Quite awhile back I had been visiting Dulac, one of the many famous kingdoms in the land. I had held my breath upon approach, far too excited to be there for the first time. As I stepped through the silver wired fence, I brushed my ebony black hair behind my ears, leaving a red streak out to play with. As I twirled the crimson dyed hair around my pointer finger, My violet eyes flickered around. IT was rather hot outside that day, and it didn't help that I was clad in all black. My gauntlets made my arms heat up something awful, but they had matched my black and red hair very well that day. I remember when I had asked my mother to dye my hair for the first time she was super cool about it, though her voice had been laced with some motherly concern as she simply advised against it.
My black leather combat boots made quite a noise against the white stone streets of Dulac, standing out against the rather dull sound of heels clacking against it. In contrast, I was unique. But, clearly, as time passed, it showed others were not so. A stereotypical blonde girl seemed to float by my, clad in an unmodest pink skirt and a white tank top. Lip gloss shimmered on her lips as she blew me a kiss when she walked by. I assumed she was trying to mock me in some way, and I also assumed I was right. But it was okay, because I never bothered with basic bitches like her.
As my eyes flitted back to my front, I collided with some blurry green figure.
"Hey, what the hell man?" I argued as I pulled myself off the ground, dusting off my black skirt.
"Ah'm so sorreh, I didn't look where I was goin'." The thick accent took me off guard as I searched for my attacker's face. Woah.
His skin was dyed green (very committed to the entire scene look, I could tell), he had a super attractive button nose along with stunning mud colored eyes. His ear tubes extended a good three inches out of his head, allowing for superb sense of hearing.
He smiled as if to ease the pain of falling on the ground, and it did. As soon as I saw his slightly-yellowed teeth, I almost fainted. He had a great sense in fashion as well; he was dressed with a tinge of hipster, plaid leggings, leather vest, and potato sack shirt underneath. Not to mention the smell, he clearly used "Dirty Grandma Number Four: Ode to Hipster" perfume by Fall Out Boy. He was probably everything I've ever wanted rolled into one smelly green ball of sex.
Before I even got the chance to respond to his rather rude movements, he spoke in his thick slightly-Scottish accent.
"Hey, we should go out some time. You're pretteh good lookin'." The words were a symphony, but I didn't want to look desperate. I opened my mouth to speak, but was cut off short by the blonde who blew a kiss at me earlier.
"Oh. My. God. Shrek, I am your biggest fan!" She practically yodeled, making her way over. Only when she got closer did I realize she was actually wearing a Shrek t-shirt and a pink Shrek-printed skirt. Clearly she was his actual fan.
"Shrek, I love you FIVEever!" She exclaimed, latching onto his nicely fitted cowhide vest. After making movements to push her off, She clearly was staying on him. He charged a fist back before slamming It into her stupid blonde face. Whilst doing this he roared a mighty roar"
"I'm an Ogre!" He screamed, biting her neck. Blood oozed out of the wound as the girl fell to the ground, body twitching with tremours of shock.
"Don't worry, I took care O' her." He sniffed, wiping his nose on his shirt.
cowhide vest. Shrk punched her in the face "im an ORGER" he screamed.
Tbh I didn't really like sherk that much. I mwean sure he was the hottest thing since twinkies but like I liked gawyk skinny boys like micael cera. Like shrek wasn't that nerdy. Emo girls never flal in love with orgers.
"hey aren't you married to princess fion a man" I asked, biting my lip which had blacklipstick on. He grunted in response. "ugh I hate dthat bitch se never lets my handg tout eih tdonkehy, or puss."
I nodded, pulilng on my black tights with holes in them. "ugh yeah that s pretyy lame I guess." He nodded "Wannt go hang out?/" I nodded. What idid I have to lose?
But is tstsill felt pretty nice thast shrek liked me more than thatr stupudi prep girl .
Me an shrek walked throughout the dulac for like a whole ten minutes. Some cray cray donkey came up to us midway through, "hey shREK IM A DONKEY"
His scream scared me quite a bit, but shrek seemed cool and I currently trusted him with all my heart.