kagome was starting to like this guy. He was a prince that didn't act all that princely and she was a princess that sure as hell didn't act like a princess. They were a match made in Hell.
"Fair enough Prince Boy."
"Prince Boy? That's really what you're going to call me?"
"Is it a problem?"
"No that isn't a problem, but your tone is."
"Throwing my words back at me? How original are you?"
"I'm very original actually. I live in a castle, my mom and dad are a king and queen, I've got girls falling at my feet and I was sent to rescue a princess from a tower."
Kagome laughed at how he described himself as a very unoriginal fairy tale prince. And he wasn't even finished.
"Not only that but I occasionally fight dragons and ride horses into sunsets."
"You know you actually managed to impress me. It's not easy to make me laugh."
Inuyasha rolled his eyes and dusted his shoulders. "Of course I did, I am a prince."
Kagome got an idea. It was rather silly but she just couldn't resist. She stood up from her bed and went over to the dresser she had where her radio was placed. Laughing silently at the confused look on his face she turned it on and held out her hand to him.
"Dance with me Prince Boy."
Inuyasha stood up slowly from the bed and walked over to her. He surprised her when he took her outstretched hand and pulled her into him so that they were nose to nose.
"You know how to dance?" He asked in a whispered voice as he wrapped his arms around her waist.
"I mean... I am a princess." There was nothing but a pins worth of space between them and it was making her heart race.
He noticed how nervous she was getting and he decided to tease her about it. "Am I making the princess nervous?" He pulled her even closer.
"I don't get nervous. The only ones to get nervous over guys are those girly love struck princesses in fairy tales. Are we gonna dance or are you going to hold me like this all day?"
He smirked at her and started moving them to the beat of the song. She was starting to get annoyed at the tingly feelings he was causing her to have. She wasn't an average princess that swooned over the prince that was supposed to save her. Hell she didn't even need to be saved considering that there was a way out. She just chose not to take it because the stairs didn't even look like they could support the weight of a feather. And the window? Fuck that. Also, it's not like she didn't want to leave, she was tired of being stuck in this tower with the same things to do everyday. She just didn't want to be considered a damsel in distress upon getting out.
"What's on your mind princess?" Inuyasha asked after a long while of silence between them.
"You didn't decided to come here on your own. Who sent you?" She asked and placed her hands on his chest so that she could look up at him. Bad, bad, bad decision. His chest felt wonderful under her hands and his eyes were such a hypnotic gold.
"That's what you were thinking about all this time?"
"No it wasn't. Who sent you?"
"You didn't answer my questions from before."
"What did you ask me?"
"What do you do in here? What do you eat?"
"I dance, obviously, and read. Sometimes I draw or sing and when I'm really bored I spend the day looking out the window. As for eating, I eat fruits and vegetables and other things like that. You're about to ask me where I get them from and my answer to that is that I don't know. It isn't my responsibility to fill in the plot holes." (Wrong! I know that you all were thinking that just because Kagome said this it automatically makes me her. Well no, it just means that Kagome is a super smart girl.)
"Has anyone else ever tried to rescue you?"
"Answer me first. Who sent you?"
"My parents sent me. After my nineteenth birthday they told me it was time to find myself a wife and told me to come here and rescue you."
"That makes no sense. They sent you to rescue a random girl in a tower in the middle of nowhere?"
"You weren't all that random. They gave me some information before I came here. Like your name, age, parents, and how long you've been here. Some of it is clearly incorrect though."
"Clearly. Who are my parents?"
"Are you asking me that to test me, or to remind you?"
How sad was it that she could barely remember her parents? Maybe it wasn't all that sad considering that they probably forgot about her as well. She couldn't understand what possessed them to keep her in this tower all alone for all of these years. Inuyasha stopped their dance and led the two of them to her bed again so that they could sit.
"This might sound crazy a little crazy at first so just try to keep up with me. There is a tradition for all of the female members of your family. At the age of six the girl would be kept in a tower that was well hidden until she was eighteen and after that her parents would find a prince that they deemed suitable to rescue her."
