No one wants to be with me?, a ninja turtles fanfic

Hi guys! Been a while. You know, I'm surprised there haven't been more stories about the things said to Michelangelo during the events of The Gauntlet. This story wouldn't leave my mind until I typed it down.

Enjoy guys!

Michelangelo sniffed, pulling at fluff on his duvet as he laid on his side in his darkened room, the happenings of the day fresh in his mind. They were supposed to rescue Mr O'Neil from the clutches of the Kraang, and then they had to save the city from being mutated by the giant mutagen bomb on top of the Wolf Hotel. But it had all gone wrong. Sure, they'd saved the city and all, but Mr O'Neil was recaptured and, to top it all off, they'd come face to face with none other than the Shredder himself. Mikey shuddered, curling into himself, fresh tears spilling down his face at the remembered fear of nearly being squashed flat by the giant, heavy metal letter of the hotel's sign. There were times he was thankful he was a turtle and had a shell to protect him.

He sighed and rolled over to face the wall. The defeat wasn't what was bothering him. Heck, he may not be the smartest of the group, but even he knew there was no way they could have taken down the Shredder when they weren't prepared to face him. No, there was something else playing on his mind, echoing through it viciously and drawing more tears from his eyes.

"Don, hack into the system and see what you can find about the Kraang's plot. Raph, you're with me. Mikey, you stay with Donnie."

"Why do I always get stuck with Mikey?"

"Hey!"

"Well I don't want him, and I'm in charge."

"Hey!"

"Well, then make Raph take Mikey."

"Over my dead body!"

"You know, I'm starting to think that no one wants to be with me!"

Mikey sobbed and brought his knees to chest, hugging them closer and burying his face in them, fresh tears slipping from his tightly shut eyes. They hadn't denied his accusation, nor had they mentioned anything about it when they came home after telling Sensei about what had happened. No one even said anything about it as Donnie patched them up, almost as if all that had been said had slipped from their minds. It probably had. They probably thought nothing of it. But their words circulated around in Mikey's mind unchallenged, unhindered, with no words of comfort to chase them away. Was he really that annoying? Was he really so useless, so worthless to them? Sure he made mistakes, quite a lot of them actually, but for his brothers, his own family, to tell him that they didn't want him? And to do so right in front of him, paying no mind to him and his feelings...Mikey had felt his heart drop at the words spoken by his brothers. Drop and then shatter. Sure, he was quick to appear as if it didn't bother him, goofing off as usual, hitting the wrong button and setting off the alarm that drew the Kraang to them, which ended with them retreating up the rope and watching as Mr O'Neil was taken back by the Kraang droids. It had been all his fault. Raph's angered words still echoed in his head.

"And that's why no one wants to BE with you!"

A choked sob racked his body, leaving him shaking as he tried to fight it. If it hadn't been for him, April would have been reunited with her father by now. If it hadn't been for him, the rescue mission would have been so much easier. If it hadn't been for him…if it hadn't been for him, the Kraang might have been stopped by now. He sniffled. He ruined everything. All of Leo's well formulated plans, all of Donnie's experiments, all of Raph's attempts to control his anger. All because of his stupid pranks and his stupid...stupidity. He sniffed again, curling up further.

A knock on his door pulled him from his depressive thoughts. He remained quiet, hoping that if he ignored whoever it was, they would just go away.

'They don't wanna be with me anyway.' He shuffled further into himself, sniffling and allowing his tears to fall without care. The knock came again, this time accompanied by a voice.

"Mikey? C'mon bro, I know you're in there." It was Donatello. Mikey remained silent, mentally wishing his older brother would just go away. No such luck. His door opened, allowing his brother entrance.

"Mike? I've brought you some pizza." Mikey shifted, ignoring the alluring scent of his favourite food.

"Not hungry." His voice was muffled against his knees. He just wanted to be alone. Don frowned, entering his younger brother's room uninvited. It was hard to see with the light off, and he knew from experience that traversing his little brother's room was like crossing a minefield.

