WHAT? IT'S NOT A CROSSOVER?

…no, it isn't. XD This is actually a more normal kingdom hearts story. I was thinking of novelizing KH2, but this'll do for now. Also note that this fanfic doesn't entirely follow game's mechanics.

Summary: After reflecting on the ordeal with the heartless and Organization XIII, Sora's heart gives rise to more than just self-doubt. Can he conquer his most powerful nemesis of all, or is the Realm of Light doomed?

Setting: Before final battle, so this will be somewhat AU.

Seeking Redemption

By FlikFreak

Chapter One: Contemplation

Sora stared at the ground with his eyes narrowed to slits. Not in anger, not in hate, not in disgust, not in frustration, but in contemplation. Hollow Bastion was much safer now that he and the others had defeated an absurdly large number of heartless, and many of the worlds were far safer now that the heartless and nobody population had decreased, but that would have never happened if Ansem had never experimented with the darkness in people's hearts. Now that Sora thought about it, many things were prompted by small actions, even this whole journey he had been sent on.

When Kairi had appeared on the islands, Riku had grown curious about "other worlds." Being the naïve children they were, they made to build a raft to sail and see other places. Of course, now Sora knew that the most distance that would get them would be the middle of the sea. They talked about it for a long time, and even gathered provisions to head out, and when the time finally came to go, they left…but not in the way they probably should have. That day echoed clearly in his mind.

He had learned the meaning of the phrase "Be careful what you wish for."

"Riku!"

But the boy did not answer. He simply held out his hand as the darkness writhed across his body, binding him to the spot. Without thinking, Sora ran forward, only to find himself trapped as well. Concern for Riku quickly outweighed panic, and he reached forward, even as the darkness threatened to envelope him. Riku stood still, not making any effort to help him forth. Within moments, the darkness overwhelmed Sora, weaving its way into his nostrils and mouth, replacing what should have been oxygen in his lungs. It bound his nerves, slowly paralyzing him. Unable to move or breathe properly, Sora staggered backward as he began to suffocate.

Then it happened. Within him came a warm, comforting feeling that at the same time was terrifyingly powerful. It spread from his heart down his limbs to his fingertips, the tips of his ears and even his eyes. The darkness seemed to cry out in fear and shrink away as a light burst from all around him.

Sora found his way onto his feet again and gasped for breath, now able to breathe and feel. As he looked about, he found the island still in the midst of destruction. The darkness beneath had vanished, along with Riku. In Sora's hands, in place of his wooden toy, was a large, metal sword, the hilt wrapping around his hands and the end spiked off in what strongly reminded him of…

A key…? He thought. Or is it a sword?

Whatever it was, he knew that power was coming from this weapon…whatever it was. For a moment, he stood entirely in awe of it, like time had stood still just so he could marvel at whatever had just occurred. But then he looked up and saw those creatures appearing again, this time more of them than before. Panicking, he tore past them into a small cave near the waterfall of the island, in hopes of finding shelter. Maybe whatever was past that door would be a great place to hide.

But once he got there, he found that it was even more dangerous than outside. Kairi stood at the end waiting for him, calling out to him in a monotone voice that did not belong to someone so cheerful as her. The door behind her flew open and a dark mist blew out like a hurricane wind. Kairi flew toward Sora, whom attempted to catch her…when nothing happened. The wind picked up and he was hurled outside the secret place, onto a small spit of land that was all that remained of his home…

That day had been the start of Sora's adventures across numerous worlds in search of his friends, but even when he did find them, he had to keep fighting. If he didn't, people would get hurt, killed, or worse.

Then there was Organization XIII.

Yen Sid had informed him (using Donald's dinner as a module, to the duck's dismay) that Nobodies were beings without hearts, and thus could not feel emotions. They simply pretended to have hearts to make up for it. Organization XIII was a group of powerful Nobodies that were seeking to regain their hearts and become whole once more. At least, that's what he had heard from one of them. Whether they did or not, however, Sora wasn't too keen on their methods.

Sora knew he had to keep fighting as long as the keyblade was with him, but that would mean helping the Organization. The boy wasn't too keen on the idea of being used, and had always had little patience for people that manipulated him; then again, Riku had always admonished him for being quick to anger when he was confused. Even so, he found himself surprised by several members' dispositions. For one, Axel had not only warned him about what the Organization was after, but he also admitted to kidnapping Kairi and began to apologize for it before Saïx arrived and drove him off. The thought of someone in the Organization being a traitor was interesting to him.

Demyx especially came to mind. While the Nobody had been somewhat of an oddball in nature to Sora (he apparently didn't mind reading cue cards or complaining about fighting in front of him, so the keyblade master didn't take him very seriously), he was utterly shocked when the Sitar-wielding individual completely changed face before him, calling him a traitor and taking on a dangerously angry tone of voice. Sora barely had time to regain composure before he was hit with an onslaught of water jets, and by the time the fight was over he barely had it in him to take on the waves of heartless that awaited.

But there were still members he despised, no matter whether they were nobodies or normal. The one that had appeared after Axel fled did nothing but mock him, and the one he ran into on his first visit to Hollow Bastion after waking up made him seethe in anger for some reason that he couldn't ascertain. Xaldin had attempted to get Beast to submit to the darkness in his heart so that he would become a heartless for Sora to slay, and a Nobody for the Organization to recruit and control. He had vague memories about a female that taunted him, but every time he tried to dig them up they went away, and he thought nothing more of it.

