Sheryl Crow – Make It Go Away (Radiation Song)

Kate Beckett was tired to the bone. Case files were scattered across her desk, and the white board had seen better days. It obviously hadn't been made to be erased and written over hundreds of time.

"Victim: Johanna Beckett" read the header on the board. Pictures of her mother's body were stuck to the board, ME reports, crime scene documents, witness interviews. No matter how many times she looked at it, the answer just wasn't appearing.

Kate put her forehead down on the file in front of her.

"Kate, honey, you need to come to bed," said a quiet voice behind her. She shook her head from side­-to-side, not lifting it from the desk.

"The answer is here somewhere, Will, I just have to find it."

"Honey, I'm sure it is. But I don't think it's going to appear tonight."

Resigned, Kate rose from the desk, looking back at the whiteboard before brushing past him out of the room.

"Damn you, Castle," Will Sorenson muttered. "Why'd you have to do this to her again?"

He turned a complete circle of her home office, looking at the four other whiteboards, the other victims Castle had matched to the M.O. of Johanna Beckett's murder.

"Why couldn't you have left well enough alone?" He sighed, turned off the light, and followed Kate to bed, knowing that neither of them were going to get any sleep tonight.
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Vivaldi: Cello Concerto in C Minor, featuring Yo Yo Ma

Kate had been asleep when the phone rang, dreaming something about unicorns and dragons. She grappled for the vibrating and ringing phone, running a hand through her hair as she flipped it open.

"Beckett," she murmured, trying to sound awake.

"Sorry to wake you Detective, but you have a call out," said Ryan's apologetic voice.

"Not a problem." She scribbled down the address he gave her as she climbed out of bed, yanking clothes out her closet as she hung up.

From there, it was the carefully choreographed ballet it always was. Water heated in the microwave, instant coffee stirred into her travel mug, the first careful sip as she slipped on her shoes and unlocked the gun safe in her nightstand, strapping on her gun and badge last thing on the way out the door.

Shutting the door behind her, she headed for the stairs, preferring not to wait for the elevator.

"And here we go again," she said as she headed down the stairwell, the coffee clearing the last of the fog from her head.

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Genesis – Jesus He Knows Me

Rick Castle knew when he was beat. He just didn't like to admit it.

Before he met Kate Beckett, his life was neatly compartmentalized. Women were good distractions, writing was how he made money, family was all important.

Now everything was tangled together. Kate had become part of his writing, she was considerable more than just a distraction, and slowly she was worming her way into his family. Not that she was doing it herself, if anything he was pulling her into his family life while she dragged her feet reluctantly.

He looked up at the altar of the church they were standing in, the murdered priest laid out in the first pew, wondering if he should take the time to return to church. Maybe God would help him untangle the confusion.

"You getting religion, Castle?" Beckett asked him. He jumped in surprise. Great, now she was sneaking up behind him.

"I'll have you know, Detective Beckett, that many women have told me that I am a religious experience myself."

She snorted. "And here I thought your ego couldn't get any bigger. I stand corrected."

Castle grinned at her, she grinned back, and he decided that all was right with the world. No need for divine intervention, the more time he spent with Kate Beckett, the better his life would become.

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Wicked The Musical – Defying Gravity

Richard Castle was sitting on the bumper of her unmarked car as an EMT looked over his chest. He had been hit square in the vest by a bullet from a charging suspect, a suspect that laid under a sheet off to the side. Kate's aim had been better than the perp's; her first shot through his forehead, second through his throat. She had surrendered her piece to Esposito pending the IAB investigation.

Castle was joking with the EMT as she poked at his chest when the first wave of nausea hit Kate. She slid down the building's brick wall into the mud of the alleyway, not really caring what she might be getting on her jeans and coat. She rested her forehead on her knees, trying to breathe calmly.

"Katie?" came Castle's voice. She turned her head sideways to focus one eye on his shirtless figure. The large purple bruise from the bullet's impact glared at her. "Katie, you okay?"

"You do know that if that bullet had been an inch higher, it would have missed your vest and hit you right in the throat, don't you Castle?" she asked.

He looked down at his chest. "Yeah, but it didn't, did it?"

"You also know that you are not indestructible, right?" The last two words came out as a sob and Kate wasn't sure who was more shocked, her or Castle.

"Kate, really, I'm okay. Believe me."

Kate snorted through her tears, turning her head away. "So help me God, Castle, if you get yourself killed on my watch…"

"I know, I know, the Mayor, the Chief, they'll all be on your case. But I did sign a waiver."

She looked back up at him, dumbfounded that anyone smart enough to write more than a dozen best sellers could be so clueless. She stood up, ignoring his outstretched hand.

"That's right, Castle. It's all about the job," she ground out.

She walked away. His hand on her arm stopped her and she felt him move closer to her.

"If it's not all about the job, Kate, then what is it all about?"

Kate suddenly felt as if the ground had dropped away beneath her. That she had the choice between falling and flying. She turned to look him in the eye as he waited eagerly, expectantly…and chose to fall.

"That's it, Castle, that's what I am. The job. And I don't want any of my team, including annoying writers, getting hurt."

His face crumbled as she walked away, the ground feeling very hard beneath her feet.

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Mamma Mia/ABBA – S.O.S.

