Okay I've had this idea floating around in my head for so long now. Finally it's written out and a lot longer than the one shot I was planning. This loosely follows my other one shot Office Observations, again following the partnership of Reid and my oc Claire. I hope everyone enjoys this as much as they liked that one.


It was a calculated move, one that could potentially end with them both hurt or at least her. Reid slid further down on the couch, holding onto her as she lay on top of him. They both needed sleep and he didn't have the heart to wake her.

Sitting in his living room, he was overwhelmed by the smell of her. For the last two weeks, she had lived here with him. It would probably take another month for the apartment to return to normal. Her scent would linger, clothing would be left behind, and he knew it would take a while for him to correct everything she'd done to his bookshelves.

In a way, he didn't want their time together to end. It had been the longest relationship he'd ever had, even though it was the furthest thing from what they were doing. He held onto her tighter not wanting to let her go.

"You need to get some sleep too." She whispered, turning slightly in order to look into his eyes. "That big brain of yours won't work right on zero sleep."

"I'm fine, go back to sleep."

"You know nothing's going to happen to you with me here." She smiled softly, running her hand up his cheek. She put her forehead against his, closing her eyes. "I've got you."

"This doesn't have to end, you know." He pulled her closer into his chest. "You could stay."

"I wish I could, but you know we can't do that. I can't do that." She bit her lip to stop the quivering. The look in his eyes hurt her more than anything she'd ever experienced before. "Please don't look at me like that Spence." She ran her thumb over his cheek as her fingers tangled in his hair.

"No, I know. It was stupid to ask. I just like having you around."

"Who says I'm going anywhere?"

"It won't be like this. We can't have this again."

"Maybe you're right, but let's just enjoy it while we can." She leaned up and chastely kissed his forehead before snuggling into his chest. A tear escaped her lashes as she felt his hand curl around the exposed skin at her hip, securing her to him.

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Claire pounded on the door to Reid's apartment. She let all her frustration out on the piece of wood before he opened. There were times when work was demanding, but what Gideon had just asked her was crossing a line. Again her fist connected with the door.

"What?" Reid's voice called from inside.

"Open up, Reid. I'm not going anywhere until you let me in."

She flinched back as the door was pulled harshly open. "What, Claire? Why are you here?"

"Playing the messenger, Gideon's putting you on sick leave indefinitely, or until you can prove you're off whatever it is that's got you so strung out."

"I…I don't know," he faltered. Claire took this opportunity to push her way through the door.

"You're a terrible liar. That's why I can beat you at poker, you have a slight twitch in the corner of your eye."

"Why send you? He could've brought this over himself." He fingered the white envelope.

"Let's look at it this way, he's your superior. If he came to you about the drugs, then he'd be liable to tell Strauss or someone higher. I'm a safer bet."

"Well, thanks. I can handle it." He moved back to the door.

"Not a chance, smarty pants." She let the duffle bag fall off her shoulders. "I drew the short straw and get to be the one that helps you. So give me the bottles, all of them.

"I don't need your help, Claire." He said still holding the door open for her to take the hint.

"What part of your not getting rid of me, don't you understand?" Claire took an unmoving stance at the entrance of his kitchen. "You're going to have a tough couple of days ahead of you. Someone should be here with you."

"You're going to stay here with me? That's not exactly comforting news, Claire."

"I'll give you five minutes to get all the bottles for I'll tear this place apart looking for them." Claire leveled her gaze at her fellow agent.

Reid had seen this look dozens of times; she used it on suspects or anyone that tried to make her feel inferior. If he knew anything about the woman in front of him, it was that she took nobody's crap. He'd always admired her for that. Through their competitive nature, there was also admiration. In those moments of peace, he could see them being friends.

"Three minutes, Spencer, or I will start opening walls."

"Okay, give me a minute." He left her at the entrance. In a matter of minutes he was back with a small handful of bottles.

"This is it?" She asked, trying to watch for his tell.

"What are you going to do with them?" He lined them up carefully in front of her, not meeting her gaze.

"I've got people who know people. Let me worry about disposal. I'll bring back a pizza and maybe some beers."

