Pre War

Steve Rogers was your classic skinny kid living in Brooklyn facing what every teenager faces when they enter high school. Accept Steve faced it along with extreme asthma, nonstop colds and scarlet fever, high blood pressure, and a burning passion to serve his country. There was also the minor detail that everybody found a reason to pick on him: he wasn't good at talking to girls, he hadn't grown into his own skin yet, he was really good when it came to grades so that branded him a nerd, and since he was so small it made it easier for the sports to "coerce" him into doing to their homework and reports. The list goes on.

But despite all of this, Steve didn't mind all that much. He had that "spark" inside him that some people search all their life for. That thing that drives them to be the best they could possibly be, even if it made him an easy target... Which leads to the story that you're about to read.

Steve attended George Washington High School in Brooklyn, NYC, the year was 1935 his junior year. He really wanted to be an artist and aspired to go to Auburndale Art school when he was done. But he first had to survive high school, some of the most traumatic and emotionally straining times in a persons life; but this was only high school, and the world was falling apart, so why should it care about just another teen's social issues?

Steve was walking home one day when some of his least favorite people began walking up behind him.

"Hey, Rogers!" Oh no, it's them again. Their words alone made poor little Steve's heart beat faster than it should. "How's my report coming along? It's due in two days ya know?"

"Y-yes, McGuire, I know. It's not that easy though. I'm not taking anatomy so I have to study up more than usu-OW!"

"I don't want excuses, Rogers, I want that essay in two days or else your face is gonna get real aquianted with my fist." Being that he was the kid who didn't know when to back down from a fight, Steve mustered all his strength and socked Johnny McGuire right in the jaw. He had a real bad habit of picking fights he didn't have a chance in hell of winning, but that was Steve for ya. That fire just didn't know when to quit, but then again, it never wanted to. It wanted to show people that even the little guys could win.

McGuire proceeded to shove Steve down hard, then punch him in the rib, outer thigh, and again in the face. Steve was mentally preparing himself for another smack to the head, when he heard a scuffle from behind his closed eyes.

"Back the hell off, Barnes, this ain't your fight!" Chided one of McGuires compatriots.

"Yea, I know, but three guys against this punk wouldn't be fair. I'm only returning the favor; for your sake." James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes, Steve's true pal since their school yard days. No one could fight like Bucky could, four guys, five, even six one time and he never even broke a sweat. Bucky was a real fighter. He was tough as nails and had a will stronger than iron. He was everything little, "Wheezie Stevie" wasn't. He never hated or resented Bucky for it, he just wished he could join his friend on that level.

"Get outa' here before I break your nose like last time, McGuire. Or don't you remember?" Bucky cracked his knuckles and gave him his famous glare that could rock anyone to their core. The gang backed off.

Steve straightened his jacket out and fixed his hair, he jumped when his friends hand placed itself on his shoulder. "Whoa, relax pal, it's just me. I ain't the one you gotta watch out for." Bucky dusted his friend off a bit more then started walking with him. "Why do you do this to yourself huh?"

"You can't let them beat you, Buck. Even it means a few bruises."

"I get that whole righteousness thing but, kid, you can't take anymore bruises."

"I at least gotta try, Bucky!" Steve knew it was sometimes hard for his friend to wrap his head around because he never had this issue, but it never stopped Steve from trying.

"You're the biggest punk I know, you know that?" Bucky wrapped his arm around his pal and smiled smugly as they began waking back to Steve's house. "Ya, and you're the biggest jerk I know, so I guess we're even." The boys walked on and laughed.

The gang left Steve alone for the next couple of days after he handed McGuire his anatomy report, but mostly because of Buck's ever growing presence. Truth be told, Steve didn't mind getting to be around Bucky more. Now that they were so close to leaving for the real world, and with the world heating up with the threat of war, Steve was afraid of losing his best friend. Bucky was really the only friend Steve had ever had and probably ever have; the idea of losing him tore him up inside, but he could never show how much it did to Buck.

The two walked through the halls of school and talked and laughed. Bucky set up a date with a girl from homeroom and tried to get Steve in on the action with her cute friend but it became obvious that neither party was interested and Bucky accepted the defeat, but demanded there be a double date in the future... but not even that was to happen.

