Welcome, one and all! A huge THANK YOU to all my reviewers, and to those who didn't… *coughs and glares* Yes, I apologise for the seriously long wait for this fic, I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY! There was school and there was manga and… and… OK I've run out of excuses, plus I have a feeling you don't really wanna listen to me ramble endlessly on and on. So… READ ON, YOU IDIOTS!
What is the biggest problem facing humanity at this point in time? Two words – GLOBAL WARMING. Others, however, may disagree, claiming that it is war/annoying boyfriends/too few yaoi mangas/Shizuo Heiwajima being a fictional character (gotta agree with that last one… *drools*). However, I, the AMAZINGLY AWESOME MARSHMALLOW, HAVE THE ANSWER TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS!
Right now, in Phase One, what we need to do is spread the word. Everyone, create BL! Show your friends how awesome yaoi can be! Let the m/m movement take over the world! Yes… *evil laughter*
Now, when these obsessed fangirls grow up, what will they do? That's right – they will get a job, as shown in Phase Two. Some will become CEOs of huge companies, others will become scientists, and yet more will become researchers… With all these powerful, BL-obssessed people, what will happen? Yep – we move to Phase Three.
Phase Three is where the good stuff happens. The researchers will, being the yaoi manga otakus that they are, find some way to create clones. The scientist-fangirls will then, in secret, create clones of Remus and Sirius, with the CEOs and managers and presidents and movie stars and - well, you get the point- supply the cash. And once that happens…
Remus and Sirius are, of course, MADE for each other. It's obvious. So, as soon as they meet, what occurs is – PASSIONATE BOY LOVE! The heat from their hot gay men smex can then be used to power factories/power stations/ etc. (I'm sure they wouldn't mind… after all, making out in a nuclear reactor will probably make them happy, the kinky idiots.) This would, untimately, solve ALL THE WORLD"S PROBLEMS! As shown below…
Global warming? When electricity and power is supplied by… uh… "natural alternatives" (READ: GAY SEX), this will become non-existent, since the Earth will gradually cool down once human activities slow down.
War? When everyone is glued to their TV screens watching Remmie and Siri make out and/or have hot BDSM sex, who has time for that?
Pissed at your boyfriend? There are two possibilities: Either he sees RLSB and his eyeballs are ruined forever, or he gets jealous that you pay more attention to a gay couple halfway around the world than him and walks out on you, giving you EVEN MORE TIME to drool over those two hot guys. Yeah…
Shizuo and other hot fictional characters? Hey, you created Moony and Padfoot, why not others now? Remember, BL makes the world go round…
And that, my dearies who stuck around long enough to get to the end of this horribly rambling story, is how RLSB saved the world.
The End
… or not.
OK, everyone! I know this story was terrible, but I tried my best, really. *cringes while rotten tomatoes get thrown at me*
I am probably going to take a hiatus for a while, because my schedule is gonna be pretty hectic. So… maybe try PMing me fifty years later? (hehe juz kidding…) But I will be away pretty long, so don't expect me to come up with anything for a while. I am thinking of doing a "Slashfest" series of oneshots, though, with parings from various fandoms and a main pairing – all gay, of course, apart from some side ones. So, which should be my main paring? Please vote for:
Remus/Sirius? (Harry Potter)
Harry/Draco? (Harry Potter)
Ford/Arthur? (Hitchhiker's Guide)
Shizuo/Izaya (Durarara!) Note: I may also choose to do their alters, like Tsugaru/Psyche, etc.
Vote, please, but don't expect anything concrete to appear soon. Thanks everybody, thanks! (Kudos to anyone who recognises this quote.)