No matter how far back she thinks, Prudence cannot remember the moment she started to like girls. She remembers as a child gender and sex were things she was only vaguely aware of, concepts of no consequence to her. When puberty came with its vicious onslaught of hormones and change, gender still didn't matter; however, she began to get the vague notion that when it came to sex, she preferred soft curves and lips.
Suddenly, girls were the unobtainable ones; while the other cheerleaders were giggling over the football players, she was dreaming over green skirts and blonde hair. Perhaps Anna, cheerleading captain, had been her first crush - all because Anna had been so kind to solitary outsider Prudence, taking her under her wing, getting her on the cheerleading squad.
Needless to say, though, Anna did not reciprocate. Later that day, Prudence's parents had caught her in her room singing about holding girls' hands and being their man. They did not approve, so Prudence had packed her bags, left a letter on the top of the stairs, and hitchhiked to New York, center of the universe.
Bill had been a mistake; someone she slept with just for a place to stay. Something good had come of the mess, though, the sudden slam to the face when she had revealed her motivation behind sleeping with him; she'd crawled across through Sadie's bathroom window, into a world of acceptance and kindness.
Jude had been amazing, with his kind jokes and pictures. Max had been wonderful, with his gentle teasing and lopsided grins. It was the first time she had slept with guys for a reason besides saving her reputation or procuring lodging; she had liked them, if not necessarily for romantic reasons. They had become like older brothers to her, if not kindred spirits - there was only one bed in their room, after all, and the walls were paper thin.
Jojo was sweet, letting her sit by his feet while he played guitar and hummed a tune. Once he had let her sing along with his guitar; it had been a simple ditty, a love ballad laced with French, but he had smiled like her father had when she was little and the world didn't need to make sense. She'd gone to bed confused, her dreams strange and awkward and laced with sexy Sadie.
Sadie - she was beautiful, beautiful and wild and completely off limits. Prudence loved Jojo too much to try anything, but she couldn't help but yearn; Sadie was so kind, allowing Prudence to stay while she found a job while she demanded two weeks of money from everyone else. Prudence couldn't help but fall, and fall hard; Sadie's hugs were warm, her kisses to the forehead soft, her gyrating hips and rough voice Aphrodite incarnate. For a moment, Prudence had wondered if she had been a little in love.
Lucy had noticed, with her blue eyes and blonde hair; Lucy, the girl who Prudence had been content to be friends with. Maybe it was because she was Jude's, although she couldn't help but wonder what Max felt about that. He'd told her eventually, stinging from memories of the two in bed as he slept on the couch; he'd known, but he hadn't really wanted it to go anywhere, but what could he do? He was going to Vietnam, his sister was Jude's type, and Jude deserved to be happy. Prudence had kissed him, trying to comfort him; one thing had led to another, and she spent the night in the closet.
Later Prudence would laugh at the irony. She had come out of the closet, proverbially and literally; despite his comment about her being hung up with him, Max had been the older brother through and through, smiling at her and letting her ride on his shoulders. She would miss him horridly when he was at Vietnam, she realized. So, she had taken inspiration from the white-clad protestors and run off to the circus; there she had found happiness with roller skates and a red-haired ex-meter maid contortionist.
Rita was Prudence's first girlfriend, supportive and edgy; she had been the one to flirt with Prudence, the one who kissed her and tugged at Prudence's shirt. When she had agreed to follow Prudence back to New York, Prudence had been ecstatic and completely in love.
Things had been good, yeah. Prudence had cried for days when Max, her brother in all but blood, was shipped to Vietnam. When Jude was deported, she'd been sad - but Max was back, fucked up and they would only let family see him, but he was back, and she was in love with Rita.
Things had been so good! The rooftop concert had gone so well. She had shrieked with glee when she saw Jude, she had been so happy for the rekindled relationships between Sadie and Jojo, Lucy and Jude. Things had been better than good, they had been great. Max was finally himself again, finally healing now that Jude was back and all was right with the world.
Until, of course, the day Lucy returned, holding two weeks' worth of rent in one hand and wiping her eyes with the other. Prudence had shrugged off Rita's embrace, moving to her friend, wiping away her tears and leading her to the couch. "I tried to be understanding," she said. "I - I guess I knew. I guess I knew why Max was so sad when Jude wasn't there at the hospital, why he was so happy when Jude returned. He was there first and Jude - he still doesn't understand why I rally for these causes. I figured - I figured I'd try to end things on a happy note. I figured it would be best for all of us."