It had been raining all week; the thunder storms were horrendous. Several electrical grids were knocked out and the school lost power a few times during the day. Steve kinda liked the rain, even though he physically couldn't stand the cold, he loved listening to the rhythmic pattering of the raindrops on the pavement and the sound of the thunder rolling far off in the distance. He especially loved the color. Those subtle hues of blue hiding in the gray skies and the flashes of white from the lightning. It was a tradition between the two boys to get together when it rained since Steve needed extra warmth and it was fun to talk with the mellow mood set by Mother Nature. Bucky had his date this afternoon with Dot at the parlor so Steve was on his own for the walk today.

He was on his way home with his hands shoved deep in his coat pockets with the collar turned up trying to keep as warm as possible so he wouldn't get a cold like last time. His cheeks were pink from the cool wind and socks slightly soggy from misreading puddles that pooled in the ever cracking New York streets.

"HEY! ROGERS!" Oh no, Steve thought. It was McGuire. "What's with you trying to get with my girl?" He yelled forcing Steve to stop in his tracks since he knew he had no chance of out running a prized athlete; the bully wasn't alone either. Steve turned enough to see that McGuire had two friends and they all had a girl on their arm. They cornered him into an alley, only a block from home... typical.

"Did you hear me, Runt? I said whats with you trying to get with my girl the other day?" McGuire grabbed him by the collar and shook him to drive in his point.

"I didn't do anything," Steve tried to argue between thrashings, "Buck had a date and he tried to set me up."

"Don't lie to me!" McGuire punched his nose, knocking him down which caused him to hit the back of his head. His vision went a little blurry. McGuire got in his face, "I don't wanna EVER hear about you making no more moves on my girl, Runt!" Steve glared into his eyes and did something really stupid: he spit blood into McGuire's face. The bigger boy proceeded to knock the daylights out of little Steve, all while his friends were cheering and the girls giggled. Dot's friend, apparently McGuire's girl, taunted poor Steve.

"Like any girl would wanna go out with a pathetic like you! You're probably one of those faggot! Go on and have sex with your faggot boyfriend." She yelled as McGuire bashed Steve into a huge puddle.

"Oh wait, Janie," chimed in another girl, "I bet the loser doesn't even have one!" Everyone laughed in poor Steve's face as he was completely soaked now, his nose bleeding heavily, and feeling lower than he ever had before. The names also struck a personal nerve that no one ever knew: Steve was actually attracted to guys and girls, but mostly guys. He'd actually been in love with the same person ever since he was a kid, but they never knew, and Steve wanted to keep it that way because he was afraid he'd lose that friendship.

"Wait, did we break up?" Bucky appeared out of no where. Everyone shut up and stared, "I sure hope not." He began walking confidently towards McGuire.

"Cut the shit, Barnes. I know you've nailed five chicks in the last two months. I know you ain't no fag!" McGuire got in his face with a smug grin across his mouth.

"Well, I guess I just have to prove myself." Buck strode over to Steve, picked him up and held him in his arms. Time suddenly slowed till it almost stopped. Bucky's eyes reminded steve of a rainy sky. They were gray with blue. Steve had never been this close to Bucky before; he'd never noticed but he had a little stubble starting to grow on his chin. Steve's head went blank as Bucky leaned in and nearly gave him a heart attack when their lips met. All Steve could hear was the rain, but he didn't feel cold anymore. All he could feel were Bucky's arms wrapped around him and his lips pressed against his. Steve had never kissed anyone before but he felt like he knew kissing Bucky. Steve took in what were only seconds and breathed everything in and when Bucky moved away, Steve actually whimpered but only loud enough that Bucky heard it. That confirmed it, for him at least.

"Now, if you'll all excuse me, I've gotta get my dear little Stevie here out of this rain." Everyone gawked as the two walked away.

"HA! You're such and idiot, Barnes! Now I'm gonna tell everyone that you two are faggots!" McGuire screamed as the rain began to come down hard.

"That may be true, but at least I don't have to worry about my partner spreading around something rather nasty." Janie suddenly turned pale. "Ya that's right. I hate to stoop to your level but your girl there got a little souvenir from your pal Riley there. Ya, I know she's been sneaking around and probably gave it to you too." Steve witnessed something, almost dark and evil blend themselves into Bucky's words, "Now, you will all walk away from this and not say another word to me, or Steve ever again. No more reports, homework, framing, nothing. Or this fag will tear your world, and you, limb from pathetic limb." The two walked away to Steve's house in total, and amazingly awkward silence.

