Title: Just Like Lightning
Rating: K
Pairing(s): Brittana
Warning(s): None
Summary: Sometimes when she kisses her, she swears she can feel lightning.
Word Count: 931
Beta: Not beta'd.
A/N: Just a drabble I felt like sharing. This is my first time writing Brittana or mini!Brittana. Hope you like it c:
Sometimes when she kisses her, she swears she can feel lightning.
She thinks it's because of the way her skin tingles and the way she smells so soft like rain. She doesn't understand how anyone can smell soft, but if anyone does, it's Brittany. Soft and clean and sometimes like honey. Santana really likes it. She likes it so much that it scares her a lot. Abuela said that boys who kiss other boys go to a bad place and that probably meant the same for girls who kiss other girls. Santana isn't so sure but it scares her because she doesn't want to go to a bad place for kissing Brittany. Not when it feels so nice.
Sometimes when she holds her hand, she thinks it's meant to be there.
She knows that her mom said there's a person for everyone and that one day she'd meet them, but it doesn't seem like she'll meet them 'one day'. She thinks she's already met her. It's scary too, but not as scary because you can love anyone and not go to bad places. So when she holds Brittany's hand, it feels so good that Santana wishes they could always hold hands, that holding hands would be enough. She thinks it might be until Brittany kisses her really quick - just like lightning, she thinks - and suddenly she knows that she can't hold Brittany's hand without wanting to kiss her again.
Sometimes when they fall asleep together in Brittany's bed after a pillow fight, she can't stop staring at her.
She starts counting her eyelashes to try to get to sleep but can't because there are just so many. She can hear Brittany's soft breathing beside her ear, can feel that warm feeling in her tummy that makes her want to kiss Brittany again, can smell the soft smell and honey. It makes Santana smile and she can fall asleep easier when her head is beside Brittany's. She wonders why anyone would go to a bad place for something like this. She doesn't come up with a good reason.
Sometimes when she talks to Abuela about Brittany, she thinks maybe Abuela knows.
She'll say things about how sweet that Brittany girl is. She'll tell Santana that it's nice for her to have such a good friend. Santana will tell Abuela how Brittany always makes her laugh and how Brittany is the only person - other than Abuela - Santana likes to talk to. Abuela will smile really big and tell Santana it's cute that she's friends with her, but then she'll say how Santana and Brittany might not always be friends and it hurts Santana because she really hopes they will. She can't imagine weekends without soft honey smells and hand holding. She can't even imagine swing sets without someone beside her. She can't imagine life without lightning. It makes Santana sad but she puts on her big girl face and tells Abuela that it's no big deal, she'll make new friends if she has to.
Sometimes, when Santana is older, she thinks that maybe she could be enough for Brittany.
She thinks that maybe she'll be strong enough to say she loves her and needs her. She thinks that maybe she could come out and even tell her Abuela. She knows she might lose her, but if she has Brittany, Santana thinks she'll be okay. That maybe she'll always be okay if she has Brittany. So when Brittany talks to Santana, Santana tells her she'll do anything for her and that she's Santana's best friend. She never says those three words out loud, but somehow she knows that Brittany gets it.
Sometimes when her Abuela will hang up the phone on her mom, she thinks that she'll never be normal again.
She wonders when she started liking the wrong people and when she stopped caring that she did. She doesn't tell Brittany that it scares her still, that she wonders if she'll go to a bad place or if people are right and she won't go to any place at all. She doesn't like to think about that because then she doesn't know if Brittany's enough and Brittany's always supposed to be enough. So she never tells Brittany about that when they lie awake at night. She doesn't say how, even if she goes to a bad place, she knows Brittany won't because Brittany hasn't done anything wrong. It's always been Santana and never Brittany. She thinks that anyone who ever thought Brittany would isn't thinking about the right Brittany.
Sometimes, when she really misses her, Santana will take out her old notebook with the pictures in it and pretend they're still together.
She'll laugh and cry at all that they've done and wonder when Brittany wasn't enough for her. She thinks that maybe she's always been enough and that Santana's just afraid she isn't enough for Brittany. When she sees her holding hands with Sam, though, she's happy because Brittany's smiling again and she misses that. She doesn't tell Brittany how much it hurts to see her hand fit into someone else's when Santana's seems like it won't even touch anyone else. She doesn't even say how she wishes they were little again and could pretend to be asleep on weekends and share soft honey kisses. Santana just smiles and walks back to her car, pretending the heat she feels on her face is from the rain and not herself.
Sometimes she's enough for Brittany and sometimes Brittany's enough for her.
She thinks today isn't one of those times.