"You always said pizza and beer was the best way to get over a case." He smiled weakly at her.

"I won't be long."

As soon as the latch clicked, he moved back into the living room. Falling heavily on the couch Reid allowed his last hit to take effect. Claire would be gone for at least an hour. She would take the medication to the guy she knew at the ER, flirt- or catch up as she called it, and then head across town to the only place that had the New York style pizza she likes. This gave him plenty of time to relax one last time, allows his brain to shut off and have peace for a little while. He knew the moment Claire got back she'd watch him like a hawk.

Even though they were getting along better, within the last week hostility had crept back into their relationship. Reid wanted to take full responsibility, but he couldn't help but step up whenever Claire decided to antagonize him. It was how they worked, egging each other on to do more, be better. It wasn't surprising when he finally snapped. There was no more banter, instead every word she said was met with a quick dismissal. She hardly said a full sentence to him before showing up on his doorstep.

Two weeks ago he thought she could be one of his closest friends. He wanted to weigh his options, the prospect of a close friend, or the enjoyment of a few hours of peace. Today he would go with peace.

"Hey, I got pizza and a few movies." Claire announced as she came through the door.

"Great," Reid drew out the word as she took a seat on the opposite side of the couch.

"I'm starving, so eat what you want, although you should probably take it easy."

"And why's that?" He barely glanced at her as he took a slice.

"When was the last time you used?"

"I can't remember."

"Terrible liar," she rolled her eyes. "Please make this easier on both of us."

He watched her, the hurt and worry in her eyes. Never before had he seen her look at him that way. "Just before you left."

"I figured, tonight's not going to be fun. Eat light and drink water."

"Withdrawal," he sighed. Before she showed up he'd already felt the slight tremors in his limbs. "I can take care of myself, Claire."

"Really, that's what you think?" She eyed him carefully. "Fine, but I'm not leaving. I'll stay on the couch."

The rest of the night was cold. Claire did as she said, keeping to herself on the corner of the couch. Reid tried to keep a normal routine, but it was hard with the presence of his partner. Eventually, he turned in, closing the door to get some separation between the two. But even then, he couldn't sleep knowing she was curled up on his couch didn't ease his mind.

In the middle of the night, Reid tried his hardest to stay quiet. The last thing he wanted was to wake Claire. He clung to the side of the toilet bowl as the contents of his stomach were expelled. Even after he knew everything was gone he continued to heave. It wasn't until he slumped against the bathtub that he saw Claire in the doorway. Again he noticed how she looked at him with hurt eyes. He wanted to ask her why.

"I'll bring you some water." She spoke barely above a whisper. When he heard the water running, he slammed the door and locked it. His mind raced through a solution. There was an easier way to do this. With trembling hands he stood with the support of the sink.

"Reid, open up." Claire's voice called through the door. "Let me help."

Various things fell from the cabinet before he took the small bottle in his hands. Again he was on the cold tiles, staring at the clear liquid. Maybe he could just take smaller amounts, ease himself off slowly. Holding the needle, he tried to steady his hand enough to get to a vein. He cursed loudly as he missed.

"Spencer, open the door." Claire yelled as she pounded a fist against the door. She turned the knob, but still couldn't get in. He wondered how long it would take her before she tried to use her gun. It took all his will power to ignore her and try again with the needle. Another miss and blood slowly spilled down his arm. A loud bang and Claire stumbled through the door.

"Jesus, Spencer." She reached for the bottle, smashing it in the tub and taking the syringe.

"I said I could handle it myself." He sighed.

"This is handling it? How many more do you have?" She screamed down at him.

"That was it," he said quietly. Reaching up for a towel his arm barely extended up the wall.

"Lying," she yelled again. "I'm tired of you lying to me. You're my partner, Reid, we're supposed to trust each other."

With that she dropped the towel on him and moved back through the apartment. Less than a minute later he heard a loud crash from the living room. He knew this is what she'd do once she saw he had another hidden. On unsteady legs Spencer made his way into the bedroom. Through the doorway he could see the mounds of books scattered on the living room floor. He could only imagine what his kitchen looked like.