Bucky helped Steve gingelry pull off his soaked jacket and stop the Steve's bleeding nose. He grabbed some bandages from the cabinet where Steve's mom, Sarah, kept them specifically for occasions such as this. "You are without a doubt the biggest punk I know." Bucky finally broke the silence but Steve couldn't bring himself to speak. Bucky continued to dress wounds that littered his body while keeping an eye on the pot set to boil for Steve's tea. "Sorry if I spooked ya, but you scare me sometimes. I thought he'd killed ya when I saw that much blood on your face and you lying on the ground when I first turned that corner."

"What happened on your date?" Was all that Steve could say.

"It just wasn't working for me."

"Why did you lie?"

"What about?" Bucky walked over to the kettle and began pouring the tea.

"You said you were..." Steve never dared to say a hurtful word like that, "You said you liked guys, but I know that's not true." Steve felt his chest tighten and the words getting stuck in his throat. Bucky stopped moving for a few moments, took a deep breadth and turned to walk directly towards Steve who was sitting at the kitchen table. Bucky's face was serious, deadly serious. Steve had never seen this look before, but there was something, so attractive about it. The way the light hit his cheek bones made them look sharper than normal and his eyes popped against his dark lashes. Suddenly Bucky was right in front of Steve, so close he could feel his breadth on his own lips.

"Steve," Was all that Bucky whispered before his lips came crashing onto Steve's. Bucky couldn't take it anymore, he couldn't keep hiding his real feelings, and for some reason, words couldn't explain. Steve was once again paralyzed by the sensation of Bucky's mouth against his, only this time, Bucky nailed him.

Steve knew little else about kissing other than puckering your lips and putting them against someone else's but boy did Bucky change all that. He moved his mouth, he opened his lips and nibbled on Steve's. Bucky placed his hands on Steve's shoulders, then his neck, his ears, hair, and back and rubbed back and forth between them all. Steve sat there bewildered. Suddenly, something made him snap.

"Stop it!" Steve used all his strength, which wasn't much at all, but pushed Bucky away and saw his face. "You really are a jerk! You knew! You knew all along and you're only doing this to make fun of me. You've had your fun now leave me alone!" Steve shouted and turned away with the threat of tears in his pink eyes and flushed cheeks.

"Steve." Bucky's voice was low, and hurt. "I'm not playing. I'm sorry if I made you think otherwise, but that's my fault. I should've told you sooner, and probably not like that." He slid down so he rested his weight on his knees and placed a hand on one of Steve's. "I really do. I really like you Steve, I have for an embarrassingly long time. But I'm not lying, I've never actually lied. I just hid behind what everyone assumed, and I'm sorry. I don't want to make you upset, I understand if you're disgusted with me and never want to speak or see me again but you have to know, that I truly like you, Steve..." Bucky paused to gather his courage, "I love you."

Steve couldn't hold back anymore, he lunged at Bucky and started to cry and pound at Bucky's chest, with not much force. "You're such a jerk! Such a jerk! Just... such sniff a jerk." Bucky wrapped his arms around Steve's small body and held him tight, God, he's so cold, Bucky thought to himself as Steve sobbed. He smiled and placed his mouth on the crown of Steve's head. His blonde hair was soft, and though he'd never told Steve this, he had a small birthmark hidden on his scalp that Buck found adorable. The two sat there on the floor of Steve's kitchen listening to the rain, and absorbing each other's heat. When Steve calmed down and Bucky felt that he'd reached a suitable temperature, Bucky cupped Steve's tear stained face and wiped the streaks away with his thumbs. Bucky kissed Steve once more, "I love you, punk."

Steve smiled so sweetly, "I love you too, jerk." The two heated up two more cups of tea, gathered some more blankets, and made their way to the parlor where they kissed, talked lazily, and dozed off in each other's arms.

