Disclaimer: Mokona does not belong to me. They belong to the group of evil genius known as CLAMP.
The blizzard blew all night, harsh and cold
The blizzard blew all night, harsh and cold. There was no sign of life anywhere across the snow covered mountain, but at the bottom was a small village. Compared to the dark, bitter storm, the village was warm and merry. Some villagers were inside the tavern, drinking beer and partying.
Suddenly, the door opens and snow whirls into the room as the lights go out. Everyone grows silent and stares in shocked disbelief at the figure silhouetted through the door frame. The blizzard had died down and the clouds had cleared. The full moon shone, casting the shadow of the figure over the entire room.
"W-who are you?" demanded the tavern owner.
"Who am I?" the figure asked with a smile. "I'm MOKONA MODOKI!" With his exclamation, the lights came back on with everyone wondering what the hell was going on.
--
They watched as Mokona chugged down yet another bottle of booze without ill effects. By now, he had an impressive pile of bottles surrounding him on all sides.
"Really Boss, what is this thing?" asked one of the guys.
The tavern owner listed, "It's white, it looks like a pork bun, it has ears like a rabbit, it can talk, it can drink booze without harm, and it pierced one of its ears…" He snapped his fingers. "It must be one of those so-called 'gothic punks!'"
"No, it's an alien come from outer space to take over the human race!"
"Wrong, it's an escaped lab experiment running away from a mad scientist who was cruelly abusing it!"
"Actually, it's a strange creature created by a man named Clow Reed and the time-dimension witch Ichihara Yuuko to help a group of kids travel through different worlds and keep them in contact with her using its twin in an extremely complicated story written and drawn by the famous mangaka CLAMP."
"Nah, that can't be right. If you add all its features together, it makes sense to say that it's an offspring of a pork bun turned punk who picked up a gothic rabbit for a one night stand."
Everyone began nodding at this latest hypothesis. "You're right…that makes the most sense."
"But…Mokona is Mokona!" Mokona said indignantly.
"Well, whatever you are, we'll call you Mokona," said the tavern owner. "What brings you here tonight, Mokona?"
"Mokona is looking for his friend," replied Mokona. "Listen to this…Mokona's friend has been…ABDUCTED AGAINST HIS WILL AND WITHOUT HIS CONSENT!"
"That's terrible," said one of the men there. "So that means your friend's been…"
"Yes, it means…" Mokona put on a serious expression. "Mokona's friend has been ABDUCTED AGAINST HIS WILL AND WITHOUT HIS CONSENT!"
"There's no need to repeat yourself!"
"More importantly, shouldn't you be out there looking?"
"Eh? But…Mokona wanted a drink…."
"Speaking of drinks Mokona, will you be paying for these?" asked the tavern owner, pointing at the sea of bottles that Mokona had chugged down within the last half hour.
"Well, time to look for Mokona's friend! Thank you for the drinks!" Mokona quickly hopped out the door.
"Hey, what are you going to do about the payment?!"
--
Mokona had on his cowboy hat and traveling bag. He stood in front of a huge ancient castle that sat at the top of the mountain. The castle doors were locked and dead bolted, making entry impossible. The white pork bun went up to the castle doors and kicked them opened.
"Mokona! How did you get in?!" the castle guards demanded.
"One of Mokona's 108 Secret Techniques: Super Powerful Kick!" Mokona exclaimed happily. "Now give Mokona's friend back to Mokona!"
"Never! We have strict orders to keep your friend here at all costs!"
"But…Mokona even brought the best wine in the area as an exchange…" Mokona brought out the bottles from his bag. "It was so difficult for Mokona…dragging these up by himself…"
The captain said, "But…you see…orders from the top…"
"Also…Mokona's been feeling…so lonely…without Mokona's friend…." Mokona looked like he was about to burst into tears any moment.
All the guards began to feel guilty, especially the captain. "Wait! Don't cry…well…we don't really need to keep Mokona's friend here do we?" Everyone shook their heads. "We'll take the wine since you went to all the trouble of bringing it up."
Mokona's plan has worked! thought Mokona with an evil glint in his eyes which the guards missed.
"Your friend is down in the dungeons," added the captain as they began opening the bottles.
"WHAT?!" Mokona rushed down to the dungeons and opened the door. "MOKONA! Is Mokona too late?"
"What took Mokona so long?" asked the black Mokona. He pointed to a digital clock that was flashing 00:00. "Time's up! Mokona wins!"
"Aw…Mokona lost?" the white one sat down dejectly. The black one patted the white one. "Don't worry. This time it's Mokona's turn! Let's start-"
"Wait!" the white Mokona said. He took out a stack of paper, went back up, dropped them next to the captain who was sleeping in a drunken stupor, and came back. "Now we can begin!"
"What was that?" asked black Mokona.
"The tabs for all the wine Mokona brought, the drinks Mokona had, and the things Mokona sent to Yuuko. Altogether, Mokona believes it's about 100,000,000."
"Will the guards be able to pay all that?" wondered black Mokona.
"They will…eventually…" said white Mokona. "Now…let Mokona commence…Hide-and-Go-Seek-Across-the-Worlds Round 2! Mokona will never find Mokona!" With that, the white Mokona spread his wings and disappeared.
The black Mokona began counting, "One Mokona, two Mokona, three Mokona…"