Rita had looked on distastefully as Prudence led Lucy to her shoulder, kissing the side of Lucy's head affectionately. It was barely two weeks later that Rita very bluntly informed Prudence she was leaving her and going back to Mr. Kite's circus. "I can't be free around you," she said. "I want to perform. And I don't want you."
Prudence had faltered, feeling her throat close. She'd tried to explain she loved Rita, she'd follow her - but Rita's face contorted and she spat out, "Why don't you go follow that pretty little blonde bimbo instead?" and slammed the door.
Later, Max and Jude showed up at the apartment; while Max had given money to Sadie and tried to explain that they couldn't make rent on his income, Prudence overheard Jude telling Lucy something about Max and nightmares and how he didn't want things to be awkward between the two of them. That night, Lucy moved into Prudence's room and shared Prudence's bed, freeing Jude and Max's old room. Lucy had let Prudence cuddle next to her as the two girls tried to ignore the noises coming through the wall.
Though Lucy and Jude tried their hardest to "not be awkward," Prudence could smell the tension. She could also recognize the glances and touches between Max and Jude, and she was sure Lucy could, too. Yet she couldn't complain; with each passing day Lucy grew closer to her, making time to spend with her. Max once made an offhanded comment to Prudence about Lucy never doing that for Jude, and gave her a wink.
It wasn't like Prudence was blind. Prudence was used to being the affectionate one, and Lucy used to allow it, maybe throw her arm across Prudence's shoulders, but never reciprocate in turn. Lucy was a woman of words and action - words for comfort, action for her need to make a difference. She could be sly and coy and fierce, but she rarely went out of her way to display physical affection. Yet she had begun to curl up next to Prudence at night and smile at her in the morning.
One morning Lucy had woken up, put on her waitress uniform, walked into the kitchen area, and kissed Prudence on the cheek. Jude had stopped, Max had grabbed Jude's arm, and Jojo looked up from his breakfast. "Good morning," Lucy had said; "Good morning," Prudence returned. "I have to go, I took the early shift so I could make a women's rights rally," and she left.
"Did she just kiss you goodbye?" Jude asked. Prudence had shrugged. "B-but -"
"Come on, she's allowed to move on, it's been three months," came Sadie's voice as the woman hung from her bedroom doorframe. "Now could you all shut up and let me get my beauty sleep?"
Max left to run red lights and evade pedestrians and soon, Sadie and Jojo left to practice at Cafe Huh?; that left Jude, starving artist, and Prudence, who was between jobs. So, as Jude sat curled on the couch, tapping his forehead with charcoal and staring at a blank piece of paper, Prudence threw her arms around his neck from behind and whined "Juuuuuude."
"Hello hello, I'm trying to work," Jude had responded, not unkindly. "Bullshit," Prudence had quipped, "you're too frustrated. About Lucy."
"Yeh, well. I can't blame her, there's not much a girl can do when her boyfriend prefers camping on the couch with her brother as opposed to sleeping in the bed with her."
Prudence hadn't said anything, just kissed his cheek after a moment and grabbed the stick of charcoal, drawing a little heart in the middle of the paper.
Jude had smiled affectionately as Max burst through the front door, yelling about tourists and demanding Jude get over there and carry him to bed. "To sleep. Damn it, Pru," he'd clarified half-annoyed and half-amused in response to Prudence's giggles.
After dinnertime Prudence spotted Max smoking by the window, his face holding the brooding hardness he'd acquired post-Vietnam. Most evaded Max when he was in one of his moods, but Prudence was ever the exception, the one who could anger none. She sat beside him, tucking her hair behind her ear, questioning "What's up?" after a moment.
"Nothing," grunted Max, taking his cigarette from his mouth. "Just worrying about Lucy. And trying to wrap my head around the idea of her having...feelings for you."
"She'll be fine," Prudence said, evading the other issue. "Women's rights rallies aren't as violent as the antiwar ones."
"Yeah, well, I still worry." He inhaled from his cigarette, blowing out smoke from the corner of his mouth. After a moment he continued, "What are you going to do about Lucy? I'm fine with it, you know."
Prudence shrugged. "I don't want to do anything to hurt Jude..."
