The Abyss, one of the world's greatest mysteries, to this day only a tiny fraction of it has been explored, in fact we don't even know how deep it goes. Traversing the Abyss is dangerous business, so people get training to go down there, the explorer classes are as such, the red whistles, the blue whistles, the purple whistles, the black whistles, and the white whistles. Some aspire to be the greatest explorers, the white whistles, some don't care, some are just insane, the abyss attracts all sorts of people, and an unlikely group of kids would soon find that the abyss is more treacherous than they could have possibly imagined.

"Well fellas, the day is approaching." said Aidan "Um, yeah, I guess it is" said Sean nonchalantly "Listen Aidan we've been alive for 16 years we don't need you to remind us when our birthday is." said Bryan "Jeez, sorry man I didn't think it was a big fucking deal." said Aidan "Well it is, even if we are triplets, I really don't care for any of you." said Sean.

"Well fuck you too" said Aidan "Oh I'm sorry Aidan, remember that time I never cared what you thought of me?" said Sean "Jesus Sean" said Bryan while giggling at Aidan's expense "Man, stop fucking laughing, why doesn't anyone ever side with me?" complained Aidan like a fucking pussy. "Hopefully by the time our joint birthday rolls around you'll both be a bit nicer." he continued.

The trio heard an opening door and the sound of footsteps as they turned to see their friend Bennett, he casually approached them on the orphanage balcony overlooking the abyss "So what are you guys talking about?" he asked "Just our birthday" said Sean "OH YEAH!" yelled Bennett completely unnecessarily, remembering something important "I forgot to tell you guys, you'll totally die before your birthday, but only if you're looking forward to it." he said.

"Um, are you sure?" asked Bryan "Well, no, not really, we don't have 100% proof, so maybe I jumped the gun a bit." he said "Yeah, you did" said Sean "I don't know guys, maybe it's true" said Aidan "Yeah well I would expect a christian to say some stupid shit like that." said Sean, but just then at that moment, fate hit those boys like Riko hit Reg in the asshole with that stick.

Some random jackass was just walking down the alleyway beneath the balcony spewing some worthless garbage out of his mouth when he became an example to our characters of why fate should not be tempted "Boy oh boy, I can't wait for my birthday tomorrow!" he said enthusiastically, now hold the phone fucker, because suddenly, in a freak accident unparallelled by anything ever seen before by the human race, the boy fell backwards and hit his head on the ground. The force shattered his skull completely, like a smashed watermelon, just bloody brain pulp everywhere.

The group's minds were fucking obliterated by what they had just seen, Sean and Bryan whirled toward Aidan in bewilderment, not really at the fact that some kid just brutally died, but just the fact that Aidan was right about something. "Well, I guess that doesn't really prove it, but it's good evidence, do you guys really want to risk that happening to you?" asked Aidan.

"I kinda just want to know what made him fall over." commented Sean "Yeah it was weird, it looked like something made him lose balance." said Bryan "But what on Earth is capable of causing such a dramatic slip? Wait a second…. Don't tell me it's….." said Aidan as they all slowly turned to Bennett who was just standing there looking like a retarded flamingo, a line of drool dripping out of his dopey looking mouth unevenly plastered on his lax face, but it was not his moronic expression that disturbed our heroes, it was the thing Bennett was holding in his hand.

"BENNETT I HAVE BEEN TELLING YOU EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR THE PAST 10 YEARS NOT TO PUT THAT MUCH KETCHUP ON YOUR FUCKING SANDWICH! AND NOW LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE, SOME GUY SLIPPED AND DIED!" said Sean as he smacked the sandwich bennett was holding away from him, a trail of excessive condiments left in its wake, Bennett's unconcerned face followed the path of his lost food item in vacancy, completely unsympathetic towards the child he inadvertently murdered.

Aidan and Bryan turned away from the other two, they didn't care to see them fight, they only wanted to see the true nature of that child's death. And it was revealed to them, for by his feet was an enormous puddle of ketchup with a very distinct footprint in it, proving that the kid did in fact slip on Bennett's ketchup and die.

"Bennett you definitely just killed someone." said Bryan "Meh, it's whatever" said Bennett with that classic Bennett expression on his face, you know the one, where his eyebrows are narrowed and he looks upset at what you said, but you can't take him seriously because of all of the ketchup on his face, vintage Bennett right there "Yeah Bennett I'm not entirely comfortable with that answer." said Sean "They're going to find out it was you, he died right next to the orphanage and you are the only one who uses that much ketchup, you should turn yourself in before things get worse."

"But I don't want to go to jail." said Bennett "Maybe if I just leave him there people will think he died from that birthday epidemic." "Bennett, you literally killed someone, you can't just get away with that!" said Sean "Why not?" asked Bennett "WHY NOT!?" asked Bryan and Sean in unison "I don't know guys, I kinda agree with Bennett on this one, if we don't tell them, they don't know." said Aidan "Do you not care that you ended the life of another human being?" Sean asked.

"What do you mean do I care? Do you care? I didn't think it was a big deal, some guy just happened to die, it happens all the time, it's just that this time we saw it happen, if we ignore it should be fine." said Aidan "YOU DIDN'T THINK IT WAS A BI- oh my god, Aidan!" started Bryan on one of his rants "Aidan you can't just kill people, like, what the fuck? I'm actually upset about this right now, this isn't part of the meme anymore!" said Bryan.

"Um, Bryan are you okay?" asked Sean "No! Did you hear me? I said I wasn't kidding! My feelings aren't a joke Sean, I'm actually mad for real this time, I'm not doing these fucking memes anymore, it's stupid!" said Bryan "B-Bryan, relax it's just a fanfiction." said Bennett "Fuck the Fanfiction! You think that you can pay me to be in this and expect me to turn death into a comedy skit? What the fuck is wrong with you people? I didn't even want to be in this, but you guys made me, and now I'm involved in an actual murder, this isn't a fake death, we didn't fake kill that guy for a story, he's really dead, his body is right down there! We killed him!" said Bryan.

"We killed him"