where hot bitch temari decides to visit konoha one day and finds herself hit on by every guy she sees...except for one.
Chouji
"Do you think we could…I don't know…Go out to eat…Or something…Sometime?"
"Perhaps when you lose some weight?"
Shino
"My bugs seem to like you, but I think I like you more."
"You're disgusting."
Naruto
"I'll buy you some Ichiraku ramen if you'll go out with me!"
"You'd eat my bowl anyway, dumb ass."
Kiba
"Hey there, sweet thang."
"I don't even like dogs, sweetheart."
Lee
"OH BEAUTIFUL BLONDE KUNOICHI, WOULD YOU LIKE TO CELEBRATE YOUR YOUTH WITH ME? IF NOT, I WILL DO FIVE THOUSAND ONE-HANDED PUSH UPS. IF I CANNOT DO THAT, I WILL SPRINT TWO THOUSAND LAPS AROUND KONOHA. IF I CANNOT DO THAT, I WILL-"
"Fuck off, Spandex."
Neji
"The view of your body while I was practicing my Eight Trigams Palms Revolving Heaven was amazing."
"Are you some in-the-closet pervert?"
Sasuke
"Come join the dark side…We have cookies."
"What are you and Orochimaru smoking?"
Shikamaru
"…"
"Are you gay?"
"Excuse me?"
"You haven't hit on me once."
"Flirting is too troublesome."
"But isn't the work worth it? I mean, look at me."
"…"
"Well?"
"Do you know how to play Shogi?"
"Yes, why?"
"Let's go to my place."
"Much better."
A/N: Hopefully this elicited a laugh or two out of you. I had a lot of fun writing this. I'd beg you to review, but that would mean I'd get my knees dirty... But I'll do it anyway. Though I'm not sure how to reply to reviews! Could someone help me with that in their response? Thank you for reading!