Max barked abruptly, a harsh, coughing sound filled with gunshot. Prudence didn't like it. "Come on, Pru. It's going to hurt him no matter how long he has, no matter if you don't do anything. Breakups are always a sore wound. He'll get over it." A grin flashed on his face. "Besides, you're practically another sister, anyways."
It was barely a week later that Lucy sat on the floor, talking about the news, while Prudence sat on the couch, brushing Lucy's hair and smiling at the fervor with which the other girl spoke. "There's just so much change going on! Did you hear about that riot up in Greenwich? I don't really approve of the violence, but it's really going to change things. People aren't going to be able to ignore that people like - well, like you exist, people like...people like me, I guess."
Prudence stopped brushing Lucy's hair as the girl turned, eyes pleading for something - acceptance, Prudence realized. It was an odd thing to see on a woman so strong as Lucy. "What do you mean, you?"
"I mean, maybe," Lucy halted, then began again, topic switched. "Why did you and Rita break up?"
For a moment Prudence's heart stung, and she understood part of what Jude felt. She brushed it off. "She thought I was interested in you."
"So she noticed, then? That I...well, that I'm...I like you." She moved onto the couch beside Prudence. "And I could very easily fall for you."
Prudence brushed Lucy's hair from her face, tentatively resting her fingers along the junction between Lucy's neck and shoulder. She leant forward, placing her lips lightly upon the other girl's; she could feel Lucy falter before returning the gesture. There were no fireworks, no butterflies, but Prudence liked it; it was real and sincere and honest, and with Lucy came the sun. "I could fall for you too," Prudence murmured.
"I've never done anything like this with another girl before," Lucy admitted.
Prudence looked at the blonde girl, with her pink face and blue, hopeful eyes, and a plan began to formulate in her mind. "Would you like to go to bed?"
A nervous nod and a flush of face, and the two girls led each other to their bed, locking the door behind them.
Prudence woke from golden slumbers to Lucy shifting beneath her arm, the other girl slipping out deftly. Prudence pretended to remain asleep, but watched the girl through cracked eyelids; Lucy's long blonde hair flowed down her bare back, still slightly messed from the previous night's activities. Lucy was straighter, perhaps, than most women, but she retained soft, subtle curves that caught the morning light, her hair radiating like the sun. Prudence shifted onto her arm, thinking perhaps that's just one reason Jude was so fond of drawing her.
Lucy turned at the movement. "Did I wake you?" she asked, buttoning her shirt.
"Yeah," said Prudence. For a moment Lucy looked worried, but then she caught Prudence's smile and smiled in turn, a smile of relief and joy which only made warm happiness rise in Prudence's chest.
Lucy leant over, kissing the side of Prudence's mouth, and Prudence had rested her hand along the hem of Lucy's shirt. After a moment she tugged slightly, which made Lucy fall back into bed, and Lucy laughs into her mouth. "We have to get up," she protested, but slipped a hand beneath the covers, and Prudence felt Lucy's thumb tracing the line of her hip bone.
Prudence had laughed while raining kisses on Lucy's mouth, cheeks, eyelids. Two hours later they had finally emerged from their den, still laughing as Prudence smoothed her shirt and Lucy smoothed her hair.
"You two look awful happy," Sadie had commented. Lucy had grinned and Prudence had chirped that love made everyone feel fine. Sadie had halted, a grin spreading across her face, and she embraced the two girls, kissing their foreheads.
Prudence turned to see Jude looking at her from the couch; she unlaced her fingers from Lucy's, and walked over to him. "It's okay, right?" she questioned, and to her delight Jude had smiled softly with a "yeh." Lucy rushed over and dragged Prudence onto the couch, possessed by élan; Prudence realized the rush as Max closely followed, dropping roughly into Jude's lap and ignoring the Brit's protests. Yet all Prudence heard was happiness, and with her hand in Lucy's, Jude and Max arguing lightheartedly to one side, and Sadie and Jojo dancing to the other, Prudence had fervently hoped the moment would last all through her life.
A/N: I posted this at my LJ last week, but I remembered I have this account and should like, post something here once in a while. So here you go.
I BELIEVE THIS MAY BE THE FIRST LUCY/PRU FIC TO EVER GRACE THE INTERNET. Please be proving me wrong as I quite enjoy this pairing. :C