A/n: This is a short (story) on Lily and Severus before any mistakes were made on either of their behalves. This is set in the autumn/fall of their 4th year, both on the verge of turning 15. This is possibly a first in a series of shorts either inspired by or put to Josh Groban lyrics. If anyone has not heard of this amazing vocalist, I would implore you to Youtube him. If anyone has seen the movie Troy and actually listened to the song on the credits, this is the same vocalist. I would recommend listening to this song while reading it.
Disclaimer: (Jeeze, I haven't done one of these in a while) I own pretty much nothing but the general storyline, which was inspired by both Josh Groban and JK Rowling. I own none of the characters mentioned or implied herein.
An Afternoon Spent Finding Solace
Josh Groban – When You Say You Love Me
"Like the sound of silence calling,
I hear your voice and suddenly
I'm falling, lost in a dream.
Like the echoes of our souls are meeting,
You say those words and my heart stops beating.
I wonder what it means.
What could it be that comes over me?
At times I can't move.
At times I can hardly breathe."
"I love you, Sev."
I close my eyes. I would wish that this moment would just come to a stop, gently breaking down at the sound of those words escaping the threshold of her soft lips, of whom I have only dreamed of kissing back. I look down to my lap, a rare smile materializing lightly at the girl I held against me.
A book, entitled Watership Down, on her stomach, and my arm hung loosely around her waist, she was laying up against me; With her head nearly in my lap, her hair acts on its own accord. A lock of red waves lay here and there, littering haphazardly over the ground and my legs. The last bit of a warm breeze picks up and twirls the few stray strands that outline her features, playing with them in the autumn light to make them appear like glowing embers.
Taking my silence as a prompt for her to continue, she sighs, asking, "How are we changing, Sev? It may be just me, but... we've been growing apart since last year... And I don't know how to stop it... I don't want to forget our friendship, ever... But we're not the ones changing. We're being pulled, aren't we? I feel it. I have felt it since we came here... away from our families but into the arms of prejudicial companions. "
I don't quite know what to say to that. I have felt... No, I do still feel that way. I have for a while.
"I don't know Lily. Life is wearing at us. We have been handed very different paths, you and I. But... Even against all of that... we can pull through it. We've come this far, haven't we?"
I brush some of her hair out of her face. Her olive eyes were watching me, looking for what I was really saying. She could always tell what I left unsaid by her uncanny gift to read people like a book of hers; her thirst for knowledge never seemed to end at her bookshelf. If I had my wish, I would drown in her eyes, letting her scour every bit of information out of me that she could possibly find in this thick head of mine.
"You're the one I've always thought of.
I don't know how, but I feel sheltered in your love.
You're where I belong.
And when you're with me if I close my eyes,
There are times I swear I feel like I can fly
For a moment in time.
Somewhere between the Heavens and Earth ,
And frozen in time, Oh when you say those words."
"Sev..." She furrowed her brows, not understanding. Her silence led me to explain.
"Well, we fit in alright where we are, don't we? You have your fiery temper and your stubborn bravery... which is befitting of your company and your house... And I have my solitude and presumptions... which is considered suitable for someone of my position by my peers and my own house. Yes, we've always been like this, really... but we never quite had a choice of which company we were placed with, did we?"
Her nose scrunched up like it always did when she came to realize something she did not like or wished to acknowledge.
"No... I guess we never did."
She was silent for a moment, deep in thought.
"Sev?" Her voice sounded small saying my childhood nickname that only she ever cared to call me.
I struggle to answer.
"Yes Lily?"
She looked away for a moment... looking out across the tall grass and over a trio of seventh year girls making leaf piles that they charmed to never flatten when they jumped into them to wade-fight with each other, one last time before they had to leave school and move on with their lives. Her eyes got a far away look in them, like she was whimsically looking out and into the future and what it could possibly hold for the both of us.
"Please don't let me go."
"And this journey that we're on.
How far we've come and I celebrate every moment.
And when you say you love me,
That's all you have to say.
I'll always feel this way."
I pursed my lips. I didn't want to think of the day where we might have any reason to go our own ways. I know, as I have always known since I saw her that historic day in the park years ago, that my own way would always be following her.
I fought back an emotional reaction as I tried to find words enough to speak what I felt.
"You know what Lily?" I asked quietly
"Hmm?" she muttered softly.
"I don't think I could."
She smiled; a great big smile that just begged to tell you that she had just completed something immensely satisfying and tedious, and she was utterly content with life at this moment.
"I'm glad." She simply put it.
And I sat there, letting her lay there. The sounds of laughter and screaming nestled in nicely with the sound of falling leaves, and the sounds of Hagrid grumbling about the kids nicking leaves from his piles carried lazily over the breeze towards us.
At that moment, I believe we were both happy with life, even if it was only one Sunday afternoon which we had left the dark and dusty confines of our corner in the Library to the call of the dying afternoon. This moment in time, I knew, would be burned into my mind until I drew my last breath, and my last thought would be of her.
I loved her. In her own way, she knew that. But she could never fathom how deeply I cared for her, and I was content with that. The thought that she loved me, no matter what her meaning of those words, was enough to keep me happy.
"When you say you love me When you say you love me.
The world goes still, so still inside and
When you say you love me
In that moment,I know why I'm alive
When you say you love me.
Do you know how I love you?"
A/n: I really hope that the people who get around to reading this enjoy it. I had to stay up all night on a Sunday/Monday night to get this out. Please, I would love some feedback on this. I have not written anything but essays on Authors and the Ottoman Empire with some DBQ papers thrown in, for over 2 years, and although I am sure that my editing skills and vocabulary have vastly improved since last they stretched, I am unsure if I did an adequate job of letting my thoughts out on the paper, so to speak.
I'm actually horribly afraid to post this, but I think I owe it to myself to post it, as I gave up a whole nights sleep to writing this. I know my Romanian Adv. Algebra/Trig teacher is going to be upset with me as she doesn't allow any coffee or gum in her classroom and I will be about dead on my feet without them. So much for 3d Art class and my paper machè jewelry box.
I think that I will either attempt writing a 'songfic' for "So She Dances" or "In Her Eyes" next. If you have a preference, please share, though don't be surprised if I don't write at all or write something totally different.
Thank all of you for reading this. It means a lot to me.
Ashley Renée (Miriel)