Rick Castle looked around the bedroom he had shared with his wife, noticing how what was missing told the story of her leaving. Her journal gone from the bedside table, the makeup from the vanity.

The closet doors hung open, with the exception of the tiny corner closet that contained his clothes. Wandering over he noticed that she hadn't left a single shoe or hanger. Everything was gone.

He sighed, left the room, closing the door behind him. He had a child to raise, and no amount of begging was going to bring Meredith back from the glittering life she was expecting to live in Las Angeles.

Maybe someday he would meet someone who could fill the hole she had left in his heart.

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Lady Gaga – Eh, Eh (Nothing Else I Can Say)

Kate Beckett slammed the apartment door behind her. She had gained access by flashing her badge at the landlord.

Will was definitely gone. Everything had been removed from his apartment, down to the bare floors. Apparently the last fight about his move to Boston had actually been the last fight of their relationship.

She dialed her voice mail again, wondering why she was torturing herself.

"Hey Kate, I'm sorry to do it this way, but the position in Boston, I can't turn it down, it's too good. You can come see me if you want. It's not that far by train. You know I didn't really want to leave you. Not like this. But…what else can I say, right now my career has to come first."

The prerecorded voice came on: "End of messages. Press 7 to delete, press 9 to save."

Kate glared at the phone, then pressed the 7 harder than was strictly necessary.

"Message deleted, no new messages."

Maybe someday she would meet someone who would help repair the hole he had left in her heart.

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Silk Road Ensemble -- Akhalqalqi Dance featuring Yo Yo Ma

Standing in the middle of the room, feeling like a complete idiot, Kate wondered again how she had let Lanie talk her into a belly dancing class.

Sure, her regular workout (weights and treadmill) was feeling a little tired, but exactly how that translated into standing in a room full of women in a sports bra, shorts and a jingling scarf wrapped around her waist, she wasn't 100 percent sure.

"Isn't this great?" Lanie squealed over the vaguely Arabic music as she shimmied next to her. Kate, attempting to follow along, simply nodded.

Her pager vibrated, clipped to her waistband, and she snuck out of the group of gyrating women toward the entrance. To find herself face to face with Richard Castle.

"Castle," she managed to squeak. "What?"

Rick let his eyes roam her figure before coming to rest on her eyes. "Esposito called me. Said you might need a ride from your exercise class to the scene."

Beckett briefly considered pulling out her gun and shooting Castle, then tracking down Esposito and shooting him, before she remembered that her gun was locked up in the manager's office for safe keeping.

"I have to go change," she managed to say stiffly. "I'll be out in a few minutes."

"Don't change on my account, Detective, you look quite fetching as you are."

Kate actually heard herself growl over his laughter as she vowed to get back at Lanie, Esposito and Castle, not necessarily in that order.

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Joss Stone – Arms of My Baby

Kate Beckett breathed deeply, inhaling the scent of the man who held her close to his chest, hands running up and down her back, stopping just above the curve of her buttocks.

"God, Kate, I missed you," his voice rumbled against her ear.

"I gathered that from the 10 bouquets of roses I got over the last week," she teased gently. He pulled back, and Kate found herself drowning into Rick Castle's blue eyes.

"They couldn't possibly express how much I need you, Katie," he said. He leaned down to kiss her. As their lips touched, Kate felt herself melting into his arms as his hands slid farther south, pressing her against his…

"RING"

Alone in bed, Kate Beckett opened her eyes, sighed deeply, and reached for the phone.

"Beckett."

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U2 – Beautiful Day

Martha Castle wondered about her son sometimes. He was a successful writer, a good father, and a handsome man. Why was it he couldn't find the right woman to share his life with?

Then she met Detective Kate Beckett, supposedly Rick's model for his new character, Nikki Heat. Martha knew better. She saw the way Rick smiled in the mornings when he was going to spend the day at the station with Kate. Listened to him humming quietly to himself as he made breakfast for Alexis.

The first time Martha had met Kate, she knew. This was the woman for her Ricky. The woman that Rick had been waiting for. Well, hardly waiting, considering the two ex-wives and the who-knew-how-many previous conquests in his life. But the woman that for Rick would be forever.

If only the two boneheaded idiots would realize it.

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Nickelback – Animals

When it finally happened, it wasn't anything like Kate expected. After a tough case, she and her team, Castle included, went out for drinks.

When they dispersed, Castle had offered to share a cab with her, as neither were in any condition to drive. Sitting in the cab, she had become suddenly aware of how good the man sitting next to her smelled. Next thing she knew, they were kissing the daylights out of each other.

How they made it back to her apartment she had no idea, but she did know that she would never look at her elevator the same way after he worked his hand down the front of her jeans while she leaned against the wall.

They never made it to the bed, and she was afraid that she might permanently bear the imprint of her parquet tiles on her butt and knees.

Lying on the floor in the quivering aftermath, Castle reached out and stroked her face.

"This wasn't quite how I envisioned our first time together," he said. He sounded uncertain.

Kate rolled over and kissed him gently.

"Me either, but I'm not planning on it being our last time, either. We can try again. You know, later, I know you probably need some recovery time, a guy your age."

Castle's mouth dropped open, he stared at her, then laughed when he saw the laughter lurking in her eyes. He stood up smoothly, reached a hand out to her, helping her up.

"We'll just see about that," he whispered in her ear as she led him to her bedroom.

"I'm sure we will."