So this is a little one shot idea I had and just had to write :) Hope you like it :)

*WARNING* Suicidal thoughts.

Snape's Tale

She's gone. That's it. My reason for living is gone. A light from the world has gone out tonight. How am I supposed to go on living when my reason for life is gone. Lily, my dear Lily is dead.

I know I shouldn't have but I had to go see her. She may have been with James and had Harry but I never stopped loving her, not one day. I've love her every day since we were ten years old and I saw her showing magic to her sister. Her fiery red hair and stunning green eyes had me from the start. And I ruined it.

I chose wrong, I chose the dark arts over her, the love of my life, my soulmate. After she got with James I tried to find someone else but there just was no one could compare to her. I didn't even see girls anymore, I would notice they were pretty but I always found a way to relate back to her. So I accepted the fact I was going to be alone, I even came to terms with it. Until I saw her again, then I was right back to square one. And now after seeing her cold, lifeless body I am done. This is it.

I'm standing on top of the astronomy tower and this is it. How am I supposed to go on? She never was mine but without her my life is nothing, meaningless. I don't know why I care so much, she belonged to James, loved him even. But still, seeing her made my day, it lit up my world. She lit up my world. And now she's gone so I must too. I can't stay here without her so I'll join her, James may be there but so is she. She can light up my afterlife. I have to join her.

I wonder if it's going to hurt, when I hit the ground? I don't care how much it hurts though if it means I'll be with her. She's my one and done. So if jumping will make me be with her I'll jump.

I'm sorry Lily, I know you'll be disappointed in me and right now you're probably looking down on me right now saying 'no, don't jump' but Lily, you don't understand, the pain in my chest, the hole, it's consuming. Jumping is the only way out.

I need you Lily, need you in my life and if that means not being alive then that's what I'm going to be. Dead.

"Severus don't, this isn't the way out."

"She's dead! What am I supposed to do? Just live without her?"

"That is exactly what you have to do. Cherish her memory. Remember all the good times. I know you love her and that you always have, that's obvious. So remember her, as someone who loved her."

"But how Albus? How do I live without her?"

"You have to find a way, it's hard, that I know. Each day is different, each day you need to find a new way to cope, to combat the feelings, the ones that have you standing on that ledge now. They do pass but you need to give them a chance, give yourself a chance to succeed."

"Succeed at what?"

"Life."

"What's the reason? There's none left without her."

"Voldemort wants to kill her son. How about protecting him? Keep her son alive and by doing that keep a part of her alive."

"Will that work?"

"You have to at least try it. It's what Lily would want. She wouldn't want you to do this."

"Don't. Don't say her name. Don't say what she would want. She made the ultimate sacrifice for love, why can't I?"

"You can't give up. She didn't give up did she? She fought until the end and you need to as well. Fight. Step off that ledge and fight like she did. Fight for as long as you can."

I feel myself step backward and I know Albus has won, tonight at least and because of him I'll live to see another day. I drag in a deep breath, was I holding my breath?

This will take a while to get over but now I am determined to live, to show Lily how good a man I can be. She can see me for who I am now so I'm going to show her.

Albus conjures a ball of light and exclaims "Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one just remembers to turn on the light."

Thanks for reading, a review would mean the world :)