"Are you feeling ok? Why is it so dark in here?" Feeling along the wall, he clicked on the light switch, gasping and almost dropping the plate at the pathetic sight before him. Mikey was lying on his bed with his back to him, knees curled up and head hung low, the sound of sniffling reaching his ears.

"Oh Mikey…" He put the plate down and immediately made his way over, expertly dodging obstacles in his way, and perched on the edge of his bed. Resting a hand on his shoulders, he tried to get him to look at him.

"Mikey? What's wrong?"

"Go away." Don jerked back a little. Mikey's voice was so quiet, so despondent. This wasn't like him. He was usually a little ball of sunshine and energy, nothing ever got him down. Well, at least not to his knowledge. This was just so different that the genius was almost at a loss of what to do. A thought struck him. Could it be?

"Is this about the fight with Shredder? Listen Mike, I know we lost that and all, but we all made it back alive. That in itself is a victory, right?" Mikey shook his head. Don frowned, confused. What could have made his little brother be this way? He thought back over the fight. Nothing really unusual had happened, apart from losing of course, and Mikey almost being squashed flat. But that wasn't it. So what was bothering the usually upbeat Michelangelo?

"Mikey, please talk to me. I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong." Mikey shuddered, stifling a sob. Don heard it and watched as his brother shifted and pushed himself up and around, leaning back against the headboard, knees bent up and arms limply resting on his legs. Don gasped at the sight. Mikey's mask was soaked by tears, his normally bright blue eyes were dull and bloodshot. Mikey looked...empty, lost. He couldn't recall one time he had looked that way. The light blue eyes flicked to Don's and back down again, unable to keep contact. He sat silently, waiting for his brother to open up to him. It felt like an eternity had passed before Mikey began to speak.

"Why do you guys hate me so much?" Don flinched, completely taken aback. What? What was he talking about?

"We don't hate you, Mike." Mikey sniffed.

"But...you don't want me around." Where the shell was this all coming from? What possessed him to even think that?

"Of course we do…" Mikey shook his head, tears falling.

"No you don't. You all admitted it, right in front of me." He knew it, his brothers had forgotten. Now Don was really confused. When had they...oh.

"Mikey…" The younger turtle turned his head away, hiding his tears. Don bit his lip, guilt and sadness shining in his red-brown eyes, churning his stomach into knots. The memory came back to him. They'd all said that they didn't want to be with the youngster. Right in front of him. He mentally kicked himself. How could they? Mikey spoke again, his voice so small and timid.

"Why don't any of you want to be with me?" Don worried his lip more, words failing him. How could he comfort his only younger brother? When Mike got no response, he sighed and turned away.

"I really am that useless, aren't I? I really am so annoying and stupid and worthless and…" His words snapped his brother out of his daze, a concerned frown on his face.

"Mikey, stop it. You're not useless, you're not stupid and you're certainly not worthless. You might be annoying sometimes, but that's because you're our little brother." Mikey sighed, his shoulders slumping. Don kicked himself. 'Wrong thing to say, doofus!' With a sigh, he continued.

"Listen, Mike. You're our brother, and no matter what, we love you. Even if you can be annoying at times. You're my little brother, my only little brother, and you're my best friend. I'm sorry about what we said to you. We were stupid and ignorant. We didn't think before running our mouths off, none of us." The youngster sniffed again, not turning to his brother. Don shifted, placing a hand on the young turtle's shoulder and pulled him into an embrace. Resting his cheek on the orange masked turtle's head, he continued. "Michelangelo, listen to me. Forget about everything we said in that stupid control room. You mean more to me than anything else, and I will always wanna be with you." Mikey sniffled, tears flowing and hitting Don's plastron.

"R-really?"

"Really. Mike, without you, this place would be totally boring. You bring a certain amount of light to our home, to our lives, and without you, we'd fall apart."

"B-but...I'm not…"

"Hush and let me finish. You may not be the best fighter, but guess what. Newsflash, bro, neither am I."

"Yeah, but...you're the smartest guy I know. Raph's the strongest and Leo's, well, Leo's the level headed leader. I'm just the annoying little brother that get's on everyone's nerves and no one wants to be with." Don tightened his hold, his heart aching. His little brother sounded so small and scared, so lost and alone. What had they done to him? He growled a little to himself.

