A/N: Cross posted to AO3
Bela remembered her human life in a blurry sort of way. It was the one thing she held onto when things in hell became too much. After the first 75 years she stopped screaming. She would lose herself in whatever memories she had left. Feeling the cool wind blow through her hair as she sped down the highway. Or the subtle burn down her throat that usually accompanied her favourite scotch. The memory of touches where pain wasn't the intention. It took her a while to realize that it was a mistake. Demons hated it when you didn't appreciate their efforts. They tried harder.
It was Alistair who succeeded in the end. It seemed that many different demons got to try their hand at making you hurt. But Bela had always been stubborn. So they called in for special services. For what was a century he tore into her. Making her suffer. Laughing at her screams. Promising her salvation if she were to pick up a blade. And it wasn't always physical. Things broke into her mind. She saw things that left her screaming for days on end until her voice was hoarse. By this point she knew nothing but pain. It was her life. It was the only thing she understood. She had to spend a while thinking before she could ever remember her name. And then it stopped being a game to Alistair. He wanted to make her break. And so she did.
The first time she held that knife in her hand it was an old man who, like her, made a deal. He begged and pleaded for her to stop. He was sorry. He wishes he didn't make the deal. His daughter was dying and this was the only way. Have some mercy. Please. She had none left to give. There was no sympathy as she tore into his flesh. She kept going at it for what felt like centuries. It was probably only a good year. She peeled his skin off relentlessly, his screams only egged her on and by the time she was done he was reminiscent of spoilt hamburger meat. And with a snap his body was whole again and someone else wanted to give him a go. She was okay with someone else taking over. She wasn't territorial like most demons. She had body after body pass through her rack. Always the same pleas, to no avail. It was fun. Hearing those bitches scream louder than she ever did. They were weak.
She had her fun with them and then she was bored.
She had a new goal.
She wanted to get out of hell.
A way out of hell. Yeah not as easy as she thought it would be. First of all you literally had to climb your way out. And then there was dealing with all the tarnished souls trying to pull you back down. The wall she was climbing was covered with jagged pieces of rock, steam shooting through vents in the wall and burning her. Decomposing flesh and bones falling on her face. The stink making her gag. She almost fell several times. She climbed until she felt like passing out. She needed to stop for rest so she hid away in a tiny cave as she considered her options. She knew enough about being a demon to know that she was basically unrecognisable to anyone who had known her before. She had horns and two tails and when she felt her face it felt so disfigured she often wondered how she looked. There were no mirrors in hell, and judging from the other demons' appearances, she was glad about that. She'd need a host body.
She was about to start her journey when she felt a hand grab her and pull her back into the cave.
"What do you want?" She whirled around to see a female demon smirking at her
"I'm Meg. Nice to meet you too." The demon appraised her, not speaking for a few moments. "I caught your show downstairs a few years back. You're a little sloppy but I suppose you have potential."
"It's sweet that you think your opinion matters." Bela snapped. "But I have places to go, people to kill."
"Not really." Meg drawled looking bored. "If you leave here now, a higher level will catch you and drag you back down for some reconditioning."
"What are you talking about?" Bela asked, actually interested for the first time since Meg started talking.
"I can smell it on you." Meg looked her up and down. "You haven't even been here a millennia have you? You're still a low level little baby. You're just an imprwessionable widdle child. We can't have you being influenced by all those pure souls up there."
"So every time I leave I'm going to have to come back down here if someone exorcises me?"
"'Fraid so."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I have something I need to do upstairs, and I can't have you fucking up my chances of getting out of here can I?"
"What do you have to do?"
"None of your business." Meg sneered. Bela rolled her eyes at Meg's obvious distrust of her. The feeling's mutual honey.
Bela slid to the floor and started tapping her nails against a piece of rock. They sat there for hours waiting. It was a good sign in Bela's opinion. She literally felt time slowing. The time they sat there would have roughly been 6 months lower down and it only felt like 2 days.
"I have a bone to pick with a certain Winchester." Meg grumbled eventually when the silence seemed to start to irritate her.
"Winchester." Bela paused. That name was so familiar. She could taste it on her tongue. The memory is vague but it doesn't feel like a name she wants to remember.
And then after a few moments, there it was. "Sam and Dean." she said flatly.
"Friends of yours?" Meg asked with a brittle smile.
"No." Bela replied simply. "How do we get out of here then?"
Meg watched her and pursed her lips. "If you get in my way and try to save those two meat heads I will make hell look like a joke. I will end you."
"I have no interest in helping those two." Bela responded, her eyes flashing with ire. "But threaten me again and it will be the last thing you ever do."
Meg glared at her for a moment before smirking and holding out her hand. "I like you." Bela watched it warily before grabbing on.
Meg used the skills she'd gotten from other treks to the surface world. She scaled edges of the earth with ease. Using the jagged edges of stone to lift herself higher. Bela followed her lead. She was not quite as stealthy as Meg but she held her own.
"How long have we been doing this?" Bela panted, exhaustion creeping in.
"Time's slowing young padawan." Meg said as she hoisted herself over a particularly large piece of stone. "We're almost here."
When Bela finally caught up with Meg she was standing near on a flat surface of earth and the sky above her burned red hot.
"Where. The fuck. Are we?" Bela asked as she struggled to catch her breath.
"We need to pass through that." Meg said pointing to the sky. "The sky is an illusion, but the fire is very real."
"So how do we get through?" Bela asked.
"We become incorporeal." As Meg talked she began to shift. Her body shimmered until she basically looked like black smoke. "It's simple, you just have to focus. Imagine that you're everywhere, but nowhere all at one. Think yourself invisible."
Bela tried to focus her energy into following Meg's instructions, but it was harder than it looked. She looked down and her body was shimmering but it wasn't moving from that stage.
"Focus." Meg snapped. "We can't stay here forever."
Bela wanted to snap right back at her, but she cooled her temper and tried to take Meg's advice. She closed her eyes and focused. She could feel Meg's distant pleasure and she opened her eyes. She did it. She couldn't help how smug she felt as she asked "What now."
"Follow my lead." Meg said as she floated towards the 'sky'. And she saw her become one with the fire and then disappear.
Bela followed her example; but nothing prepared her for the pain that would accompany rising through the fires. Everything surrounding her burned white hot. If her body was properly formed she would be writhing around in pain. But as it was she could only scream bloody murder. She'd suffered through a lot but nothing compared to this. The fires invaded her mind and she was powerless as she floated higher and higher, accompanied by what could only be the stench of burning flesh, which was strange as she was incorporeal. She burned for what felt like hours before she could feel fresh air on her skin; and her breathing began to ease.