In a flurry of wild hair and flailing arms she was back in the bedroom. Without shame she went through every drawer throwing its contents. It only took her a few minutes to move back into the bathroom. Reid speculated that this was the reason behind Gideon choosing Claire to babysit him, her ability to thoroughly clear a situation. It would no doubt take him days to get the apartment back to the way it was. All he needed was for her to leave.

"Are you finished?" He asked as he saw her stand in front of the mirror.

"Yeah," her voice was small, but she moved to stand straighter with confidence. "I found two more. Now would be the best time to tell me if I missed one."

"That's it I swear."

Again sad eyes stared into his.

"Let me look at your arm." Claire's small hand held his arm delicately as she peeled the soiled towel away from the holes. "Can you walk?"

With a nod, Reid silently followed her into the bathroom. It was then that he noticed the tub was cleaned out. She let him sit on the edge as she cleaned his self-inflicted wounds. After her destruction to his apartment, her gentle care for him was a bit mind-boggling. He couldn't look at her as she ran a wash cloth down his arm inducing goose bumps across his skin. If she noticed, she kept it to herself.

"Do you still feel sick?" She asked.

"A little but there's nothing left to throw up, I should probably just try to sleep."

"You feel a bit warm, but that's a normal side effect. The shaking is only going to get worse, so is the pain." She took a bottle out of the cabinet. "Take two of these, and drink this glass. It should help for a little while."

"Thanks," he said as she moved to the door. "And Claire thanks for stopping me. I'm sorry I lied."

"Just don't let it happen again." For the first time Claire smiled at him. It was probably the first real smile he'd seen from her in weeks.

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The sun tried to make its way through the blinds in Reid's room, but the beams barely made a dent in the darkness he laid in. He tried to stay curled as tightly as possible around himself. The pain wasn't too bad. A couple more hours and he knew the worst of it would be over. Every thirty minutes he noticed Claire peak in at him from over the couch. Other than that the two stayed to themselves.

"Claire," Reid tried to call out to her as he moved from the bed. She came in a he crawled into the bathroom.

"Hey, let me help." She reached out for him.

"I need something for the pain."

Nodding she stood in front of the cabinet. Claire took the bottle out and left to get a glass of water. Reid never thought that he'd rely so heavily on someone. Claire had been his partner for years, but he never needed her like he did now. The relief he felt as she re-entered the room washed over him with ease. She knelt down beside him, pouring the pills into his hand. He looked up at her with unsure eyes.

"That's all I can give you." Her voice was small. "I'm sorry, they'll have to work."

"These won't even help with the headaches."

"I can't give you anything stronger. Take these and lay down." She handed him the glass of water.

Claire stayed in the bathroom with him as he spent most of the morning alternating between painful cried and dry gags. There wasn't anything she could do besides rub his back soothingly. Closer to the afternoon, Claire was slipping in and out of sleep. Reid tried to focus on her instead of the pain. She seemed so much younger and peaceful in sleep. He couldn't stop his hand from reaching out and tucking her hair behind her ear.

"What's wrong?" She stirred awake. "Spence?"

"You fell asleep."

"I'm sorry, do you need something?" She repositioned herself against the wall.

"I think I'd feel better in bed." He began getting off the floor. "And you need sleep."

"Let me help you." She wrapped his arm around her shoulder as they moved into the other room.

Compared to the cold tile of the bathroom floor, Reid enjoyed the heat radiating off Claire. He was sad as she let him down on the edge of the bed. Reluctantly, he let his arm leave her. The cool sheets did nothing to comfort him. Although he felt the sweat coating his body, he needed warmth. He couldn't form the words to make her stay; he just hoped he could convey it in his eyes.

Claire gave him one last look before walking out the door. He tried not to let the disappointment get to him. They weren't in tune with each other anymore. He couldn't expect her to still know him like before. Carefully he moved further on the bed, trying to avoid the pain his body was in.

"Hey, where are you going?" Claire called as she came back with a damp cloth. "Lay back, this should help."

Claire sat on the edge of his bed, gently placing the cloth on his forehead. "Would you mind…" He tried to ask, but she covered his mouth.