God her life so frustrating! Who in the hell came up with that crap? "Can you stop using the word rescue? It makes me sound like a fucking damsel in distress."
"Someone's got a potty mouth. What word should I use instead?"
"How about we call it 'helping me get out'. And oh please, don't act like you never cuss. I know for a fact that you do."
"I cuss all the time and I get scolded the same amount. As a prince I shouldn't use foul language because it makes me look bad. That's what I was told at least."
"Well as someone that's been locked away for years I could honestly care less how it makes me look."
"I've noticed."
"Noticed what?"
He leaned into her and pinched a lock of her hair. "I noticed that even though your supposed to be a princess you don't act like one. In fact you hate princesses that fall head over heals in love with princes that they just met. Although as tough as you act you can't hide one thing." He let go of the hair that he had between his fingers and grasped her chin. "You're a woman, Kagome. A woman with feelings and desires and it's completely natural."
Kagome was torn between wanting to punch him and possibly kiss him. How does one go from being sympathetic to casual to flirty? And she thought she had mood swings.
"Back up Romeo, shouldn't you buy me dinner first?" Kagome put a good amount of distance between them.
"I guess I could do that. It'll have to be after we take care of something first though."
"Take care of what?"
"I have to take you to see my parents."
"We aren't even dating and you already want me to meet your folks."
"We're engaged Kagome that's as good if not better than dating."
Hold up. "Excuse me? You and I are what?"
"We're engaged. Didn't you hear me when I told you about your family's history?"
"Oh I heard you, but I must have missed the part about not having a choice in anything that has to do with my life!"
"You're a princess. You should've expected this."
She was a princess, and as one she was going to start making a few changes.
"How fast can we get out of here?" She asked.
"That depends, you want to use the stairs or do you want to use the window?" He stood up from her bed and found a pair of shoes for her to wear.
"Will I be on your back or something using the window?" She slid on the black flats he handed her and followed him to the window.
"Yeah I'll carry you on my back."
"Window please."
..x..
My – I mean her mother was so freaking gorgeous that Kagome was finding it hard to believe she was from the same family. Her name was Suki Higurashi and a quick description about her is that she had shoulder length black hair, dark brown eyes, pale white skin, she was kind and the had the sweetest smile. If Kagome didn't know any better, she'd believe that her mother actually was the angel that she was pretending to be. When Kagome and Inuyasha got to Inuyasha's house (-cough- castle -cough-) they were going to go straight to his father's study when they arrived, but they ended up running into her mom in the hallway instead.
"Are you on your way to see Izayoi and Inutaisho? They aren't in the study I just checked myself. I believe they are in the throne room along with Kenta. Would you like to check with me?" Suki didn't even give either of them a chance to answer before she continued walking down the hall. Inuyasha took Kagome's hand and followed behind her while maintaining some distance.
"What the hell was that?" Kagome asked in a hushed voice.
"What the hell was what?" He asked and drew back a little more.
"Does she not know who I am? I was expecting some tear jerky reunion, not the cold shoulder."
"I don't know what to tell you. The Higurashi's aren't know for being as sweet as they appear."
He didn't have to say anything, she was going to have the most to say in a few minutes or so.
"Who is Kenta?"
"Your father."
Of course he's here too. The locked away princess has finally been rescued and now they all think it's time to plan the wedding and future babies. They'll get their wedding, and they may even get their baby, but it won't be without a price. Suki opened the door to the throne room and before Kagome could march in afer her, Inuyasha pulled her back and pushed her against a wall.
"What is it with you and being up against me?" She asked and put her hands on his chest to keep him at a distance.
"Don't go getting your mind stuck in the gutter it's not like that. I just wanted to know what you're planning."
"What are you talking about?"
"Don't play dumb. I can tell by the look on your face that you're about to go in there and make all hell break loose. And normally I wouldn't stop anyone that wants to spice things up around here, but with you I'm a little scared."
"And why is that?"
"Because," He smirked and leaned down to kiss her. It was only a peck but there were so many meanings behind it and it had Kagome's face as red as a monkey's ass. "As cliché as it is I like you a lot and I'm not ready for you to get put back into that tower just because you're pissed off and need to say something about it."
