Addicted To Pain
Disclaimer:
InuBunnygirl-I don't own Hellboy; Mike Mignola has that honor. I only own the idea and OCs. The song "Addicted" doesn't belong to me either; Kelly Clarkson does. But it-
Hellboy-You're stalling! *Turns to stage-whisper to readers* She doesn't want to write this story because i get hurt in it.
InuBunnygirl-Shut up! *Starts ranting on random things.*
Hellboy-*Sighs* I better take her to her bedroom for some stress relief. *Winks seductively at readers* Enjoy!
Liz and I have been a couple for a few months now. At first, our relationship was going great. Then Liz became abusive and started hitting me, making sure I couldn't eat, and degrading me. I keep up appearances, but I'm almost dead inside from Liz's abuse.
It's like you're a drug
It's like you're a demon I can't face down
It's like I'm stuck
It's like I'm running from you all the time
"Red, what are you eating?" I hear Liz ask calmly.
In an attempt to save myself from her wrath, I desperately hide the Baby Ruth candy bar behind my back and mutter "Nothing". Liz had already seen it though. She punched and kicked me in the stomach. I gasped in pain. More punches and kicks rained down until I was vomiting.
"This is what you deserve. You can never ever fit in. No one loves you. The Professor didn't even love you." Liz said with narrowed eyes.
And I know I let you have all the power
It's like the only company I seek is misery all around
It's like you're a leech
Sucking the life from me
It's like I can't breathe
Without you inside of me
And I know I let you have all the power
The next day, Liz checked herself into the same mental hospital she always does. For the moment, I'm relieved for that. I hear John come in. I'm too scared to eat, however.
"Hey, Red! I've got your favorites." John says.
"Not hungry. Not really anymore." I tell him.
"Why not, Red? What's the matter?" He asked.
"I'm just not really hungry much anymore. I guess I'm feeling my age." I tell him so he'll drop it.
"That's baloney, and you know it! Wait...is that a bruise on your cheek? How did you get that?" John exclaimed. I was afraid he was piecing things together.
"Oh, this?" I state, my fingers brushing the bruise lightly.
And I realize I'm never gonna quit you over time
It's like I can't breathe
It's like I can't see anything
Nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
Without you interrupting me
In my thoughts
In my dreams
You've taken over me
It's like I'm not me
"Yes, that." John is getting annoyed now.
"I...uh...tripped and fell on my filer." I replied quickly.
"Oh. Well, a new agent is coming tomorrow. She's going to be a 'Special Agent'." John replied, exited.
"What circumstances?" I asked, bored.
"Considered a danger to society. She really isn't, she's just...misunderstood." John explained.
I grew sad at that. Basically, she was like me. I could understand that. I knew what it felt like to be considered a danger when you want to protect. It didn't feel good.
It's like I'm not me
It's like I'm lost
It's like I'm giving up slowly
It's like you're a ghost that's haunting me
Leave me alone
And I know these voices in my head
Are mine alone
And I know I'll never change my ways
If I don't give you up now
It's like I can't breathe
I am anticipatig the new girl's arrival. I told John I wanted to meet her in my room, a safe environment. I hear my vault door open and I get into place easily. I see John pick up one of the 'Hellboy' comic books i have lying around.
"I hate those comic books. They never do get the eyes right." I say with a smile.
"I see what you mean. What's the weight?" The girl, I guess she's around twenty, nodded to the large weight in my left hand.
"100 pounds. Why?" I ask onfused. The bar feels like it's floating out of my loose grasp. I let go of it in shock. The girl is staring at the floating weight as if she is concentrating. I understand. "You're a Telekinetic!"
"I am. My name is Alexandria." She says while letting down the bar slowly.
It's like I can't see anything
Nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
Without you interrupting me
In my thoughts
In my dreams
You've taken over me
It's like I'm not me
It's like I'm not me
I'm hooked on you
I need a fix
I can't take it
Alexandria, or Nickey as sha prefers to be called, and i have been friends for three months now. I am developing feelings for her, but I'm scared of what Liz would do if she found out. I'm scared walking beside her. I was told at breakfast that Liz is returning today.
"It's a bit ironic, don't you think? A strong, cocky man like you can't stand up to an abusive girlfriend." Nickey says calmly.
"How could you tell? I don't even have bruises." I reply, terrified of what she thinks.
"For one, you close off when a woman yells at you. Second, you hesitate when eating, as if you're not sure you will be beaten if you do. Lastly, every time her name is said, you tense up. Why don't you take control?" Nickey explained.
"I can't. There's nothing I can do!" I say hopeless.
"Fine, let Liz keep beating you up!" Nickey snapped.
Just one more hit
I promise I can deal with it
I'll handle it, quit it
Just one more time
Then that's it
Just a little bit more to get me through this
I'm hooked on you
I need a fix
I can't take it
After a greeting beating, I was nursing new bruises. I thought of what Nickey had said. I finished cleaning my wounds and started walking to Nickey's room. I nervously knocked.
"Enter at your own pleasure." I hear from the other side of the door.
I go into her room to see her standing in the middle of the room levitating her bed and dresser. Her eyes are are closed in concentration. Nickey opens her eyes and sadly smiles at me in sympathy. She lowers her bed and dresser carefully and waves me to her bed in invitation.
"I thought about what you said." I told her.
"You don't deserve to be treated like that. How would you like for me to teach you how to get revenge against fellow 'good guys'? Get even." She proposed.
"I'd like that." I replied.
Just one more hit
I promise I can deal with it
I'll handle it, quit it
Just one more time
Then that's it
Just a little bit more to get me trhough this
It's like I can't breathe
It's like I can't see anything
Nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
Without you interrupting me
In my thoughts
"Red, please don't leave me for that girl! I'll do anything! Please don't leave me!" Liz screamed in terror at me.
I glared down at my ex girlfriend. It's been six months and I've finally got even with Liz and, as a bonus, I'm Nickey's boyfriend. This final step is needed to complete my revenge, and I walk out without looking back.
In my dreams
You've taken over me
It's like I'm not me