Hello! Thankyou for taking the time to look at this story! I know this sort of story has probably been done a million times before, but I felt the urge to write it. This is my first fanfic, so I hope it's okay :P
Dear Zero
Yuuki couldn't sleep.
She was curled up in bed in the house she and Kaname had lived in for the month since they left Cross Academy. The wind was howling outside, and even though there were no windows in Yuuki's room she could imagine the rain splattering on the ground. Her sheets were a tangled mess from her constant tossing and turning. Ever since the day they left, Yuuki had been unable to have a good night's sleep.
.
She missed a lot of people from those days. Her adopted father, Kaien, for example. Even though she now knew she was Yuuki Kuran, the daughter of Haruka and Juuri Kuran, he had raised her for ten years, and she would always fondly remember her days as "Yuuki Cross", his adopted daughter. She even missed his horrible cooking! She missed her best friend, Yori, whom she had spent many happy hours with in their shared dorm room and at classes. But most of all, she missed…
Zero. She missed him a lot more than she thought she should. She was living with Kaname now, who she had secretly loved for so long. But even though the man she had admired was hers now, she couldn't help but long to see Zero again, to talk to him, to laugh with him. Yuuki sighed, rolling over for the umpteenth time.
.
"Stop it Yuuki," she whispered, holding her head in her hands. "Stop it! You said you'd run away from him forever, remember? You're a pureblood, the thing he hates. So stop it!"
She repeated this mantra in her head multiple times. But she still couldn't sleep.
"Maybe a walk will help me calm down," Yuuki thought. With this idea in mind, she sat up, and tiptoed out of bed. She headed out the door, enjoying the feeling of the cool floor underneath her feet. She was careful to creep very silently as she passed Kaname's room. She didn't want him to worry about her. The corridor was dark and deserted, with the occasional candle casting a dim glow. Soon, Yuuki reached the study where Aidou tried (and failed) to tutor her. She went inside, hoping to maybe find an interesting book to read until she fell asleep. She sat down at her desk, and rootled through the desk drawers. Although she did not find a book to read, she found some blank sheets of writing paper that she was supposed to do her homework on. The papers had many lines, and a small flower motif at the top of the paper. The urge was too strong, and she picked up a pen and began to write.
.
Dear Zero,
How are you? I hope the Chairman isn't driving you crazy! What about this weather, huh? Although I haven't been outside, I notice the smell of snow has gone. I guess spring is finally here, yay! It's my favourite season, the flowers are always so beautiful. Today I had another lesson with Aidou. I think he is getting very annoyed with me! I was always hopeless at schoolwork, the only times I ever did okay was when you tutored me. I'm sorry you had to waste your time doing that, you probably had much better things to do. Anyway, I -
.
Yuuki paused. She knew she shouldn't be doing this. She should be happy here, with Kaname, the man of her dreams. But even as she thought this her hand kept moving as if it had a mind of its own.
.
I miss you so much. I really wish I could see you. I know that's horribly selfish of me, and you never want to see me again. I know we are enemies, and that I promised I will keep running from you forever. Don't worry, I will, but I can't help but wish you were here. I want us to talk like we used to, and laugh together. I'm so lonely, even with Kaname onii-sama here. I drink his blood every day, but I always want more. If you saw me now, you'd probably hate me even more, if that's possible. The girl you knew has been completely taken over by this terrible vampire instinct. I drink so much blood, but I always want more. Sometimes, I even think about drinking your blood Zero. I know I should never think that, and it's horrible of me to even suggest it.
.
In some ways, I wish we'd never parted. Even if that meant not being able to live with Kaname forever. Gaining him does not equal losing you. Sometimes I wish we'd met under different circumstances, like if we'd both been born human, and stayed human. How would our lives had gone then? I'm sure whatever happened would have been better than what's happening now. But I must never let anyone know this. Especially Kaname. He's done so much for me, and I don't want to hurt him. I've already hurt you, Zero, so much. In my selfish heart, I hope one day you will forgive me. But I know that won't happen, so don't worry. I don't deserve it. Anyway, I'm sorry for rambling so much! I hope you're well. Tell Yori and the Chairman I said hello.
.
Yuuki paused once more.
"Love, Yuuki" she signed.
For a few minutes, she just sat at her desk in the dim candlelight, staring at the piece of paper she had written on.
"Yuuki?"
She jumped, quickly crumpling the paper in her hand. She turned towards the voice, and saw Kaname standing in the doorway.
"Why are you up at this hour?" he asked, his red eyes filled with concern
"I'm sorry!" Yuuki apologized, flustered. "I – I just thought I needed to do some extra study, that's all. Aidou was going to give me a quiz tomorrow, and I'm nowhere near ready."
Kaname raised an eyebrow, obviously unconvinced. However, he did not comment.
"Well, you should go back to bed now Yuuki, or you'll be so tired you'll fall asleep during your test."
"Yes, onii-sama, I'm coming," Yuuki said quickly, blowing out the candle on her desk. She hurriedly got up and rushed out the door, the piece of paper still crumpled in her hand. She climbed back into her bed, pulling the sheets over her head. Yuuki remained in this position for some time, still clutching the paper. After about half an hour, she got out of bed once more. Reaching under her bed, she pulled out an old shoebox she had thrown under there a few weeks ago. Carefully she smoothed out the paper and placed it in the box, before closing the lid and placing it once more underneath. She returned to her bed, and for the first time since she had left the academy, slept soundly until morning.
Yuuki could tell it was snowing outside. Even though she was still not allowed to leave the house, the unmistakable smell of snow was in the air.
A year had passed since she and Kaname had left the academy. Yuuki was in her study, waiting that day's lesson her lesson with Aidou. She added a few more lines to the piece of paper she was writing on.
.
It's snowing again, huh? I remember the first time I wrote a letter to you, the snow had just disappeared. Has it really been only a year since we parted? It feels like so much longer.
.
"Cross! Have you done your homework?" Aidou came storming into the room.
Yuuki jumped violently, stuffing the paper into her desk drawer.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"I'm writing a letter to Yori!" Yuuki cried, standing in front of the drawer protectively.
"Another one? How many letters does she need?" he said, looking at her curiously.
"Well, I haven't seen her for a year, so," she muttered desperately.
He raised an eyebrow, but did not press the issue.
"Anyway, let's start the lesson."
"Yes, let's," Yuuki breathed a sigh of relief, clutching the handle of the drawer behind her back.
.
After their lesson had finished and Aidou had left, Yuuki reopened the desk drawer and retrieved the piece of paper. Picking up a pen, she completed it.
"Love, Yuuki." She signed. Making sure the coast was clear, she ran back to her room and pulled out the old shoebox. Taking off the lid, she added this newest letter to the pile of papers that were threatening to overflow.
Thanks again for reading this! I was sort of inspired by the latest chapter and how Yuuki was implied to be writing letter to Zero while she was in the Kuran mansion :)