Post War/Civil War

It was raining. It was a little bit different from 1935 but it was great nonetheless. Steve had managed to find an apartment in Brooklyn and was finally feeling settled in the 21st century. He'd gone on a run earlier but neglected to check the weather before going out. Somewhat tired, and with no other plans, he decided to walk home; it was only a block away. Steve donned a black windbreaker, some sweats, a red baseball cap that had been faded from sun exposure, and Nike sneakers. While walking he noticed some people staring. His media coverage hadn't quite faded yet and people were always stopping him with questions, for autographs or pictures, and things like that. One group of guys started to walk up to him, their leader looked like someone he once knew, but couldn't put a name to the face, "Oi, Rogers, you got no business being here. You and your damn no good friends ruined everything!" Many still blamed the Avengers for everything that happened not too long ago at Stark Tower.

"Especially your psychotic metal freak! I bet the reason you did what you did is because you're his bitch!" The group made noise in agreement. "Ya!" The man moved in closer, he reeked of booze, "I bet you're a fucking faggot!"

"Hey, everyone," yelled one from the group now further back, "Captain America here is a bitch boy!" Thank heavens there weren't as many people on the streets due to rain, but a few turned their heads yet carried on. "I bet he ain't even got a faggot boyfriend."

Steve noticed a dark figure moving towards them all. "What, does that mean we broke up?" Bucky stepped forward looking right at Steve, "I sure hope not." He smiled.

"How could you remember that day."

"I worked some stuff out in Wakanda." He winked, and Steve chuckled but was overwhelmingly happy. "Now, if you'd excuse us, my boyfriend and I have a long night ahead of us." The men walked on and laughed.

Back at the apartment, Steve begin to hit Bucky with all sorts of questions.

How long had he been iced? How did they help him reverse Hydra's mental blocks? How long did that take? How much did Bucky remember? Was it easy, or was it still difficult? Was Bucky even supposed to be here or did he escape again? Did he have to take any special medication or was medicine bad. He remembered reading something like too much medication isn't good for the body and that natural remedies were better, like plums which have been proven to help people with stuff like this, or did Bucky want to try something like that yoga or meditation stuff? What did he have to do or not do? How did they fix your arm? Is it still metal or is it some kind of prosthetic?

"A team managed to recover the plans to my arm after some searching while I was still under. Some scientists somehow were able to replicate the process and create a new one, but without that red star. Funny enough, it looked weird without something there so I had them put those wings that were on our uniforms during the war. They said it would take a while for me to process everything, but that I had already begun to do that on my own before everything that happened, was a good sign. I do need to take it slow but they brought in, Wendy? no Wanda, to help reverse whatever manipulations or fail-safes were left or still unknown to the scientists. I went to therapy, and they gave me a name of a therapist here in New York that has special clearance to continue my treatment. They told me not to get my hopes up too much because they believe some of my brain was damaged due to the wiping methods they used, and that some of my memories will return completely, others may never, but expect a lot of fragments,

Steve, I want you to understand. I do remember a lot of things now but with everything that's happened I need you to know that I'll never really be the same ever again. I just don't want to disappoint you but I needed you to know. I may relapse a little bit so I need you to be patient. I'm also still new to this time so I'm probably gonna be really slow on the uptake. But I'm gonna try, I am, Steve. I'm really gonna try, and I hope that you'll be there with me... till the end of the line." Steve grabbed Bucky's hand and pulled him into a hug.

"I don't care how long it'll take, because I know it's hard. Believe me, I went through this by myself but you don't have to. I'm here for you, Buck, and I'm not going anywhere." Bucky smiled and so did Steve. The rain pattered on the windowsill. It made Bucky remember something.

"Steve."

"Ya, Buck."

"Do you remember a day like this?"

"Of course, we always hung out on rainy days."

"No..." Bucky stepped a little closer, tilting his chin up slightly so that he was looking right at Steve. It still threw him that this was the same Stevie who was always sick or battered and bruised... well the bruising was still there but he could dish out now. But that didn't make Buck relax anymore than when they were kids. "No, Steve. A time like this." Bucky stepped in one more time so that their chests were touching. Steve blushed like a stop light. At least that hasn't changed. "Well, do you remember?"

He heard Steve gulp. "Y-yes."

"It's a little fuzzy..." Bucky licked his lips. "Refresh my memory, please." Steve's stomach flipped as he and Bucky leaned in for a kiss. It was good to see that a little of the old Bucky was still alive.

The two kissed while listening to the sound of the rain. Bucky and Steve heated up two cups of tea, gathered some blankets, and made their way to the parlor where they kissed, talked lazily, and dozed off in each other's arms.