In spite of all of that, one thing remained the same: they were all using him to do their dirty work.

As the sun set on Radiant Garden, Sora made his way for the canyon where the masses of heartless had gathered that day. He had been comforted numerous times by his friends, reminding him they were there if they needed him, but the very idea of being used made him feel worthless. With every swing of the keyblade, he only found more pain, and the Organization drew closer to their goal. He'd never stop them at this rate.

As the doubt rose in his heart, he found the world around him beginning to blur, and he only focused forward. Before long, he found himself passing the place where he had fought Demyx, past the small pathway and into the Crystal Fissure. The fissure was beautiful and peaceful, even though he had clear memories of passing through in a hurry when the heartless had threatened to take over. Sighing, he sat down and laid flat on the ground, staring upward past the various shards of glittering gemstones and to the sky past the canyon walls. The way the sun caught on some of the shards higher up reminded him of the little blue bead that had fallen off of the trophy Seifer had given him. It was quite beautiful, and it always calmed him when he was worried.

But somehow, the doubt would not leave.

A familiar warmth curled in Sora's heart, and he sat up to notice that the keyblade had summoned itself in his hand. Sora narrowed his eyes and stared at it. "This is all your fault," he muttered. "If it weren't for you…"

No response came. Sora knew the weapon was sentient, but he never expected a real response. Sighing, he stood up and held it in both hands. "What do you want me to do? If I keep destroying heartless, that's only helping them."

The warmth came again, attempting to reassure him. It did little, and Sora shook his head. "People have been hurt because of me. I don't want that happening anymore. Everyone's counting on me, but I can't let them down…what am I supposed to do?"

Then he remembered Hercules. The man was a hero, no question, but when he had lost confidence, he simply couldn't fight like he used to. Sora knew how that was. Then, when Hercules rescued Megara, he had regained his strength, and they quite literally defeated Hades at his own game. But who did Sora have to protect? They were all either safe at home or out of his reach. How could he help anyone?

Sighing, Sora stood and attempted to dismiss the keyblade, but it didn't leave this time. He stared at his hand, noting its presence, and placed it against the wall and backed away. It went back to his hand in a flash of light and burst of ethereal wind. Angered, Sora glared at the weapon and threw it as far away as he could, into the depths where the heartless had gathered before. But, once again, it came back to him. He glared at it, and would have crossed his arms had he not been holding it. "What's your deal?" he asked. "What are you trying to tell me?"

Once again, he felt the warmth, this time stronger, and he sighed, exiting the fissure into the Great Maw. It was strange to be there again; the last time he had come here was when the entire canyon was literally buried in the enemy heartless. Sora kept walking through, knowing that in the cliff beyond he could catch a view of the old castle that he once went through to save Kairi and seal the keyhole.

Before he could reach it, however, a familiar whirring caught his ears and he spun around to see several knight-type heartless waiting for him. Sora winced for the first time since he saw a heartless in his dreams two years ago. He knew what fighting them meant for him and the Organization. What choice do I have? He thought. I have to fight…or people will be hurt…

As the beasts ran for him, Sora backed away a few feet, searching within him for power. The clothes he had received from the fairies in Yen Sid's tower had told him about the power they held, but they warned him about using it too much. Nonetheless, he pulled it out, feeling himself jerk back as the magic took effect, and the light shone from all around him.

But something went wrong.

Sora's mind was racing. His vision went black, that disgusting taste seeping into his mouth and choking him. He screamed in fear, only for it to emerge as a feral howl. Then, one by one, he began to lose control of his senses until something else took over his mind.

Kill…Kill!

He couldn't disagree. He lunged forward at the heartless, tearing them apart within a matter of moments with claws and fangs, his mind entirely feral. Was this what he had been warned about? But how…how could this happen?

With the heartless vanquished, Sora found himself racing back to where he came from. Light…destroy…kill…destroy the light…

Sora tore past the heartless that appeared around him, ripping them to shreds and hurling them aside as he neared the town. When he did, he sniffed the air. He hadn't had a sense of smell this good since he was last in his lion form in the Pride Lands. But he didn't smell things…he smelled light and darkness. An irresistible urge to vanquish that painful light rose and he raced into town, killing all heartless in his path. Once near Merlin's, he found Leon standing outside. He spun when he heard Sora approaching and his eyes widened in shock. Sora didn't care. He had to kill that light…that painful, despicable light…

Leon shouted something that he couldn't discern and shot a fireball at Sora. It slammed him square in the chest and sent him flying backward, crashing into a wall. He shook it off and ran forward again, this time to be parried by the man's blade. He shouted at him, but Sora could only hiss back.

Light…destroy…

No, Sora! Don't!

Destroy!

Sora, get a hold of yourself!

"Get off, heartless!"

At that moment, the writing darkness seemed to stop for a moment, and Sora hesitated. He knew that voice. Screaming in frustration, the force holding him captive in his own mind ebbed and fled, causing Sora to collapse to the ground. Somewhere, deep in his heart, he felt the darkness still plaguing him, but it was pushed away by the familiar light of the keyblade as it appeared. Sora gasped for breath, barely noticing as he heard footsteps racing for him and voices calling out. The last thing he saw before he passed out was a familiar face ridden with concern.

Well, short-ish first chapter. Meh, it's the start of an idea.