Authors Notes:
Something that kind of popped in to my head, thought I'd write it down and basically see where I can take it. Thus the writers block is gone.
I may or may not extend this, but that'll be determined later, depending on what you guys think and want to see.
Warnings: Fem!Naru (Not YaoI)
The irritating noise of fidgeting thighs on a leather seat filled the awkward silence. To Kakashi however, the silence couldn't have been more appreciated. After all, listening to a bickering couple for a lengthy hour was bound to drive any sane man to cut off his ears. But there was silence – finally. Whether or not it was a scary sound, he would soon find out.
A pair of glazed over eyes peered over a tattered notebook, a fresh page stained with a messy, slanted, nearly illegible script. He pushed his half-moon specs to the bridge of his nose and then ran a firm thumb up and down his forehead. He could feel a migraine about to strike like a viper at any moment.
"So," He spoke, clearing his scratchy throat for the tenth time that morning. "After painful observation it seems to me like the pair of you are in a constant battle for dominance. Now, correct me If I'm wrong but this appears to be some child-like fued...who can run the fastest, eat the fastest, get the best grades. Does any of this resonate with you?"
A petite blond woman huffed in her seat and crossed her arms in defiance. Her overall appearance seemed that of a mature young woman – well kept, well dressed, ankles crossed neatly, perfect posture. One could easily be mistaken, but they would be made quite the fool. She was loud, obnoxious, overly confident, incredibly argumentative, and would not take no for an answer.
"I can't possibly see how this has anything to do with me, it sounds like the bio of the king arrogance over there." The blonds voice was breathy as she jerked her head towards her pissed off husband sitting parallel to her.
"Oh please, that's the biggest load of shit I've ever heard," The young male retorted in annoyance, pushing an inky strand out of his line of vision. "From day one you've always tried to one up me, Naruto. You can't say that it isn't true. Besides...you couldn't do it then and you can't do it now." He smirked, feeling a little triumphant.
"I completely disagree!"
"Of course you do, dead last." He had all intention to be spiteful – to hurt her. After three months of the anti-honeymoon period, he had already reached his limit. Neither of them imagined married life would be so...difficult.
"I...completely... disagree!" Naruto repeated, her tone more threatening than before.
Kakashi released a frustrated gurgle and threw his head back on the neckrest of his chair. He begged for the sweet relief of death, to be struck down there and then, to be free of this session. He shut his eyes and squeezed them tight almost expecting something to happen, he then snapped them open kind of relieved that he was still breathing. He sucked in a tonne of air and tried to center himself on the exhale.
"Sasuke, you shouldn't call your wife such things. Naruto, you can't literally disagree with everyone and everything all the time, can you?" He sure as hell hoped not.
"I don't disagree with everyone and everything, just him." Naruto rolled her eyes at her husbands scoff.
"In my professional opinion, it appears as though you disagree with Sasuke," Kakashi corrected. "Because you want an excuse to arg-"
"I completely disagree!"
The frustrated counselor bit his lip and hung his head in defeat. He wasn't sure how much more of this back and forth he could take. His own frustration was matched with the likes of Sasuke's who was chewing viscously on his fingernails, a loud pop echoing with every bite.
Narutos fine eyebrow twitched uncontrollably, the sound was like some sick kind of punishment for her ears.
"Stop." She said through grit teeth, her molars grinding against another.
"Stop what?" Her husbands devilishly handsome face contorted in to that of a smirking buffoon. He loved to piss her off.
"Stop chewing your god damn nails you freakin' bastard!"
Sasukes smirk widened when he decided to ignore her. He turned gracefully on his chair and folded his arms across his chest, staring Kakashi dead in the eye like this petty argument was the epitome of all seriousness.
"Do you see what she does to me?" His words were laced with a faux sadness. "Telling me how to live my life, trying to change me – like I'm not even good enough. Do you see?"
Kakashi stared with tired eyes as he reached for his mug. It was no surprise that it wasn't a cup of coffee, rather a gnarly cocktail of Sake and orange juice. The tangy orange flavor zapped his tongue like a cattle prod and the warmth of the Sake coated his belly like a knitted blanket. Oh how he cherished moments like these.
"Hmm, I see," He tutted, trying to pick the pulp out of his teeth. "But I'm pretty sure I no longer care."