A/N this is my first Narnia fanfiction so any tips would be nice. This was english homework and my friend said I should upload it so TADA!
~LostArtOfRomance
As I sat skilfully on the teetering rock, I thought about all the times you've done me wrong and all the times I've thought to myself "this really is the last straw"
The war took dad away and you were only young. You begged and pleaded with him not to leave but he had to "Dulce et Decorum est, pro patria mori" he told you, at the time you didn't understand. You fought the battle with anger and bitterness, you made our sisters cry. I never saw the pain in your eyes; I couldn't how you were dead inside. I only saw the cried tears not the tears hidden behind a broken smile.
By now it's probably too late to say that I'm sorry for all the times I've let you down and sorry for all the dismay I've caused you. It hasn't been too long since you've told me how they beat and called you names, how you being miniscule could do nothing but join them. I'm sorry you did not help you when you couldn't help yourself.
I am sorry for being an intolerable ass as of recent times, I'm sorry for rejecting the help I never offered you. Thank you for standing by me when I was at war with myself. I'm sorry for not being there to hold you when she haunted your dreams, for all the times she's had you in her grasp and I haven't been able to save you. I'm sorry for not being able to say "It's going to be okay".
I'm sorry for scolding you for being "childish" when you yourself were a child, I'm sorry I wasn't there to stop her in Beruna, seeing your lifeless body was enough to make me realise my mistakes. I thought I had lost you, the one thing that meant the most to me. My baby brother's life was no longer in my hands but in the clutches of the White Witch and there was nothing I could do about it.
Ed, I do not blame you for leaving like you did, I know you found comfort in her deceiving eyes, she promised you a kingdom and most of all she promised you love, love I never gave you. I was the brother who could only doubt and scold you for only seeking reassurance, you needed it just as much as Lucy, Susan or I. Now, I am only glad to still have you home.
I am sorry you can no longer look me in the eye for fear of rejection, I am sorry that I made you feel not good enough. Edmund, you are my king as much as Narnia's. I can never truly speak how sorry I am for not being what I should and not giving you the help you needed. I may not be able to put to words how sorry I am but I can honestly tell you how much I love respect and need you.
"Dulce et Decorum est, pro patria mori" you know the meaning now.