[A/N]: Gosh darn it. I'm so horrible at keeping this up. Last time I'm late, I promise. Enjoy.
xXx
The recent events had led Natasha to reminisce about the old days, something she rarely did, finding it a waste of her time, since you can't change anything with remembering. But sitting alone at the kitchen island and sipping her coffee, she did.
She'd been young when Clint brought her in. Of course, he had been too. She was maybe...nineteen? Twenty? She couldn't remember. What she could remember was that he was always nice to her, despite the suspicious glares and wary glances she got when she entered a room right after she'd joined S.H.I.E.L.D. He picked her up breakfast every morning, knowing she was never hungry right away when she got up, and only drank coffee. When they trained together, he never held back, but never fought excessively enough to actually hurt her (a refreshing change from the Red Room).
Then he'd requested to be her partner. At first, she'd been angry, thinking he didn't trust her to work alone. But the night after she'd stormed out of the room when he mentioned it, he found her, handed her a coffee, and proceeded to tell her why he wanted to be her partner. That he thought her fighting style was amazing and wanted to learn to fight alongside it, and that he felt he could trust her to have his back when things got rough. She didn't say a word, just let him talk, and afterwards she had felt much better.
They'd fought side by side countless times since. After a few rough starts, they now we're perfectly in tune with the other's fighting style. It was a good feeling, she'd realized, to have someone there to protect your back. She'd never had that before, only enemies.
They grew closer, and were best friends. She'd been the very first person from S.H.I.E.L.D. to meet Laura, and was the godmother of Lila, Cooper, and, most recently, Nathaniel. She'd always headed over to the farm when she had a few days off. The kids were always delighted to see 'Auntie Nat'. She taught them little things, like how to navigate with the sun, and sang them lullabies in Russian.
Things were different now. Whenever Clint was home, she never visited. Only when Clint was gone did she go see her godchildren. Laura never said anything to her, still smiling and greeting her warmly. The kids asked her why she was never around when Dad was, but she gave them vague answers like, "we're both very busy".
They hadn't talked, not since they'd been forced to choose sides. Natasha figured it for the best. She didn't want to argue; not over this. It was an important issue, she supposed, but she didn't feel it important enough to ruin their friendship over.
She sincerely hoped that it wouldn't, that something built on the foundation of over a decade of friendship couldn't crumble so easily.
But she wasn't sure.
And that was what kept her from picking up her phone to call him.
xXx
Inspired by Troye Sivan's song 'YOUTH'.