"You know how much I hate love at first sight stories."
"Who say anything about love? I just met you. I'd call what I feel for you right now a crush if anything."
"Fair enough, I just might have a small crush on you too."
He laughed and pressed his forehead against hers. "A small crush? Don't lie you know how much you wanted to jump my bones back in that tower."
"What are you two still doing out here? We're all waiting for you." Suki said from the door.
Kagome sighed and pushed Inuyasha off of her. She'd try to act like the princess she was supposed to be for Inuyasha's sake, but if they said something she didn't like they wouldn't be ready for what she had in store for them.
"Oh my goodness, you're prettier than I imagined you'd be." A lady sitting on a throne said with long jet black hair and dark brown eyes.
Strike one. Kagome assumed that this woman was Inuyasha's mother.
"Yes she grew up to become a fine looking woman. Just right for our son." A man sitting on the other throne said with long silver hair up in a high ponytail and golden eyes said while looking her over.
Strike two, and uh, CREEP ALERT. He had to be Inuyasha's father.
"Could you two please stop insulting her?" Inuyasha asked and gave them a warning look.
"Relax Inuyasha, they weren't insulting her. How was the tower Kagome?" The person that spoke this time was a man with the same face and eyes as Kagome. He must've been her father, Kenta.
Oh and strike three. Did he really just ask her how that freaking tower was?
"Well if you must know I've had better times cleaning out my shit clogged bathroom than–" Inuyasha's hand flew over to cover Kagome's mouth.
"Kagome! Please watch your mouth. I know that you were in the tower for a few years and didn't get a proper training on how to behave, but you must know that language like that is unacceptable." Suki scolded.
"Uh foo fuhking ears?" Kagome tried to move Inuyasha's hand away from her mouth but he wasn't budging.
"Oh my the two of them seem to have the same problem with cursing. Darling what should we do?" Izayoi said with a worried expression.
"Inuyasha is learning and knows better than to keep using that type of language. This Kagome on the other hand needs to be taught as soon as possible." Inutaisho said with a disapproving glance at her.
Kagome thought she was going to have to bite Inuyasha's hand off to speak but he ended up doing it for her.
"Are you guys kidding me? She was locked away in that tower for twelve years! How was she going to learn the proper way to be a princess all alone? I'm surprised she even knew she was a princess."
"We left her books about other princesses and also notes that we wrote ourselves so she would know why she was in the tower." Suki said.
"How the hell are a couple sheets of paper a suitable substitute for having parents?" Inuyasha was as fed up as Kagome with all of this royal prim and proper bullshit and he needed to say something. He took his hand off of her mouth and looked at every adult in the room as he spoke. "And who came up with that? Locking a child in a tower until some random stranger makes it there to save her? What happens if no one wants to make that trip to get her out? Would you just leave her there all alone to rot?"
"That is enough! I demand that you apologize to the Higurashi's this instant! And after you've done that you can go up to your room and wait until your father and I decide what to do with you." Izayoi said as she stood from her throne, practically fuming.
"Look out Inuyasha you made them mad." Kagome laughed.
"Do you find this amusing?" Inutaisho asked.
"Only a little... okay no I'm lying. This is freaking hilarious!" Kagome doubled over in laughter.
"Let's see if you find this funny. I hereby banish you from my kingdom and I forbid you from seeing my son again!" Inutaisho said.
That shut Kagome up. She didn't want Inuyasha to be taken away from her.
"Aren't you being a bit childish? All she did was laugh." Inuyasha said.
"You two would know all about being childish wouldn't you? I agree with what Inutaisho has done I also forbid your from seeing my daughter and stepping foot in my kingdom as well." Kenta said and started making his way out with Suki beside him. "We can finish talking about the trade deals tomorrow Inutaisho, for now I think it'd be best if we took Kagome home."
It was clear that they were expecting her to follow behind them like a puppy. Shame on them for not knowing her by now.
"Inuyasha, what's that classic cliché thing about lovers being torn apart?" Kagome asked and inched closer to him so that she wouldn't have to speak loud enough to be heard by everyone.
