Broken, a tales of vesperia fanfic

They were ten.

They were ten and it was late at night. Yuri was curled up happily under a warm blanket, content with the meal he had tonight because last night he didn't eat at all. He tried not to come around too often at the Scifo house because he knew everyone was poor in the Lower Quarter and he didn't want to be a burden to the people he saw as family, whatever a family really was. Mrs. Scifo was still teaching him that.

But family stopped when he woke up to hearing Flynn downstairs yelling. Family stopped when he threw off that warm blanket, contentment gone and he ran down the stairs. Mrs. Scifo was crying and so was Flynn, wrapped in her arms.

Yuri stared, not sure why they were crying. In the doorway was a mournful knight, holding some very familiar weaponry in his hands. But he didn't understand. Why wasn't Finath carrying his own weapons?

What family Yuri had that night felt shattered, and he had no idea why.

~*My innocent mind*~

Mrs. Scifo explained what happened and Yuri cried. But Flynn didn't cry with him, because Flynn couldn't make any more tears. Even as he looked at Yuri who was also crying, he didn't have the will to cry anymore. Didn't have the life to say anything.

Didn't even reach out to hold Yuri as he cried. A simple comfort he could have given, but Flynn didn't have the strength. So his mother did it, and he could tell Yuri wasn't sure of how to react. The boy didn't understand family.

So why is he crying?

Flynn stared at Yuri, and slowly, the vapid stare became bitter. He was about to pull Yuri out of his mother's arms, demand he go away because Finath was his dad and Yuri didn't have the right to cry because he had no family; but Mrs. Scifo pulled Flynn against her too, and somehow her small, malnourished frame was big enough to shelter both boys.

And when he returned to the mourning warmth of her arms, Flynn found his will to cry and his broken heart again. He extended an arm to Yuri, and Yuri came closer to him.

But deep down, there was still some bitterness there, and Flynn wasn't sure why.

~*is struggling to find*~

Years go by and it doesn't get easier.

They get older and things aren't really better. Yuri doesn't feel like there's a family in the house, even as Mrs. Scifo basically makes him stay. And Flynn bottled up the bitterness and stayed close to Yuri, but he was no Finath. There was a void there in him and that bitterness was filling it up instead of Yuri's friendship. Flynn doesn't know why, but he can't put it into words. There's just something wrong.

They both know there is. Something broke that night and their young minds can't comprehend what it was or how to fix it.

But Yuri still held Flynn's hand as they play and Flynn still shares his bed with him so maybe things aren't so bad.

~*a glimpse of light*~

They decided to be knights like Finath but Flynn doesn't think Yuri will make it, because Yuri doesn't understand what it means to be a knight.

Sure he had the ideals, Flynn won't deny that. But Yuri lacked discipline. Just like Finath did, and that's how Finath got killed and left his family behind to pick up the pieces. And pieces were sharp, cutting Flynn into even more pieces, and now even the glue Yuri offered was failing.

They start to fight sporadically. Then a bit more. Then a few more times on top of that. And soon there was rarely a day they weren't yelling.

Yuri doesn't get it. That was his justification. But neither did Flynn, not that he'd admit that. At least he was trying. Yuri… he didn't think Yuri was trying.

And it just made him angry.

It was scary, having these sorts of feelings to Yuri. He used to love Yuri. He still did. At one point this boy was family, too. So why did it change? Flynn doesn't understand.

And neither did Yuri. All he knew was the one he thought he could depend on was leaving him, even if he was always there when he woke up. It was the worst sort of separation.

~*to touch your eyes*~

It's my fault.

But for some reason it was Flynn moving out.

Somewhere Yuri had messed up. Somewhere he had done something, said something, completely unforgivable. That had to be why. Why else were he and Flynn so rocky? He couldn't recall being mad at Flynn for anything outside of the fights, so obviously it had to be him… right?

So if it was him, why was Flynn leaving?

Sure, it was easier to attend the Knight Academy if he lived in the barracks. But that wasn't home. Didn't Flynn want to be home?

I'm making this not home to him.

Yuri tried to confront Flynn before he left. And when he asked, Flynn shook his head. Told him to take care of his mom. But Yuri kept insisting, kept asking, and soon they were fighting again.

"You don't get it! You'll never get it! I hate how you are!"

Yuri didn't understand. What about him made this happen?

It's not me.

So… what was it?

~*Drop the blame on my shoulders*~

Yuri was going to be a knight. Flynn figured that out because he was in the Academy and Flynn had no idea how that undisciplined idiot actually got in.

And then he avoided him the best he could because it wasn't fair he was judging him, but for some reason Flynn was struggling with not. Why was this guy who wasn't really family more like his dad than he was?

Am I the bad son?

Wasn't he the only son?

Flynn tried to shake the thoughts. Tried to give Yuri a chance because they were grown up now and Flynn had to be mature, because knights had to be mature. They had to be mature and fair and selfless and courteous. And then they could make a difference.

It was Flynn's fault things went sour. He should fix them. Somehow.

But when he tried to talk to Yuri, they end up fighting. It was always fighting. Why were they fighting? What was the point? Where did things goes wrong?

Somewhere, Flynn messed up. But he didn't understand how, or how to fix the pieces.

~*I will carry it far away from home*~

There was a touch of bitterness in Flynn's heart when Yuri left the knights. After all they went through, after all they finally got through, and they found that common ground they used to stand on. And then Yuri left.

Yuri understood Finath better than he did. Hell, everyone seemed to have. There was something, somewhere, from back then that made Flynn lose his understanding.

But since he was the one who messed up, who didn't understand and refused to, was afraid to… why was it Yuri leaving? Why was Yuri walking away?

Why do you shoulder the blame like this?

Flynn understood, deep down. But that didn't mean he liked it.