"It would be even better if you could shut your mind off, but I'll take your mouth. Please stop talking."

Reid nodded his head, closing his eyes against the cool cloth under her hand. He heard her let out a long sigh before feeling the bed shift. Carefully he cracked an eye open to see Claire lying beside him. On her side, she had a hand on his head and the other holding her head up. She was close enough, and the last thing he wanted was to push her way.

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"We have another case, we just got back." Claire said into her phone. She glanced into the bedroom where Reid was still sleeping. "Hotch, you're sure you need me on this?"

"How's it going there?"

"He's sleeping, but I'm afraid if I leave now he won't make it through the day. Just give me two more days."

"We'll make do without the two of you, but be back by Wednesday. He needs to be able to be on his own."

"I know, it's just hard for me to leave him. Three days should be good. Thanks, Hotch."

Again her eyes landed on her sleeping partner. As quietly as possible she moved into the kitchen to pour another cup of coffee. Getting a glimpse of herself in the glass of the microwave she sighed. Two days without a goodnights sleep and shower was wearing her down. Gulping down her third cup of coffee in an hour, she pulled her hair up and set to work cleaning the living room.

It had been dramatic but called for. In her line of work, Claire knew how to get what she wanted from someone. Knowing them personally only made it easier. To say that she wasn't a little angry as well could be her biggest lie. Tearing apart his apartment made things easier. After the last couple of weeks they had together, she knew he was pushing her away and Claire didn't do well with being pushed.

It took her all afternoon, but she put the living room back together as best she could. Quietly, she took the clothes she threw around his bedroom and brought them out to be refolded or hung. Occasionally she would glance in on him, watching as he tried to hold onto sleep through the pain. Eventually he woke in the throes of painful cries. Claire nearly jumped over the couch to get to him. With a glass of water and a bottle of mild ibuprofen, she found herself again on the cold tiles. A few more hours with him and she was exhausted.

"Is there anything else you need?" Claire asked as she helped him into bed again.

"Did you clean?" His voice was raspy as he saw her turn to the bathroom.

"A little, I kept stepping on books." She smiled and placed a glass on his nightstand. "Night, Spence." She flicked the lights off and carefully moved to the couch for what little sleep it would offer.

Claire was woken by a loud crashing sound from further in the apartment. Nearly falling off the couch, she headed into Reid's room finding the bathroom door open.

"Reid," she called worried. "Are you okay?"

"Fine, just couldn't keep all the water down." He sighed, leaned over the toilet.

"I'm sorry, another day and you should be back to normal." She slid down next to him against the tub.

"How do you know all this? Why did Gideon send you?"

"Everyone has their secrets." She sighed.

"Claire, you've seen me puke my guts out and tore my apartment to shreds, I think we're passed the keeping secrets." He turned to look at her, brown eyes locking with her blue.

"I have an older brother, Mark, he's my dad's pride and joy. There was a time when he had a problem, heroin. He was addicted for five years off and on. I was there when he finally decided to get clean."

"How old were you?"

"Sixteen, my dad was a detective and someone needed to be home with Mark. I was there for him when he really needed me." She smiled sadly at him. "This is my area of expertise."

"I'm sorry, I didn't know." He said, placing a hand on her knee. Hesitantly, she curled her fingers over it.

"No one did, not even Gideon." Again they locked eyes. "He asked if I'd check on you, and I volunteered to help. I need you back." She felt her eyes sting with tears. "As much as I hate you most of the time, you're my best friend."

"You're mine too, Claire." He said, leaning over to rest his head against her. As an afterthought he pressed his lips to her temple. A small laugh escaped her lips.

"You need to brush your teeth, and probably shower." She ran her hand through his hair. "It'll make you feel better."

"Okay, you should go back to sleep, take the bed if you want."

Alone in the room, Claire stared at the bed in front of her. Female instinct took over and she pulled the comforter and pillows off. He needed fresh sheets anyway she tried to tell herself. It didn't take her long to put together the bed again, and by that time she heard the water running, steam escaping through the small crack in the bathroom door. She curled up on the furthest side from the door and let her exhaustion take over. In the past three days she hadn't had a single moment to take a calming breath.