"Let's go Kagome." Suki said and looked back at the two of them.
"The lovers end up running away together." Inuyasha said back and took her hand while glancing at the knowing look on his fathers face. He had heard them and knew what they were planning.
"Guards! Stop them! Don't let Inuyasha out of this castle and escort Princess Kagome out immediately!" Inutaisho stood up from his throne and watched his guards come rushing into the throne room.
"Come on let's go this way." Inuyasha pulled Kagome to the corner of the room and pressed a part of the wall where a secret passage was hidden.
"Wonderful, another cliché. Hidden passages in the wall." Kagome joked and ran with Inuyasha down the passage with the guards behind them.
"You'll learn to love them. I've picked up a few escape skills because of them." Inuyasha pulled Kagome in between a space in the walls and watched the guards run past them.
"You've got to be kidding me." Kagome whispered, amazed at the stupidity of these guys.
"I'm not kidding you. That trick actually works." Inuyasha looked back and forth once before he made his way to another passage with Kagome. The two of them ended up outside in a stable with horses.
"Take your pick. I doubt anyone will notice that one of them is missing for a while." Inuyasha said and made his way over to a corner of the stable.
Kagome watched him dig through the hay for a second and pull out a large black backpack. Then she looked back at the horses and went to one that was white with a black mane and tail. It watched her as she approached it and it nuzzled her hand when she reached out to pet it.
"Good choice, his name is Talon and he's one of our best." Inuyasha said from behind her now.
"What's in the bag?" She asked and continued to pet Talon.
"A few necessities we'll need like money and clothes and food if we're going to be on the run for a while." Inuyasha let Talon out and started getting him ready to leave.
"This might just be enough to start a war over."
"What do you mean?"
"A princess that has a temper and a potty mouth and a loud mouth prince run away together after being forbidden to see each other again. Eventually their parents will get mad and blame each other for the children running away and BAM. A war."
"I don't believe that is going to happen at all. You ready now or do you want to fantasize some more?"
Kagome punched him the shoulder and they rode off into the sunset together and lived happily ever after.
..x..
... HA SIKE! Let me tell you what actually happened. Inuyasha and Kagome did ride off together and they found a little cabin in the woods to live in. Spooky right? Well it was, especially at night, but they were happy and together and it was really close to a village where they both got jobs at a clothing store. As for what happened at home, the two of them were deemed runaways and traitors and they weren't allowed to set foot back into either kingdom again which was a little extreme if you asked them but they also didn't care. Who wanted to live with people that were so controlling and manipulative anyway? Anyway, a few years later the owner of the store passed away and Inuyasha and Kagome took over for him since he didn't have any family that he was close to (see why they got along so well).
Not much else going on these days except that Inuyasha and Kagome got married and had a baby! They named her Rayna and after a long and serious talk they wanted to keep up with the Higurashi family tradition and lock her away until a prince could rescue her. Joking again, hello, they were banished and lost their titles remember? So there would be no prince since Rayna wasn't a princess. They did however take little Rayna to play princess in the tower that Kagome grew up in because it was a nice place to spend time together as a family. And that's where we are now, that's right we. It was me, Kagome, narrating this entire time and you guys never knew!
I think they knew Kagome. And you weren't alone, you just never let me talk while you were telling the story.
Go away Inuyasha! I'm trying to end this long ass story about a gorgeous princess and her weirdo prince.
You're calling me a weirdo? Maybe you should read this story again.
I haven't done anything weird.
Are you sure about that?
As sure as I am about how adorable you were when you called out to me to let down my hair.
Shut up! This story is over!
You don't end my story I do! Goodbye everyone! Thanks for reading!
..x..
-I know that this was weird, that was the point.
-I know that the parents were OOC, that was the point.
-I know that fairy tales aren't like this, that was the point.
-I know that it didn't make a lot of sense, that was the point.
I just wanted to make my own version of a fairy tale and here it is xD as for anything that was missing like how she gets her food or whatever other questions you might have... I'll leave it up to your imagination because like Kagome, the plot holes aren't my job!
Well they are but not today lol.
REVIEWS ARE LOVE!
XxSilverBellxX