"If you believe that, you'll believe anything. You're the glue that holds us together, bro. You make us happy when we're down, you make sure that we all eat together, play together, sit together. Heck, you make sure we LIVE together as a family." The sniffling died down a little.

"I...I do?"

"Yes, you do, Mike." Don and Mike started at the new voice. Leonardo and Raphael entered, taking in the depressing sight before them. They'd wondered what was taking Donatello so long to give Michelangelo his pizza and, while standing outside his door, had heard the whole conversation. Guilt eating away at them, they sat next to their younger brothers, Leo by Don and Raph by Mike. Mikey buried his head in Don's shoulder, shame emanating from him.

"Hey, hey, c'mon now. Mikey, it's ok." He rubbed his immediate younger brother's head soothingly. Leo cleared his throat, trying to swallow the lump that suddenly formed in it, rubbing the youngster's arm.

"Mikey, we're really sorry about what we said. We didn't mean any of it."

"Yeah bro. Even if you are an annoying shell-brain, you're our brother. If anythin' happened to you…" Raph suppressed a shudder as memory surged forward. "When that sign fell on you...I don't mind admittin' that, well, I was scared bro." Mikey raised his head, cheeks damp from his tears and eyes redder than before.

"Y-you were?"

"Hell yeah, I thought you'd had it. It took the two of us to get that thing off of you. Can't tell you how relieved I was when you crawled out from under it."

"Yeah, and that was after you caught Shredder with your kusurigama chain and used the sign frame as leverage to pull him away. That was some quick thinking, Mike." Hope began to flicker in his light blue eyes.

"I-it was?"

"Yes, bro, it was. You see, you do more for this family than you know. We could never hate you, or not want to be with you. What was said then was nothing more than a moment of madness. We weren't thinking." Mikey wiped his eyes on the back of his arm, a smile beginning to creep onto his face.

"S-so, you guys don't hate me?" The others shared a glance, speaking in unison.

"Never."

"A-and you do want me around?"

"Of course we do."

"Sure thing bro."

"Why would we not, dude?"

Mikey's smile brightened, tear filled eyes beginning to shine again. Leo and Don pulled their youngest brother into a happily returned hug, Raph pulling him into a one armed hold when the hug finished and playfully rubbing the squirming, giggling turtle's head.

"So, who said something about pizza?" They laughed, standing to leave the room. Don picked up the plate with the now cold pizza and smiled at his younger brother before following Raph out of the room. Mikey grinned and hopped up off his bed, filled with a renewed energy and made to follow his two brothers. He turned to the oldest, his smile fading slightly. Leo's deep blue eyes still shone with guilt at what they'd done to the youngest of the family. How could they have hurt him in such a way?

"Leo?" The oldest refused to meet his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Mikey. I truly am. What we said...what I said...I'm a horrible older brother."

"Dude, it's ok." Leo looked up finally, deep blue guilty eyes meeting light blue ones.

"No, Mike. It's not ok. I'm supposed to be the leader. I'm supposed to watch out for everyone, not make one of my own feel so...so worthless. Can you ever forgive me?" Mikey smiled, enveloping his oldest brother in a tight, fond embrace.

"Bro, I forgave all of you the moment you said it. I couldn't stay mad at any of you." Leo smiled warmly and returned the hug.

"I love you bro."

"I love you too, Mike." Mikey's stomach suddenly growled loudly, breaking the moment.

"Heheh, sorry." Leo shook his head, throwing his arm over the youngster's shoulders and left the room.

"Come on, let's go and get that pizza. It's probably cold by now."

"Dude, cold pizza's, like, one of my favourite kinds of pizza!"

"Mikey, every pizza is your favourite kind of pizza."

"You better believe it, brother!" They joined their brothers around the table, chatting and bantering with each other as they dug into their meal, all negative thoughts and emotions forgotten. They were a family, brothers, and even if they fell out with each other from time to time, they would always be there for each other. With each other, and none of them would ever be left behind.

Man, it feels good to write again. Hope everyone enjoyed this!